Facing fear and finding freedom!!!!

Hullo Jo! You are my friend and so I am writing a candid reply to what you have written. THere is a small element of truth in what your father has said. This thought was reinforced as I read through your topic again for the second time.Your initial quote from Joyce Meyer's book is a wonderful one .It has led you to studying more about yourself.I agree with it though, it is also a need for relationship[not only fear of some sort] that makes us have this need for approval. But, there is a deep feeling buried within you and this is a result of many things.As you grow older and are able to achieve something for yourself, this feeling will vanish.You say that you are forced to tell lies for some reason or other--it may be due to many reasons starting from a feeling of inadequacy to an attempt at safeguarinding your own image.You are a very sweet person and that is why you confess that you had to lie for some reason or the other. You do lack a bit of confidence and this is my instinctive assessment of the situation. As for myself, I am very confident as far as my skills go. I am emotionally weak and am very attached to some people.THis has been my bane.Secondly, I too like to be friendly with people but I am sensitive at the same time --My friendliness leads people to take me for granted and I hate it when people do this. My need for friendship forces me to be slightly contradictory in my approach and this is soemthing I wish to change in myself.I cannot say harsh words to people and sometimes , even when I am on the receiving end of some unwanted criticism or invasion of privacy I get tongue tied due to my hesitation in hurting people and my need for interactions. THis is something I wish to change.

The one thing I have been working on as I have grown older is to live as authentically as possible. To do this we need to be sure of our needs, wants and beliefs and not be concerned with other’s opinions. It is a very freeing way to live but it is not an easy road to get to the point where we can feel the fear but we can still go ahead and do what matters for us. I suppose to lie about one’s thoughts to protect others or ourselves may be a form of inferiority complex. To live an authentic life is a work in progress I think.

hijotomy I have found that with my fear of goofing up electronic things like my computer if I am shown how to do something to repair a problem but let to do it myself, then if this problem should occur again and I master the problem then I become confident and unafraid. For example everytime the electricity goes off, I am thrown off the internet as I am on internet cable. so now I have learned how to reset both the modem and the router. I do not need a repairman as I can help myself.Jotomy I have fo und in my long life its always best no matter what to be honest and not lie, lieing just makes things worse.

Hi Jotomy, I feel that I am a pretty fair and honest person. I have a strong personality, but will not go out of my way to hurt a soul. I love people, from all walks of life and will help anyone that I can, if it is in my power to do so. I have never been a timid person and will speak up for myself if someone is threatening in anyway. You can be strong, self-assured without be aggressive. Some people are introverts and will not say much and some people are extroverts who are better talkers and more self-assured. We can not living our lives second guessing everything we do, or think that we have offended someone because of what we said; that is be self-conscious and a little obsessive, maybe even a little paranoid. If a person is a good and honest person, friends will understand why they said what they said.

People have certain fears. But GOD has given us the ability to conquer this fear. We should not live in fear because it will cripple us. It will hinder us to do the things we have to do.I also have that inferiority complex when I was still student.I had a hard time dealing with it because it hinders me from doing alot of things. It came to a point that I really need to make a choice to overcome this fear that is crippling me because I won't be able to move on if I will just depend on someone to help me.I need to have that sense of independence so that I can also do things by myself. It's just a matter of choice and now I have my own kids and I always encourage them to be strong.

I can say that I know myself. I don't have to pretend or change the way I am because in the end, if I'll change for other people's sake, I will be a bitter and an ugly person. You see, I love myself and giving love to yourself is very difficult if you don't know yourself. You should, at least, be mindful of who you are; strengths and weaknesses. I do reflect on things and say sorry to people whom I've hurt in the process of growing. You should also the totality of you. You may not be the perfect person that you want to be but you became the wonderful person in dealing with all the things that had come to your life. ;)

hello Jo, The greatest fear the a person fear of is,his/her own fear.And, the greatest achievement a person could gain for his/herself is facing his/her own fears. I believed in it,because i had proven it myself. We can run away from our fears,we fear of darkness,we can switch the lights on or make a fire. We fear dogs or other animals and we can avoid it by staying away from those animals. But the thing is,it's not conquering our fears,but we were only able to avoid it. So,in order for us to overcome our fears,we need to stay in the darkness and believed in ourselves that we are safe,no one will harm us,nothing will happen if we keep the lights/fire off. We can have a pet dog or animals that we fear of,and we can play with those pets because those animals are harmless. It's facing our fears,and once we were able to face those fears,we WIN the Battle between our ownself (our very own fear). I was able to conquered my fears by challenging myself to win over it. And i made it,now i can say that i am totally free. Free from any fears,and now i do not fear anything but GOD alone,as i wrote in my profile status. Have a good day always dear

For the most part I would say that I am very happy with the type of person that I am. Most of the things that I would like to change about myself are things that have to do with my appearance. I would love to be a thin person which is something that I've never been. In addition to that, I would like to be a little bit taller. These aren't things that I am able to easily do, but I don't think that it is fear that is keeping me from being the person that I would like to be.

i do want be friendly!

you know what my friend. i admire you since you really know who you are and what you really like to do. you can decide on your own without too much depending on others. and i can say that you have a strong personality. let me tell you who am i rather what kind of person am i. actually, for the 19 years that i am here in this world, i cant say who really i am. i'm still seeking on it. but with regard to what are the things i like, well i can decide them on my own. ;)