Have you ever turned away from your friends?
By gracielle
@gracielle (346)
Philippines
December 4, 2010 9:34am CST
I did, It was one of the easiest & hardest thing I did at the same time. My friends are against my husband because honestly my husband have done lots of things that really turned my life upside down & my friends saw all that. How I cried, how i suffered, how i struggled but then my friends are also the reasons why it happened to me.
I have a job before, an online job. A very stressful kind of job because our boss was the weirdest freak ever that I have encountered all my life, a physco! & an unprofessional one. My ex-boss looks on our Facebook accounts & always investigate things that's happening in our lives.He will translate everything that goes in my conversations with my co workers which are my friends & when he don't like what we have posted, he will suddenly get mad without any reason then fire us, just that!. Then days after he will bring us back, it's like he's playing tricks on us & if I don't talk to him or just simply saying hi to him, he will also get mad about it. He wants to be treated like our king, & even in our personal stuffs he tries to dig on it. How unprofessional!
But my friends, all of them kept their ground & still proceed to work with him because he pays big, but not to me sad to day.. :( because I don't flirt with him that's why. Because we all have the same workloads & I even does my workload more than they do but he never paid me enough because I seldom talk to him. One time my friends told me to try to chit chat with my ex boss, & I'll try to talk to him but my husband was so mad about it because he knew what kind of a person my ex boss is, so we fought. The next thing I knew my ex boss fired me with out any reason, but my so called friends was not bothered at all, they don't gave a damn care about it. They don't even tried to help me stay even though they knew I needed my job so badly. They say they will hire nobody anymore to replace me, but then again I checked on them once in a while I found out that they replaced me to my friends sister. I felt betrayed, & I was sad so about it. But still my friends tried to talk to me & help me have another job if I leave my husband which is, I won't..
Here is the thing, I'm caught up between my friends(job) & my husband, I was given two separate ways on what should I be going, my job or my family. I chose my family, my husband rather than my friends. My friends are still now associated with my ex boss so I stay away from them because I don't want any connection from my ex boss. It was easy for me to do that, but it was so hard & painful for me to turn away from them but I think it was the best thing that I should do. I missed them, but I did not regret doing so. I'm happy now, even if my husbands' income isn't that enough, I'm still happy that I chose him.
I know God will help me & things happens for a reason, & I do believe that the Lord will give the perfect job for me. I'm sorry if my topic was too long, actually it's just a portion of what happen to me,but I have to stop right here..It's already too long, but hope you still read it all.... :) Thanks....
2 people like this
9 responses
@gracielle (346)
• Philippines
9 Dec 10
Sad to hear that from you, but yes to be honest your right about it. Me too at times when I don't have that much money, I don't mingle with them much.. I'm ashamed or might get lost with them. They're all single & I was the only one married, they all have money they want to spend to for themselves. I also has money to spend for them but I prefer to spend my money with my family, my husband & my son rather than spend it on them. The happiness I can feel with my family cannot be compared to any good time spend with my friends.
@thanks1961 (7033)
• India
4 Dec 10
Hi dear,
Ever since I come to myLot, I am observing so much of such cases through myLot. People are so selfish and motivated for anything for their own selfish needs. I know in many such offices have similar individual problems with bosses and other colleagues. There are occasions where we become helpless due to their immature performances. We may need to keep quiet and on several times, we never know how things are working.
Here also you both are nicely cheated by others and they are taken full advantage of you both without knowing anything. If possible, try to change your job and try to get a better one. May be it will take some time but keep trying. Our innocence and dedication would most times get exploited and if there are a group of people to support it, things would work so smoothly and appropriately.
However, do not get disappointed and be bold enough to face whatever the consequences comes up. Even in our country also similar situations are very common. Only because of higher compensation and to earn good income such people are ready to do any nasty job. Once we get some experience with such people, it is better to cut off such friendship forever and avoid the interactions with them.
Because, even I am also faced a lot of such treatment, but not from bosses, some other colleagues. The world around is like that and we need to identify such things in advance and behave appropriately. We need to wake up and work for ourselves. Yesterday also, I heard a nearby person was telling his friend, that if you keep shut your mouth, you will be stay back for ever.
So, awake and act. I think it is time for you do so. React the way how feel and keeping quite will make others to jump upon you. Our innocence is good for ourselves but others may take chances on this. If we continue the same, we may have to cry for the entire life time and no body can do anything on this. So, think why I said think both you together on this matter and take an appropriate decision, which help you in the future.
All the best,
Thank-s
1 person likes this
@gracielle (346)
• Philippines
8 Dec 10
Honestly I was so happy now, what I did was right because it turned out it to be the best decision I made so far. I'm so tired of them, my friends yes they helped me but at some point they too pushed me to the edge of the cliff. They saw everything that happened to me, how I suffered with my husband but I can't leave him just for the reason that I wan't to have my own income & have lots of money by my self.
The very thing that I've learned through this experience of mine was, happiness with the one you love is far more greater than being happy with your friends & have a lot of money. Things that money can't ever buy me, I was so glad right now especially because I saw & felt that my husband changed for the better. He saw how i suffered & struggled & he's doing he can to make me happy now. Our relationship was far more happier now than before. Plus somehow God was blessing us, because my husband had given more opportunities to his work. As they say when the door was closed, the windows & even the roof will open for you.
