lead your children

Malaysia
November 11, 2010 10:33pm CST
The other day i went to my friends house, she have 5 kids, age from 21 to 7 years old...the parents make them do house chores like sweeping, cleaning bathrooms, wash the hse compound this and that. Then i went to her house again but this time i can hear that the eldest became rebellious after being tired of doing house chores.... I have kids too but i dont make them do the house chores because i aim them to be a leader or successful person. Now if they are successful do you think they need to clean sweeping pick up rubbish and this and that for the house, is it so important for them.... m sure many of you gone tru the same.....
3 people like this
17 responses
@jazel_juan (15746)
• Philippines
13 Nov 10
there is nothing wrong with teaching the kids to do chores, it disciplines them and teaches them responsibility. I do expose my kids to household chores but i do not over load them. maybe with your friend she got her kids overloaded. ^_^ Even if they would be successful or brilliant in school i would still encourage them to do chores, it does not mean they would not be doing chores, i want to teach my kids that freedom comes with responsibility. Even though they would be succesful and grown up and independent, all of these comes with responsibilities that they should never forget. Just like with household chores, even though i love them and want to pamper them, they still need to chip in and help me with the household chores and with this they would be disciplined and be better individuals and not spoil brats
@jazel_juan (15746)
• Philippines
14 Nov 10
may i ask if what do you mean by new ways of bringing up children?
• Malaysia
13 Nov 10
ok tks for your view, maybe if we new mothers with new generation approach our children with new outlook that old ways of bringing up children may bring new results, try it.....
@momof3kids (1894)
• Singapore
12 Nov 10
I agree with having to make the children do house chores but not until they overdo it. I know someone who did this until at a point that the children did not seem to get proper education.
• Malaysia
12 Nov 10
There you go...most of them dont really succeed in their studies only fairly
• Singapore
13 Nov 10
This is my aunt actually and she got so upset that my sisters do well. My mother was the sort that put education first. So she used to find other flaws of ours. Like a less than s*pick and span house unlike hers which is cleaner than a hospital. What a sourgrape! O my I do sound like a sour grape too..
@Sreekala (34312)
• India
12 Nov 10
Hi, There is nothing wrong to give some responsibilities to kids and I think it can help them to become responsible persons. 21 years old is surely good enough to shoulder some responsibility at home. Normally elder one is supposed to shoulder all the responsibilities that irritated the eldest, I think that is the problem here. Teaching discipline is always good but at the same time don’t over burden them with house hold works. They need time for studies and some enjoyable activities too.
• Malaysia
12 Nov 10
Yes let the children enjoy studying and enjoyable activities.....
1 person likes this
• United States
12 Nov 10
I taught my kids how to do chores. It helps them be responsible as well as successful. they need to learn to be a team player and that nothing is just handed to them. To not teach them how to work is teaching them to be lazy. When I went back to school and my kids were in junior high I could not keep up with the laundry. I bought everyone a certain color of towels and showed them how to work the machines and helped them learn how to do laundry. My son was thankful when he got to college because he said a lot of kids literally did not know how to cook simple things or do laundry. I say make 'em work!
• Malaysia
13 Nov 10
Ah ha.....lazy is not the term it is more of approaching problems in a new way perhaps.....it is true a lot of kids now does not see doing house chores is important or can improve their life only education will...
@beeh13u (1037)
• Philippines
12 Nov 10
I am that kid who complains of too much chore around. I need a reward for doing those chores to keep my mouth shut. I am now 20 and still I wash the dishes and sweep the floor. But according to research, kids who do household chores excels in school. The mind is set to finish the project or other school related activity as finishing a chore.
• Malaysia
12 Nov 10
Thank you for your reply.....do have the research facts
• United States
12 Nov 10
do the parents do anything in the house or do they make the kids do it all? If that is the case then in my opinion that is being lazy and abusive, you are treating your kids like slaves. I can see giving your kids a chore or two to teach them some responsibility and alot of people out there have there kids do a chore and they get a weekly allowance for it but you should not be making your kids do it all
• Malaysia
12 Nov 10
Thanks to all for your reply, but to me Its time management and organize......house chores are routine
• India
12 Nov 10
I feel kids can be made to work. Its very important that kids should know each and every thing from their childhoold so that the dependency on others will be less. Any thing skill / knowledge learnt is never lost. Doing domestic work will not make successful leaders cannot be said.
