Would you feel comfortable with staying or not staying at your in-laws home?

I can understand how you felt. I won't feel comfortable if I am in your position. But nonetheless, make good of the situation you are in and all will be fine.

Hi Cream, sorry to hear about how you feel at the moment, but I'm sure you'll find the way to solve that soon, maybe you just need to talk to you husband more about it and maybe give him more chance to discuss it with you. As for me, I'm very close and have a very good relationship with my to be parent-in-law. I don't have any other in-law as my fiance is the only child in the family. So I'm glad that I don't have any problem staying around with them when my fiance is not around and I do hope to keep it like this until we are married and hopefully have kid. I hope you will feel better when your husband is back. Good luck

This has happened to me alot in the past.It do not anymore as my mother in law passed away a few months ago.I use to go with my husband aswell as our children to his mothers and he had to always do things for her while we were there aswell as do things in that area for his other relations,hence stuck at her house with her no matter what.Thankfully i had to only stay there once over night,that was due to a wedding that we all went to and we were all over the limit to drive,lol,so that did not bother me.In the end i got fed up of the feeling of getting dumped at hers on my own with the children,as i did not like her much.

I have always been very close to my in-laws. They are family. i have never felt uncomfortable to have to stay with them. i hope I will always feel that way about them.

I would rather just leave and look for a place to stay while my husband is not there. And I hope that when he returns, we will just be staying in our own place. I am in very same situation. I find it hard to live with my inlaws because they speak like swords and won't really bother if you will be offended or hurt. I also do not like to live there because we are being compensated, like we pay for everything but there are five of them while it is only me and my husband. We can't save because of the situation.

In your situation, I might suggest you go with your husband. If you are not comfortable with your in-laws, then maybe you shouldn't stay with them right now. But in the meantime, you should try to practice being more assertive, just take it one step at a time. That way, if your husband has to go away again, you'll be OK staying with this parents. Also, know there is a difference between nasty or aggressive and assertive. If someone does or says something that you don't like, speaking up about it in a calm, polite manner is not nasty or rude. You have to let them know that you don't like it, otherwise, they will continue to do or say things without knowing that you are unhappy with it. (This mostly applies to people who aren't doing and saying things to purposely be rude or mean to you though.)

if i am to be married, i will not choose to live with my in laws. i will make sure, and tell my hubby to be that i do not want that and i will not be comfortable and that we should start and have our own home.

Its good to fight back but not always. You should always respect your inlaws specially your spouse's parents. Afterall they will not be with you all their life and when they go you will miss them. I have experienced it and miss them a lot. There are so many issues where you need guidance. If they cross boundries they cross it unknowingly. They feel alone and just like a child need attention so they do these things. I am glad you are quiet, your husband should be your greatest supporter and then all things will go well. Believe me I confided everything with my husband and he would console me and I would soon forget everything. But mind you, he would stand up for me whenever there was need. Thats all a women wants.

Hi cream! I don't have in-laws but my b/f's parents are much like that to me. We have been together for almost 5 years now and he is very close to his family so we visit them often. I don't mind staying there while he is not BUT they have not given me a reason up to this point to be uncomfortable. I am a bit funny though and people are often walking on thin ice with me..LOL...I have trust issues I guess. If they hurt my feelings..I would not say anything out of respect but it would cause me not to visit as much or at all. There are limits..I know what you mean.

I think you should very much speak up for yourself, regardless of who it is people should treat each other with respect regardless of the situation. I am very lucky in that I am good friends with my in-laws, they actually stay over my house when my husband is away and we hang out as friends would after my son goes to bed. I cherish this relationship with them and I do know that this is very unusual especially with mother in laws.

me too, i also feel uncomfortable when i am left in the house with my in-laws. i just feel that i am not that easy to get along with them. i just cant free doing anything i like because i ve got to respect them. i need to behave and say something very carefully in order not to hurt their feelings. in a condition like that i prefer to stay in my bedroom waiting my husband to come than i have to come out and get involved in family's conversation..

I rather not staying at my in-laws home because it's very stressful. Much better talk to your husband about your sentiments and I am pretty sure he will understand you. Also, you could also do whatever you wanted to as a plain housewife.

Mt personal opinion on this,I WONT. However given the circumstances you have to live with it if you don't have a choice but live with your in-laws. I'm on the same situation as yours. Currently I'm living with my in-laws, both me and my husband works and we have different day-offs and work schedule so most of the time I'm left alone with my in laws. The good thing is that my in-laws are not what we call "monster-in-laws".My advice,try to mingle with your in-laws try to play a good role as a wife and as a daughter-in-law to them at least you would feel at ease in some way or another everytime you'll be left at home with your in laws. Hence, having your own house would be a better way to have your own family. Aside from having your own privacy you'll be able to do the things you want to do with out thinking of other peoples perspective and comment.

I have the same attitude that's why I feel so burdened when my in-laws stays with me. I understand their situation of their need to stay in my house but still I treasure my privacy. It is very hard to adjust to their attitudes and it will be very hard for them to understand your ways too.

Currently I stay in my parents home and used to visit my spouse house once in a week. Some weeks we stay in their home for two days. I think they take care of us with love and care. I think it is great to stay in place where people who really love us and take care us. I always feel uncomfortable to stay in places in which people set boundaries.

I wouldn't feel comfortable staying at my in-laws. You usually have to go by their rules and so forth and I wouldn't care for that. If it was just for a night or only afew days I might be able to handle it. You have to tell others how you feel. It isn't healthy to keep it all bottled up inside.

Hi, Cream. How are you? It seems that you are in a dilemma... Well, I have this kind of problem, too, when husband and I was still living in the province and we had to move to and fro his home and my parents'. It wasn't very easy for me to do this. I did not like the idea of staying at his place because I just couldn't be as comfortable as I was when I'm with my parents'. I had no problem with his siblings and his father (his mother is deceased already) but since it isn't my home , my movements are limited and it seems that I need to ask them for everything that I had to do and would be using. That alone was very stressful for me to dealt with. Not mention that, my husband often left for work and it took him months to come back. No, I'd rather not live with her siblings and father without him there. It is very uncomfortable. As for your situation, you need to tell them how you feel. This might create strain between you and his husband. The best way to do is to stay with your parents or somewhere else if you are not comfortable living with your in laws while your hubby is away. You can not force yourself, dear. It'll be very stressful for you and the in laws, too. I hope you will get out of this situation with flying colors...