Am I cheating on him?

My suggestion (if this is a real story) is you break up with your fiance and then instruct the guy that you like to break up with his girlfriend then the two of you can be with each other. You definitely don't love your fiance since you are asking this question, one who loves someone deeply doesn't need to question oneself or others, they don't ask for opinions. So its better to just break up with your respective partners. Its still not to late, you are still single and can still choose who you want to be with, just be sure of what you're going into and what are you gonna lose. But if you want both then go for both, as long as you're not married, you're not breaking the law, just hearts. The closer you get to light, the greater you're shadow becomes.

If you've done nothing more than have lunch with this guy because he's an office mate of yours, that's not cheating. You have a fiance, yes, but that doesn't mean you can't have male friends... just like your fiance can certainly have female friends. Where it crosses the line is if this man in your office tells you that he has feelings for you that are not just friendship. You say that you cannot tell him to back off or stay away from you. Actually, you CAN and should do that if he becomes a problem. If he insists that he wants a relationship with you, you will have to tell him no. You love your fiance and plan to be married so why jeopardize that because you want to be "nice" to someone at work? If you don't discourage the guy, he may think that you like him too and he may definitely try to court you. I'm sure you don't want to have to deal with that so it would probably be a good idea to establish some boundaries for your friendship sooner than later. You don't want it to end up causing trouble. Good luck! :))

well i would not call it cheating you have a fiance that you have been to together with for more than five years. you should stay with your fiance because only know that guy a year an your not sure if he will leave his girl friend for you but i think you should stick with your fiance an stop dream about that guy cause sometime they act all nice at first an after they just left. be with some who love you for who you are an not what you look like are wear .just keep your coop worker as a friend you guys can still have lunch you can have fun but once you don't make out its not cheating .

I dont think you are cheating if you have a good time with one of your friends, in my culture you dont cheat before your kissing and sleeping with each other with "intentions".

You're not cheating at all, basically, when you cheat, you're doing more than that like actually confirming that you two are secretly dating, saying those I love you's and whatnot. But remember, when he gets to the point yet again in confessing, clear it out about how much you love your fiance and you're not interested.

Definitely not. Just because you enjoy time with him it doesn't mean you are cheating. It's like enjoying time with friends but it doesn't mean you're cheating on your husband/wife or boyfriend/girlfriend. I suggest you tell him that even though it's sweet that he likes you, tell him that it's not right for you two to be spending a lot of time together because you two are already in a relationship. You two spending a lot of time together could put serious risk in both your relationship because it can lead your partner into jealousy or you might develop stronger feelings for your coworker. If you do start developing stronger feelings for him, then that can mean you are cheating on your fiancé.

I think I can relate to you. I once had a more than 5 years relationship with a guy. We planned to get marry supposed to be this October. The situation happened last year. Two weeks or more after he left to work overseas, I met a new guy, now my current bf. Yes, you are right. I broke up with my fiancee for this new guy. I cheated on him and I wanted to correct it. Unfortunately, it was the new guy that i chose. Going back to your story or question. There is no cheating for now, but it may lead to cheating when you continue to tolerate your officemate's actions. As you mentioned, you know his intention. He has a girlfriend and you are engaged. It may be harsh for you to avoid him, but that is the proper way and the right thing to do. What he is showing you may not mean to you, but eventually you may fall for him when he continues courting you. So, as early as now, you need to be distant to him before it will lead to something more intimate or before you fall. Guys are good into sweet nothings and persistent when they sense that you are liking it.

It's not cheating unless you get emotionally or physically involved with him. Still, you are putting yourself in a situation where something could happen, and I think it would be smart to only socialize with him in group settings.

I think that no matter what other people say if you feel like you are cheating you are. I say this only because it seems you fee guilty for entertaining the guy in the first place, and the fact you're considering continuing to to get him off your back... well it seems to me you're worried it would be cheating. I think it could become worse, so it's better to just tell him that you both have someone and that friendship is all you want, and all you'll ever want.

Girls and guys can be friends. and it depends what you mean by courting? I would think courting means dating and kissing and planning to make a relationship with him, but you are clear that you are not doing this... Tell him you can be friends like bother and sister, but you do not want more than this because you love your fiance.. If he respects you he will be okay with this. If he is not then he is not that nice and respectful of your feelings. It doesnt sound like youv lead him on to think you want more, but you should make your views and feeling of the situation clear to him?

Hello rhodz, WEll, if he likes you to be his friend, i think that's fair. but my instinct says that when a guy says that, it's usual something more like than a mere friendship. you can make friends with him as long as he doesn't cross the line. what i mean is that when he started touching or talking to you way beyond friends use to talk about, it's time to think. make sure that you are on your guard when you are actually feel that he might take advantage of you. always follow your instinct when ever something is wrong.

you are not cheating. But you better set boundaries with this guy friend. If you don't it might develop into a temptation which might be bad for you and your fiance...

I think you've cheated your fiance about your time with your friend instead. you must give more time with your fiance it's not bad to get close to your friend but know your limits if you really love your fiance. Be honest I know it's hard to control our feelings but if your morally upright to your fiance get away every incitement of desire.

You're not cheating but it is better to stay away from the guy because he's got intentions of going after you. I have a girlfriend and she hangs with this guy who is nice but obviously likes her. It doesn't make me feel comfortable despite trusting her. I don't want some guy near my girl. It causes a lot of fights between me and her. Just my opinion...

I would wonder why you have been planning to marry for five years but have not as yet done so. I would also wonder why you are having feelings and questions about someone else when you are engaged to another man. If you are sure you are inlove with your fiance you should marry him and not be interested in other men. If you aren't really inlove with your fiance then you should not be engaged and need to get on with your life.

You are not cheating actually, but what I think is that you should spend less time with him, just so you don't put yourself in the position to cheat on your fiance, because you say you love your fiance, then stick with him. Don't let this guy talk you into choosing him. My advice though, since this guy already claims that he likes you, don't ever yourself in a situation were you two are alone or anything like because it'll give him a chance to make a move on you. Its okay to have guy friends though, but sometimes you have to back off, if that guy has strong feelings for you and you are already in another relationship. Just be careful.

Im sure you love your fiance,but you have feeling on office mate. I dont consider that its good for relationship between you and your fiance if you still keep ambiguous with this guy.

Friends are always friends. Lovers are totally different from friends. The feelings also should be different when we meet a friend and a lover. If you have a wrong feeling in your mind when you meet your friend, definitely you are cheating your Fiance. If you have such feelings stop this relationship as soon as possible. If it is a healthy friendly relationship, continue this friendship.

No,you don't cheat him.

5 years from now you have plants to get a married that why you enjoy your life to become a good girl that why you are comfortable stupid like courting a guy, you are to be a loving each other that can be mate a guy you like it.