Press it mom, press it....

Dearest Dawn, From time to time I seem to hear a patronizing tone in my daughter´s voice. I don´t like it much and tell them so. They deny it and say they speak to me like that out of love. HA!!! I´m an expert in language and they aren´t. But at least I hope I will have some years of independence fron my brats. My mom is treated like an idiot by my brother. My sister told me that when they were at her house in the south, my mom had to be taken to the hospital for a bad flue. My brother was there. He even give my mom´s name to the nurse. OMG!!! The lady´s main hobby is to read and her favorite author is Saramago, the portuguese Nobel Prize. But in my brother´s eyes, she is stupid. My mother dreads her son and is very happy when he has to go somewhere else. She is a diabetic, but if she wants to eat a bit of icecream , I say let her do it. She is 86 years old. I´m more interested in the quality of life. It seems that we must prepare for that treatment and learn how to fight it.

wow. i dont like the small casinos. here in az, they are allowed to hold machines for each other. once i went and couldnt find a machine anywhere except one a lady kept saying she was holding for her friend, 3 machines down playing that one there should be a law. and in vegas there is. only place i like to play where they always have machines available. But i know what you mean. it used to annoy me how new players would scream and carry on every time they won 3 quarters geesh. and sometimes you have to listen to that for long times till they either move away or you do.

hi oh dawn do I know that one, after our hair turns grey a lot of young p people think we are now senile and can no longer function like they can. wrong wrong wrong. show us something once then let us at it. that poor mom her daughter probably thought she was being good to her but mom should have said,okay you showed me, I have got it go have some fun yourself.I remember the godawful rehabilitation place I was sent to when I had my shoulder joint replacement, oh my I was in my 80'ts so had to have a diaper on, she came in and was going to put that thing on me and I said I do not need that. I am not incontinent. what on earth are you doing? I got up and limped to the bathroom while the stupido stood there with her mouth open. I guess in her small mind all women over 80 wet the bed as a matter of fact. then one comes in with a tray. and starts to feed me, and I was now really angry. I have been feeding myself since I was two. go help someone who needs it. she said but your arm is in a sling.I said I happen to have two arms or didn't you notice? she did leave.sure I needed help like in cutting food but I sure as hell could lift a fork or spoon to my mouth.I was never in my life so eager to get out of there and back home on my own.That was the most awful experience in a sort of hospital like place I had ever had. my experience in the hospital was fine as I was treated like Ihad common sense.but I was only there for three days hen shunted to that horrid Care HOuse. I checked on the net and they were at the bottom of poor rehab places. they had been cited for fire hazards and pooe food selection for patients.there had been fifteen law suits brought against them. Onewas for leaving a very ill patient who had seizures unattended. Her side rail was down and in her siezure she rolled off the bed and broke a hip.

I would have been cranky as well. When I used to work at the hospital it would absolutely drive me insane when I would hear the family members of our patients talking to them like they were little kids. I never understood how they could treat them like that. My grandmother was 86 years old when she passed away and though there were times that I would somewhat have to talk to her as I would a child when it came to technology, the vast majority of the time I had to talk up to her because she was my elder.

Guess what happens when a back-seat driver goes in a casino with his or her mom? I've seen families where the parents live with their children. And because the parents are under their roof, people think that they can talk to them as if they were their kids. A bit sad. I hope my kids wouldn't talk to me that way when I come to live with them.

LOL, if I had a child, guiding me every step of the way, my Alzheimer would have kicked int and I would have yelled back, Knock it off!! I got this!! When I am on a roll and we are talking about perhaps winning money everyone around me has to leave me alone, as I cannot have someone nagging every step of the way. I as in one of the other slot machines would have been so irritated I would have been quite it already. LOL..

or maybe they were trying to annoy you enough that you would leave so she could have your machine...

I guess your mom is more engrossed in the machine than the voices around. Somehow when the person is engrossed in something of interest, one can become tolerant of the environment no matter how disturbing it is.

