Spending time with kids

You are not alone in your dilemma. There might be something from your childhood or something that has caused you to be like that to your kids. Being a mom is one great responsibility a dad can't do or have. It's hard, but sometimes no matter how hard we want to do things right, we still end up doing the exact opposite. I also have treated my child in ways that i'm not supposed to, and it made me feel bad and guilty, and have regretted the actions. But thankfully, getting advice from this site and from friends have made me realize to be more loving and caring to my child. Control your temper, take a deep breath, and pray. If there's a will, there's a way.

I agree that not only mothers having emotional attachments with their own children. But also the males who have healthy relationship with children will certainly enjoy the company of the children, as the children are very presence itself have good effect and worthy.

Only a mother knows what it is to take care of children 24x7x365 days…no help, no respite, no excuse…you cant even afford to fall sick. No wonder we mothers feel so frustrated and depressed, we hardly have any life of our own and in such trying times, we take out our frustration on our kids. Don’t feel guilty about it, this happens to most moms and its good that you’ve realized that you want to change. I have only one advise for you…every time you lose your temper and want to hit and shout at your child…THINK ABOUT YOUR OWN CHILDHOOD. Think about the times your own parents scolded you or beat you up…how miserable you felt for no fault of yours…how you wished your parents would understand you…how you wanted to just have some pure fun…now your kids feel the same, they too want some fun, they too have their own mind…talk to them, listen to them, share your feelings with them.

you need someone to talk to. a doctor, a friend, a church member or preacher. a change is what you seek and it is what your mind is telling you but you are letting the flesh control you by anger. I know a powerful thing is that you are wanting to because you are asking and seeking and want that change. pills are not the answer you need to focus on the kids. you need to let them know you love them and hug them and show them love is always there. EVERYONE kids and adults want to hear I LOVE YOU. You may not like the ways but love overcomes bad. Get out and enjoy yourself with your kids more. Maybe go to a park if you tell them to be good, start a paper with happy and sad faces. I did this and they hated to get a sad face. if they did they had to make it up with something else. give the kids chores to do to keep them from being bored and take time with them your family is important and need you. Raise a child in the way it should go and it will not depart from them. Show them love and it will always stay there , they will not forget. They will tell thier kids someday . Try to think the good not the bad. A great place for you and the kids is to go to church and pray and God will send someone and speak through someone to help you and the kids. Joy unspeakable and full of glory..Do not let things steal the JOY from you. keep control ..you need that joy, smile daily and enjoy your family they grow up to fast...take a deep breath and speak to yourself you are in control and you will not lose your temper, you have peace and comfort and love . Think good thoughts not bad , what you say in your mind will make your body do. say to yourself I love my children and I will talk softly and with love will I show them. I am at peace and my thoughts are good. close your eyes and tell yourself I am blessed with happiness and love. Tell you kids you love them daily. they need to hear that...so do you..ever need to talk I am around somewhere. Smile often.

I never lay my hands on my kids, I often shout at them when they do something wrong but it doesn't mean i don't love them. I am very busy with my work but i always find time to talk to them every time they commit mistake and make sure that they understand what they did was wrong and never commit it again.

as a single mom like me ,i have no time for my 2 kids too. because i need to work and i need to survive for the sake of my 2 kids. i need work everyday so that i can give what they want but the pain is always there.... i have no time for my kids. i want to hug them every now and then but i cant. thats why i am not happy to myself and i know my kids are always missing me too.

Hi, I guess you are having a kinda of depression after giving birth to your children. Do you ever have a plan to visit a doctor for consultation? I guess you really need it. How about having a discussion with your husband to handle yourself? Your children are still young and they really need your attention and loves and cares. You have to be there for them all the time and try to spent time with them Since you have decided to give birth to them,then why you just ignored them? I don't mean that you are not a good mother,but you have to try your best to be a good mother for them. and I do believe they will be very happy to have you always at their side.

Thank you for posting this because I am feeling the SAME thing. I have not posted it myself because I am afraid of being judged. Anyway what i did in the past was to call a friend, pack up the kids and go. Go to the beach and enjoy yourself. When you have had a good time, you will see that you cannot stop smiling and life seems more managable. I have yet to do it myself. My son is having his exams. Its even better to leave the kids to the sitter for a while too. Do what you can afford but dun despair, i believe this is the solution.

Oh dear, you sound to me as if you may be suffering from some sort of depression. I think that you really MUST visit your doctor and tell him all of this, it is not fair on either you or your children - you are both missing out on so much love and affection. I do so hope that you can get sorted out, this must be a nightmare sitation for all of you.

I'm also a short tempered but I never abuse my children physically. Sometimes I cant control myself shouting at them but after a minute I will always say sorry to them and kiss them and tell them what they did was wrong thats why I shouted at them. I know its wrong I just cant control myself shouting at them especially if they are fighting and scattered their toys. I love my kids so much I just shout at them if they commit mistakes that is really annoying.