I want to get this off my chest... (sorry it's long)

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Not literally. I sometimes forget non native English speakers think these phrases are odd. Anyway, I've alluded to some problems going on with my mom over the past year. We got a diagnosis quite a while ago, but I just didn't want to say anything, other than to a couple of people. So here is the deal. My 51 year old mother, has Alzheimer's disease. Now having Alzeimer's is bad enough, and I know a lot of people here have had loved ones with it. But she's 51! Problems began about four years ago, and she had to quit her job teaching at a local college. I completely understand if you stop reading now and pass on this discussion, I won't expect a lot of replies. I don't know how many tests were done, so many theories were thrown around, and many doctors who are highly regarded in their fields checked her over, from head to toe. And she has it, she has Alzheimer's. The thing is, she remembers who she is and her past. She has forgotten things like how to dress yourself. My dad found her house keys (no, we do not let her drive) in the fridge. She can't remember how to do laundry. I once found two pairs of dirty underwear in the dryer. She hadn't washed them, she just put two pairs of them in the dryer. And she couldn't figure out why that was weird to us. So I do their laundry now. I don't live with them, but I guess their home is the place I spend the second most amount of time. She has had violent outbursts, but only with me, not my dad. She came up behind me and shoved me into a wall. Thankfully, she has not had any outbursts like that in awhile. The mother I knew, the one who was my best friend, is gone. That's just a fact. It's frustrating because the things we know she can do, she won't do. That's just the result of the change in personality this disease brings. She was a wonderful mother. She was amazing in everything she ever did. And she was the perfect role model for anyone out there. All I can do is love what I have of her. Patience is hard to have because unless you've been here, you don't know. For instance, she wakes my dad up every two hours and asks if it is time to get up. He hardly sleeps anymore. And he is not a complaier, so the fact that he talks to me about it tells me how tired he is. She gets up in the middle of the night, changes into her regular clothes, goes to the bathroom, comes back out, and changes back to her bed clothes. All with the light on while my dad is trying to sleep. And she'll do it a couple of times. And she knows what she is doing. She just doesn't realize it is odd. And she gets pretty cranky if one points it out. Sometimes showing extreme patience isn't enough and she lashes out verbally. That's pretty tough too. I have had some people say, how could God let this happen? Well, my mom, me, my parents...yes, we are all Christians, but who the heck ever told anyone that Christians wouldn't suffer too? God didn't make this happen. It's called life. And I'm not living this life on earth just for the now. I'm also living for the life that comes after. I am so thankful for the many years I had with my mother pre-dementia. Now, this is a personal discussion, so I would appreciate those who like to belittle people's faith and say God's evil or whatever would save that for a discussion about religion or politics. This about something I want to share, not provoking someone just to get a reaction. Some blessings have emerged from this mess though. My dad and I are closer than ever. You might have noticed some posts this past year when I brag on him or something. Our relationship was never great, but it was passable back then. Now, I'd say we are pretty good buddies. Also, my mom got on disability. She's worked most of her life, and the past several years have been pretty tough on my dad. He's worked himself into the ground to make ends meet for them (which was pretty darn hard before my mom had to quit). And here is the kicker, it took 2 months to get her on disability. Two months. That is unheard of. It took me five years to get on disability. There is a BIG difference though. She's 51 and worked until recently. Whereas I, did not. But still, two months. It's amazing. And my dad can finally breathe a sigh of relief. That's a huge blessing. Anyway, I don't know what finally made me want to share, but there it is.