When i first read this i thought it was gamblingg, hehehe, sorry dawn, not just familiar with the terms... And once and for all, i would say that tags are helpful to give us better idea with the topic, just told me you love the interest of parenting, and its unfair to you i wont respond here, oh seriously i am waiting for this one to take her pills. It early 3 already. Okay, back to the nice topic, oh elderly get forgettable sometimes, hehehe., and in the same manner also, they appear or sound silly at times... I can just remember my grandma when she was still alive, as if she acted like her childhood, yet unfortunately all of us would experience that when we are fortunate enough to reach those old age. Morning dawny happy lotting.:-)

It is hard to be around older folks at times. I recall watching my mother breakdown there toward the end. If you are around someone 24/7 it would get aggrevating. I would think that the lady was letting her mom play to be nice and was acting like a back seat driver. When we get old and are slow I how we have nice, patient and positive folks around us. Hehe

Well there was always the possibility that you may have won! I did not see anything wrong with having a little gamble if it is not addictive and this is cash for you amusement. My husband was a race steward on most Saturdays and he would place a bet in hordes but he really loved to see them run. I once owned a race horse but I believe that I have posted about that. It hated me. The point I am making is that my husband put X amount of dollars in his right pocket and if he won then the winnings went into his left pocket. Once the right pocket was empty that was the end of him betting any more money. It was what he could afford to lose. With is winnings he would stop at a big store on the way home to us and but things that we needed for the house or buy clothes for the children etc. He never took his winnings and bet it back on the horses.So never had a problem with him placing a bet. and of course when things were rough then he did not bet at all. Yep, if my children spoke to me like I was a senile idiot then I would really take exception

Ok, so you'll just have to get on myLot more often so you can have guiltless fun at the casinos - hee hee!! So how was mom's reaction to the daughter? My parent-in-laws are just clueless . . . they seriously cannot follow instructions or do things for themselves. We have to explain things to them a zillion times - and they still don't get it. It's like they can't focus "or something". We literally have to talk down to them as if they were children because they just simply don't understand (and I'm not kidding). My sister-in-law just bought mother-in-law a laptop (I don't know why - maybe to motivate her to finally use the computer). On Tday, we all tried to explain to her how to friggin email (which we've explained so many times to her for years) - and quite frankly, I think she still didn't understand. I emailed her a couple times and she hasn't replied yet - which makes me think she probably hasn't even tried to check her emails. Sigh. ANYWAY . . . so maybe that mom is like my mother-in-law . . . just doesn't "get it". If it were me, I'd probably yell not to talk to me like an imbecile . . . but my mother-in-law never yells that - she just gets a frazzled look on her face and you just know she doesn't "get it".

People get over-excited when it comes to money lol ... this woman was no different.Little did she know that her over-encouragement paved way for a discussion in here

Hey, I like the Wizard of Oz, too, but it never seems to pay anymore. Once I won $240 on it after just sitting down. The guy next to me said, "I just left that machine; that would have been my jackpot". I don't think so! Anyway, I hate it when people talk "baby talk" to older people. Even people with Alzheimer's respond better to "adult talk"...you just may have to state it several different ways, but most (not all) will get it. I sure hope no one talks to me like that in another couple of years!

Yeah, I don't think she would forget how to play that fast....that would totally drive me nuts..maybe the plan was to drive you nuts so you would move on so they could have another chair/game to play? It might have worked for them before. My mom hates people who repeat themselves. She would be elbowing me to shut up fast if that had been me..lol.

I do not know why People talk to them like that, even if they do have Alzheimer at least in Public speak to them like Adults as it is so down grading for the Person, they do not deserve that they deserve respect and dignity

I am not sure why people do that, but it ranks right up there with raising your voice to people who cannot see. Their vision is impaired, not their hearing. With the elderly, their body is slowing down, not necessarily their mind. We passed this cartoon around of a little old lady talking to " a medical professional". She says "Now listen here, I have taught 3600 students over the years, including generals and mayors and I have survived the first and second World War, and YOU are telling ME, when to eat and go to bed?"

We politely tell mom she is the 'Lord of gamblers'. You know why she spend most of her time at the club playing the jackpot machines. That is the only leisure she can spend her fortune on as her doctors did not give her passport to travel on vacations. Gambling has become her expensive past time for the past years. I like going with her as I get tips each time she wins big. Mom is no nonsense and at her age, 75 years old, she is mentally strong and is in full control of her lifestyle. She listen to none of her 10 children and we have to abide by her rules which is sometimes obsolete.

Hi Dawn, I think its not wise to talk to people like that. not to the elderly and maybe not even to the children either. i guess no child would like to be guided in each and every baby step they take. Hmmmm just as a wild guess maybe that mom was enjoying the attention of the wife as she might be in the mood to write a will. So anybody who shows that they care would be a good contender.

I am sorry for that mom, Maybe her daughter would like to show to her mom how to use the machine but her way of doing that is annoying. I hate to say this but I have same experience with my aunt who is patronizing my grandma. And my grandma never say a thing for she thinks that my aunt knows what is best for her, but the worst about is there are things my grandma could not enjoy doing because my aunt is there to scold her. :(