I'm happy now & I thanked God for always being there when I need Him...
@thanks1961 (7033)
• India
9 Dec 10
Hi dear,
Even I feel comfortable to hear that you are still happy and more precise towards you. Keep this sprit in all times and I am sure that you will succeed every steps ahead in your life. Al the best for you.
Thank-s
1 person likes this
@ganeshprabhuk (1722)
• India
5 Dec 10
Even I believe whatever happens is for good. Whatever we do is good for us. So dont have to be upset for whatever happened. I had a friend whom I initially helped him with money for his kids admission and all. Then it became a routine thing for him to ask money, so I stopped speaking to him and his wife totally. Now no problems I am happy.
@gracielle (346)
• Philippines
8 Dec 10
Yes, I truly believe that God has a planned in my life, plan to propers us & not to harm us, & you know what it turned to be great. I'm so happy I did it..
@Hatley (163773)
• Garden Grove, California
4 Dec 10
hi gracielle what an awful boss and for wo rking for probaly half of
what you could get on most off line jobs cannot be much fun. I can
see it would be hard to turn your back on your friends but I know
if it were between me and my husband I would also choose my
husband. it sounds to me like online work for someone like that
ex boss is just not worth it at all.God will help you I amsure as
you did the right thing. This is a great discussion. thanks.
1 person likes this
@gracielle (346)
• Philippines
4 Dec 10
Thanks if you think this is great discussion, actually it's not enough but I did not put most of the details because it may took me hours to finish & it will be too long that no one will try to read it.. :)
I'm happy now, because my husband thanked me for choosing him, & he showed me more love now. He became sweeter than before..
@jer2911 (57)
• Philippines
5 Dec 10
It's not wrong to turn away if you know and see that they're pulling you to the wrong direction. If they are doing so, then they are not really your friends. Don't worry, I know it's not easy but at the end it's more worth it than investing in a relationship that doesn't give you any benefit at all.
1 person likes this
@gracielle (346)
• Philippines
8 Dec 10
Actually they're one of the best friends ever but there are just things that don't worked well with them in my life. I just some time now to be away from them, I'm not ready yet to bring back out old camaraderie.. I need time to heal my wounds from my past heartaches that my job had brought me...
@krieyszel (330)
• Philippines
5 Dec 10
yes, and it was the hardiest thing i wasn't able to face.My bestfriend in just because of the rumor that she said i've spread her secrets.That the thing was i really don't understand and explain how it was happened.And i don't know, if i have a fault or not..it was really unexplainable situation.And now,she said she forgives me but, our friendship has end :(
@gracielle (346)
• Philippines
8 Dec 10
That's sad, maybe somehow you did something that made her secrets be revealed in the open but you can't do anything about it anymore. You may have other friends in the future, there's a lot actually it's just up to us if we let them allow to be their friends, best of friend. Friends are not made in an instance, it was created & molded by years. Hope we can find real friends again someday...
@chiyosan (30181)
• Philippines
5 Feb 11
Several times i have turned down my friends in gatherings. I have thought and well felr that they are n longer the peole i have been closed with when we were in highachool. We have not become what you would say god buddies because thwy sure stood me up in my wworst times. I never felt they were there for me. As if i was a plague they avoided me.
So now i am better they invite me as iff we have bwen in cpntact for the past ten years...
I guess sometimes things do not go back to the way it was...
@cream97 (29085)
• United States
6 Apr 11
Hi. gracielle. I think that your problem is not with your husband. It is with your friends and your ex boss. He is really mean and demanding!
What kind of work do you do, if you don't mind me asking you? I am glad that you were replaced by your friend's sister. You don't need a job like this at all. If your friend's want to stick around and let a nasty boss ruin them, then let them go right ahead. You just need to live your life and pray that God will make things better for you and for your husband. Everyone has problems in their marriage and I have had my share of problems too. I think that you should keep your friend's separated from your husband. If you have to keep these so called friends from you, then do so. You don't need the added stress that they are giving to you as well as your hateful ex boss has given to you!
What kind of work do you do, if you don't mind me asking you? I am glad that you were replaced by your friend's sister. You don't need a job like this at all. If your friend's want to stick around and let a nasty boss ruin them, then let them go right ahead. You just need to live your life and pray that God will make things better for you and for your husband. Everyone has problems in their marriage and I have had my share of problems too. I think that you should keep your friend's separated from your husband. If you have to keep these so called friends from you, then do so. You don't need the added stress that they are giving to you as well as your hateful ex boss has given to you!
@Kalyni2011 (3496)
• India
12 Apr 11
I have read each line of this, you have ventilated your feelings, you must give first priority to family, your husband, you may get new job, new set of friends, new boss again
we women are differnt than men in many ways, we must stick to our family lol..
Thanks for sharing
Happy posting, cheers.
Namastey. 
Kalyani
Happy posting, cheers.
Namastey.
Kalyani
