Family, one of the only true treasures in life....
@marapplestiffy (2182)
Philippines
December 6, 2010 8:28am CST
My parent's in debt...for a long time now, since their business went down on fire and my brother's death...my father is a seaman, and basically could support us but since they have big debts the money goes straight to paying it off, they recently cleared up their debts in the bank but they still have debts with some of my uncles and aunts and even some of their friends too...
I know its taking a toll on them but I'm happy to say that they never made this an issue in our family, they still give us time and my mother is still very supportive and caring for us...I could say that not having enough money made me mature and see to my needs rather than my wants...it also made us(me and my siblings) realize the more important things in life, like health, love, time for family, and the like...
Sadly, pondering on this I have also realized that since most parents today have worked hard so their children could have the things that they didn't have when they were young, most of the children now are materialistic and are not in touch with what is essential in life, that is family (which we would have like if my parents didn't get bankrupted)...
I guess as I write it down now, I'm going to write on my planner later that I would not give everything my children would want, but rather give them what they need, like love and support, presence rather than presents and most of all the gift of family...
1 person likes this
6 responses
@figurativeme (1089)
• Philippines
8 Dec 10
I admire your family for sticking it out through thick and thin where others would have become dysfunctional. And you are right, it is the nonmaterial things that are more important in relationships. The material things are just support.
Cheers arapplestiffy.
1 person likes this
@Wjsucsess (45)
• China
8 Dec 10
You do not complain,God is fair,He take you this things,but also give you other things as compensation,that time will certainly.
@marapplestiffy (2182)
• Philippines
8 Dec 10
I admire this about my family too C=
We need the nonmaterial things, though some material things are needed, like food, clothes and shelter...but most of these material things are actually just our wants...
@celticeagle (167070)
• Boise, Idaho
7 Dec 10
When I was young my presents at Christmas were a nice medium of what I needed and a few things I wanted. I had alot of family and it was like they had gotten together on it and did very well. We didn't have a lot of debt though and maybe things would have been different if we had.
@marapplestiffy (2182)
• Philippines
7 Dec 10
Being the eldest, I was the one who enjoyed the times where my parents were still well off, I honestly had extravagant gifts during Christmas or my birthdays...doll houses, Barbie, etc...and I couldn't distinguish what I needed from things I only wanted...and my parents would have continued to shower us with these extravagant gifts if they still had the funds to do so, I guess God had planned to make us in debt so I could learn to be mature and that my siblings won't grow up spoiled like me...
1 person likes this
@GloomCookieLex (6073)
• United States
8 Dec 10
I haven't had very good experience with the idea of family. My mother worked on the time and was rarely home when I was growing up. My father never worked and was an abusive leech and layabout, he never did anything for us but spend my mother's money. He even made a hobby of pitting my sister and I against each other so we hated one another nearly all our lives. I didn't have much extended family because they all lived in different places. I saw my father's mother and sister on every holiday, I almost never saw my mother's family at all.
My in-laws are all self-centered, abusive jerks.
As far as family goes all I have now is my husband, my mother and my sister.
1 person likes this
@marapplestiffy (2182)
• Philippines
8 Dec 10
Well, your still luckier than most I guess...you have people you could call family now...
@shia88 (4571)
• Malaysia
9 Dec 10
Hi,
I totally agree with your statement that parent shouls not give
everything their children want,but instead they should provide their children what they need for their living, like love,care,support and trying to spent
more time with their children.
I do see some parents pampered their children with lot of
toys(those expensive branded toys),but they don't spend much time
with their children,instead they let others to takecare of their
children. Especially when out for holiday trip, they don't bring along
their children,but instead the couple just went travelling by themselves.
Actually the children need more quality time with their children
instead of those expensive toys to accompany them.
Therefore, being a mother of one boy, I am telling myself to give
the best for my son..give what he needs which may lead him to
be a successful person in future.
I don't pampered my son with lot of toys,as long as, he is discipline and
be a good boy, I am happy enough.
1 person likes this
@starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
6 Dec 10
Hi marapplestiffy: I completely agree with you and your description of this social problem. I have seen how some little boys are rude with their parents simply because they don't give them a toy or take them to place they want to go. Sometimes parents beleive that giving their children all of the things that they want, that's they way they express their love to them and that's not the answer. It's better to expend quality time with the children and teach them the importan lessons of life, that they need to work and to study to get what they want that we express love. At the same time I think that being a father or a mother is a hard work.
ALVARO
@marapplestiffy (2182)
• Philippines
7 Dec 10
Hello there starsailover!
Being a parent is truly hard and your right most parents think that giving their children all the material things they want is a show of their love and we can't hardly blame them too especially if they grew up wanting the material things they couldn't have and now that they have the power to give it to their children they surely think it best for their children...
@nangisha (3496)
• Indonesia
7 Dec 10
I think its great you can see many positive think in your situation now. You lack of money but now your family had many love in return, I think its worthed. I think its bad situation that God allow to happen there positive think if we wiling to see.
