i am a bad child

As the older child you truly understand the efforts of your father, as you too are struggling with the efforts of meeting basic needs for your family. I am sorry your father is sick and still has to continue his household obligations. You continue to check on him to assure that at least he knows that you are concerned and caring. I understand that you are unable to help him at this time, so I would suggest to continue to hold him in your prayers and ask the Lord to somehow allow you to help. If not with money at least to allow him to be at ease. indahfth we can help people so very much with prayer and although we would love to help via money sometimes life does not allow us to do this. The power of prayer, can go a long way. Bless him and hope he feels better soon.

I can well understand your feelings indahfth. As the eldest in the family you feel the responsibilities should be shouldered by you. Maybe this is our typical Asian mentality where we still come back to help our family despite having our own family. I think your parents should understand your situation and do not demand so much from you. It is the reverse for me, mom is still subsidizing us when we are in financial problems. Well, she has a money tree planted in her backyard.. Just kidding but yes, mom has a heart of gold and is forever helping out not only to her children but to charity too.

I am sorry your father is ill indahfth, I hope he recovers soon. I don’t feel you should feel bad that you have not been able to help out; you can only do what you can. You can pray for him and help in other ways.

I feel like you do at times. Although my mother is already a pensioner, i still think that if i have not married early, i would have enough money to give her. Now, my priority is my own family which shouldn't have been the case. but it's no use wishing upon something that you could've have done. We just have to face the harsh realities that even if we wanted to be good children, things don't always go as planned. We just have to rely on what god has en store for us.

Hi Indah, don't feel bad about yourself. everyone is hoping to be able to help their parents and family so do I. but sometimes when the situation is happening and that there is nothing we can do instantly but feel sad, then we shouldn't feel bad about ourselves. there were many times in my life that my mum is really not well but she still have to work for the younger one and I was studying that time which there was nothing I could do to help and it did really make me sad. I hope your father will be ok soon, be patient and don't forget to pray

I don't think you are a bad child. you just happened to be in a circumstance that you can't help. circumstances don't make us bad persons. anyway, maybe you can find means to be able to help your parents? maybe borrow money just to spend for his medication, good food and supplements? it may just be a temporary setback but that will be a good thing to do for your father. :-D take care!

I hope everything will be okay for you. I really pray that that your father will be fine very son.

I am sorry your father is ill. I don't know what is wrong with him but I do know that sometimes when I was ill and still had to work, I got better faster and was able to forget my pain while working. Maybe this will happen for him. I include you and your family in my prayers.

Many people do have to work with pain. I have discovered it hurts worse on the rest cycle. Maybe when we rest,we have more time to think how bad it hurts. Since you can't do anything about him having to work, maybe there is something you can do. Bring his meals to him. Rub his tired feet and back. A few hugs with love and kindness can be the greatest pain killer of all. Your husband is healthy. Maybe he can help in some way.

really? i dont think you are bad child... you had a limitations and i think your father understand your condition...

Hi, Don't feel bad over this issue. If you really capable to help your family,then do it. Let's discuss with your husband see whether you guys afford to help your father since he was ill now. Of course, it won't be for long term ,but at least for this moment,your dad may need rest to get himself well.

Hello there, Indahfth.... I can very well sympathize with you on this. It is true that we sometimes feel guilty that we are not able to help our parents because we already have our own family take care of. This is the burden, especially for the first born, I guess. But do not torture yourself, dear. What happened had already happened and you can not take it back. You need to move on now... My parents used to tell me when I was young that they aren't expecting us to help them even if we can manage to help them already ( that is after graduating and getting a job that can pay both my needs and theirs).All they care about is that we will never going to suffer difficulties the way they did.What is important for them is that they know and see that we have a secure future. That's all that matters to them. And, I believe to all parents. Do not blame yourself if you can not help your father fully right now. I believe that they understood. You can help them once in a while. Do visit them ,dear, even if you have that guilt in you. They will greatly appreciate it for sure.:) Goodluck and I hope that your father will be well soon...

i think every parent doesn't want pay back from his children. we can pay them with praying and with material if we have. i also cann't help much my mother but i try to help her. so just pray for our parents

Self pity will do no good to you. Think positively and clearly. You have identified a problem and now try to find the solution. Involve your contacts, relatives -discuss your problem and try to seek their help. We are what our thoughts have made us. So be careful what you think. Words are secondary. Thoughts live. They travel far.

No your not, why do you think so? how old is your brother? and how old are you? can you give money for your parents to help your younger brother to finish his education? ARe you working or not? is there any problem on your behalf that is the hindrance for you family to receive a help coming from you?

That is not the issue of being bad child. You have another way of helping your father by means of taking care of him and pray for him to recover from illness. Then try to help him a little if you have in financial matter as you know you can afford. Time will come eveything will be alright and going to smooth. Love your parents ny helping them not only in financial and material things around us. Prayer can be the best at all. Have a nice day and be happy!

I don't why you said your a bad child, my friend. I don't get your point what is the reason your being a bad child...

dear indahfth, i knew of many husbands who are insensitive to the needs of his wife's family. i know how hard it is for you being the eldest. so now that you know of how difficult it is to be a full time housewife and just dependent on what your husband gives, i suggest that you keep a few pesos from what he gives you for expenses. dont say you are saving or am sure he will not like that. you can then use that in times of emergencies, either in your own family or to help out your parents. ann

Just give them some support show them your love to them. It doesn't matter if you can't support their needs just be with them right? don't think that you are bad.

I understand how you feel, but you are not in a position to help so you are not a bad child. Maybe all of your family can get together and put a few pounds together over the next few months, to maybe just help with every day expenses then maybe your father would be able to cut back on how much work he has to do.