@CRIVAS (1815)
• Canada
12 Nov 10
I think that this is an excellent question. When I was growing up, I always had chores. I had to clean up after my pets, make my bed every morning , help with the laundry and every Saturday morning, my family spent cleaning the house together so that we could all relax and have a great weekend. I think that it was very important for my parents to make me clean and take care of things, it made me a responsible person. Now that I have 2 children of my own, my husband and I take chores very seriously. My daughters bring their dishes to the kitchen after every meal, they bring down their dirty laundry, and they always clean up their toys when they are finished playing. It is our hope that by teaching them these skills, we are teaching them how to be responsible and we think that this is one of the most important lessons that they can learn at this age. My children are 4 and 5 years old and because of the things that we have taught them, most people who come across our family tell us how well behaved and polite our children are. I know that if me and my husband did not spend all this time teaching our children, they wouldn't be the girls that they are today. So I think that your friend is doing the right thing and that if her children aren't being helpful, it isn't because she is being hard on them, it's because they are being kids and she needs to talk with them.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
12 Nov 10
I think that it is important that your children have chores to do in the house so that they feel a sort of ownership for what is theirs. My two children are only seven and four years old, but I'm already working with them on taking pride in what belongs to them. That means that I expect my son to pick up his toys (he is the four year old) and it means that Kathryn is supposed to keep her room straightened up and it also means that she is supposed to keep the litter box clean. I really don't feel like I am asking too much of them.
• Malaysia
12 Nov 10
Yes picking up their own toys and clean their own room its okay sense of belonging but doing house chores duties of their parents.....duh
@ebuscat (5935)
• Philippines
12 Nov 10
For me yes I have been that responsibility with my mom since I'm single until now I get married like washing there clothes.
• India
14 Nov 10
Welcome to mylot Here in india most have servants or maid servants to do house chores like clothwash, dishwash, sweeping etc, but we teach our kids how to do these as well, most of the days these servants are absent, further the kids have to fix their own beds atleast after they get uo.. Thank you so much for this discussion. Professor. . Cheers, have a great day ahead. God bless you. Welcome always.
@del2010 (76)
• Philippines
12 Nov 10
Teaching your children to do household chores is not bad. This is only one way of letting them know how to keep the house in proper order. This is also one way of teaching them how to handle their own house when they in turn raise their own family and have their own house. Although, if you are capable of having a maid for your children then you need not let them do the household chores but still you have to teach them because you are not sure that all of them will have a better life that you have now.
• Philippines
12 Nov 10
I grew up with hands-on parents who taught me a lot about the realities of life. We were trained to help household chores without being much burdened with it. It has positive impact on me as a person, I have learned independence, and it taught me how to be a good wife and a mother too..
• United States
12 Nov 10
You have to have balance in your life. You shouldn't treat your children as if they're slave laborers, but you should also teach them how to clean up after themselves. It is awesome that you encourage your kids to set academic goals and achieve them, but in order for thm to be well-rounded individuals, they must know how to pick up after themselves. This is a vital skill. No one is saying that your beautiful, bright children are destined to become housekeepers and janitors, but unless they are nobility, at some point in their lives, they'll have to pick up a broom and a mop and care for themselves. I know of parents who did all the household chores or paid someone else to do it until their kids were in high school and began attempting to teach their children to clean. This does not work. Habits must be established early in order to stick. About your friend's situation, children, like everyone else, should be fairly compensated for their labor. It establishes a good work ehtic and the connection between work and money. "If I want money, I must work for it. I am not entitled to everything I want." et cetera.
@shia88 (4571)
• Malaysia
12 Nov 10
Hi, Actually what your friend is doing for her children is not totally wrong, but of course, she has to make a proper schedule on who and when to do it for her children.then they will do it nicely and neatly. Getting our children to involve in house chores is another way to train them to be discipline and to keep the house clean always. For me, since my son was young, I trained him to keep his own toys after finish playing. Then slowly, let him do potty training and everytime when he has the urge, he has to get his potty ready and do its business. I want to train my son to be independent. At this moment,my son is still too young to help me in housechores.but when the time is comes, I will slowly train him bit by bit on housechores. I don't see the wrong point why our children can't do housechores. They still can do housechores and also be a successful person in society.
@fathom01 (171)
• Canada
12 Nov 10
Well, it isn't exactly a punishment for a mother to ask her children to help her clean up. I say this because I am now 21 years old, and I reminisce on when my mother use to ask me to help her clean, I would throw a fit and refuse. Now I realize that was very wrong of me. Cleaning is difficult, a mother works all day to clean and cook, rarely gets any time for herself, goes to bed late because of dishes, laundry, making lunches / dinners for the next day. A little help from the children is always nice, even if you have to throw in an incentive just so they can do it.
@chocobuko (117)
• Philippines
12 Nov 10
I think there's nothing wrong with letting kids do household chores as long as it does not interfere with their studies and other activities. In fact, I let my little girl do some minor chores like sweeping the floor or watering the plants. This will help her learn how to be responsible at home. Now, she loves helping me do things at home and maybe when she's older i'll teach her other chores like doing the dishes and washing her own clothes. By the way, i let her help me during weekends only.