Would you ever do this to a friend?
By Ruby_Dawn
@Ruby_Dawn (617)
Spokane, Washington
October 29, 2010 8:39am CST
as some of you may know from another post I made I am having problems with my roommate and I have HAD it with him...I will out line what is going on
a guy I met online 7 years ago moved in with us back in May of this year,we have been very close for many years he has even came and visited me a few times so I thought I knew him pretty well and was excited that he was going to be living here.
well after a couple months of being here he started making me feel uncomfortable,he was always finding a reason to touch me whether it was on the shoulder,leg,head where ever,then he started complaining that I was not showing him enough affection and I was not making enough time to spend with him,pretty much acting like I was his girl friend or something..after awhile my husband got a little upset by this as well so we asked him to move out at the end of August and he said he would move out..so I asked my Cousin if she wanted to move in because she was having problems in the place she was living so I figured it would be a win-win situation so she came up here thinking that my "friend" would be moving out soon but it has now been 2 months since we asked him to leave and he still has not gone and my cousin has been having to sleep on the couch until he moves out..we have told him that him staying this long is causing too much stress and is not fair not only to us but to my cousin as well and he still won't even give us a date that he will be out by so it looks like I will have to evict him :(
so I was wondering would any of you do what he is doing to one of your friends? if they asked you to move out would you move out or would you stay until they had no choice but to evict you?
2 people like this
7 responses
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
29 Oct 10
Hi Ruby Dawn,
This guy does not like a friend at all. You have given him far more notice and patience then most people would. I think I would not only give him an eviction notice but I would pack up all of his things and let him be the one sleeping on the couch. Does he pay rent? Does your cousin pay rent? Maybe having a cop talk to him would help move things a long a little quicker?? You should not have to be forced to put up with an unwelcome guest and it escapes me as to why someone would even want to be an unwelcome guest.
@Ruby_Dawn (617)
• Spokane, Washington
29 Oct 10
unfortunately where I live I can not just pack up his stuff or even call the cops with out first giving him a 20 eviction notice.
he pay's the light bill and the phone/internet bill but when he moved in he also agreed to pay the cable bill and put food in the house which he does not do.
my cousin does put in more money then he does that is why I feel this is so unfair to her.
you know I wonder that my self all the time,why in the world would he want to stay here knowing that he is not wanted or welcome
@kodukodu84 (1569)
• Malaysia
29 Oct 10
I really do not see if he's even a good friend of yours. If he knows you are married ant still have husband, then why should he try touching you and even complaining you for not spending time with him. Ugh! Not a type of friend that I will actually want to have around. He already promised you and your husband that we would move out and by ignoring his promise, to me that is quite rude especially your cousin is already there and have to sleep on the couch. If I was in your situation, then yes I would ask the guy to move out before he ruins my marriage. And if I was the guy then of course I will move out as I promise unless if I have a thick face.
@Ruby_Dawn (617)
• Spokane, Washington
29 Oct 10
thats exactly what I thought I mean we had been friends for years but then he starts acting like that even knowing I was married so obviously I was wrong about how good of a friend he was :(
@Sir_bobby88 (8231)
• Singapore
29 Oct 10
If i were you , i won't even let him stay with you in the first place . He harbours werid intention and obviously your husband should be much more important than him why bothered with a internet friend that much in the first place
@Ruby_Dawn (617)
• Spokane, Washington
29 Oct 10
we were looking for a roommate and he offered and me and my husband talked about it and we both agreed that it would be a good idea,like I said he had visited us before and he didn't act like that then so we thought it would be a good idea...but boy were we ever wromg
@carolbee (16230)
• United States
30 Oct 10
First let me say you are so kind to let your friend and cousin stay with you. Try giving your friend a specific date, maybe like Thanksgiving, and tell him he has to go. If you have to tell a little white lie like you are going to move in another family member, do it if it will get him to leave. Not so sure I would consider him a friend if he moves in and begins to touch you. He knows you are married and that's rather inappropriate. Calling the police would get him out of there but that could cause all kinds of issues. Would be worse if he began to stalk you once he was out of your house.
To answer your post here, I would not take advantage of a friend who was kind enough to let me move in. If the friend said it was time to go, I would go. I won't "use" my friends.
@ladym33 (10979)
• United States
1 Nov 10
He is taking advantage and someone with morals would never do such a thing. Does he have an alternative. Does he have any money? Is he employed. I think I would give him an end date and maybe help him find another place to live. Give him some kind of notice like 2 weeks or a month and then tell him you don't want to get the police involved but you will if you have to. But he may need some assistance finding another place to live or affording one.
@tummalapalli (251)
• India
12 Nov 10
Thats really ridiculous that he is not moving out.... I would never go to someone's house in the first place.... Because it would be disturbing for them in one way or the other.... I advice you throw him out of your house... There is nothing wrong in that.... be a little harsh if you care even a little for your cousin....
@Laurelle11 (409)
• Australia
29 Oct 10
No I would never impose on a friend like that and if I were you and you felt bad about evicting him I would remove everything from his room and put my cousins stuff in there instead and make him sleep on the lounge. I wonder how long he would stay then. Good luck with your problem and I hope you can resolve it soon.
