how to ask her nicely without hurting her

You can invite her to a coffee store or another place, just her and you. You should is to ask her something before mention this problem. When you discuss about this problem, you must question her gently, but do not angry. You can offer her to give back things. Maybe, she borrow them for her family (she is your relative). If she like those things, you can help her to buy one if you can. Remember, don't be so angry when talk with her, say gently and hear her answer ^^

Just ask her flat out. You might be concerned about her feelings but this is the perfect time to catch her. If she over-reacts then she might have something to do with it. If she didn't though then there's a big chance that you hurt her feelings but you can always apologize for that.

What???? Why would you even care if you hurt her or not! She is nothing but a thief that you trusted with all your valuables. She obviously did not care what you thought, or how you would miss your articles. I wouldn't be pleasant, sorry. I would never trust this woman again in my house. Sit down and have a talk with her and tell her exactly what you saw her husband, son, or daughter wearing. Better yet, if they are wearing it in front of you, grab them and ask them where they got this. You can make a police report also on the items stolen. I'm wouldn't sweeten this up for nothing. She is a THIEF.

hi,Trust is very important and u all had trusted that person however u found some things missing in ur home.We should have proper and genuine proof to find who is doing so.Its only way is to catch the time its being done.we can never ask about the missing things .Its only thing is that we should be in safe prior .u lock up all the things which are valuable.Then u see for one or two weeks wht is going on in ur home.If u find they are miss using the facility u had provided and ur trust on such persons is waste u shd take them off from ur home.Asking never solves.Hurting is also nver happens.Take care by urself if u cant then also dont trust anyone and hand over ur home.Enemies are all round.Friends are very few.Dont loose best friends.Dont let enemies into life.

You just have to ask her in a nice way. Moderate the tone of your voice. And it's not your family who need to be ashamed or to be cautious on asking her regarding the issue, because what she did is a form of stealing, so feel free to confront her. It is your right as the owner. Hear her side and settle the issue in a pleasant way. Thank you.

I am really impressed by your kind behavior with a thief. I think you should talk to her alone and clearly tell her that you know about every things and tell her that only reason that she is here is only because she is relative, other wise she would out of here. Tell her clearly if this thing happened again then you ll kick her out, just give her a last warning. Dont be kind on this kind of person. This can be problem for you in future. If you ignore these things then she can do any thing in future, which would be very painful for you... Be happy and be the reason of happiness for others...

This is really hard since she is your relatives. This is one bad thing with having a housemaid who is our relatives. They tend to become abusive with our goodness and trust. That is why i don't like having one. Well,for me if this ever happen to me i will talk to her. I will always consider her feelings,but i won't let this happen and goes for long. I will tell her that if she won't stop the bad thing she is doing,much to my regret i will send her away. Giving her a second chance is considerate enough and humane. But,if she will do it again,sending her out in my house is also reasonable for me. I had given her a chance but she proves to be unreliable. I know it's not easy to do such thing,but sometimes we need to to protect our own belongings. Have a great weekend

Its just not possible to talk to her about this without hurting her... If you really dont want to hurt her... Then you better not talk about it at all and just try to avoid such things happening again.... Its better you just leave her and avoid her because if you had to talk to her about this.... Even if you try to be polite, the situation warrants you at one stage or the other to become harsh.... which would surely ruin the whole relationship....