Have you found the love of your life?
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
Philippines
December 9, 2010 4:24am CST
I always wonder if true love is real and those things I read from the pocketbooks can actually felt by a person in love. I had fall for guys before. But I usually consider so many things that I don't allow emotionality cloud my judgment. My friends say I haven't fell in love yet. Can you share to me your experience?
2 people like this
15 responses
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
9 Dec 10
Hi snowhybiscuis!
Fortunately yes! I found the love of my life 17 years ago and we are still in love with each other,he is my husband!
I guess you really haven't found yours since you haven't settled down for good.
I could say when someone is in love,he/she shares the same passion for everything,works as a team,together through thick and thin,loyal to each other,cries with each other,laugh with each other and solve problems with each other. If you feel all those things to a man,then you are in love!
1 person likes this
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
Hi mtguanlao.
I think you are right. Once, I thought I was in-love but I guess it was really not. Because I get to help him a lot but whenever I ask for help from him, he seldom helps me. That thing turned me off and lacking the effort from his side made me realized that I was not happy with that kind of attitude. And so I decided to wake up from my reverie and decided that it was just the taught of having someone that I was in love with. Because you see, if I really love him, then I would be able to accept him and his faults. Don't you think so?
Glad to know that you found yours already. It only proves that fantasy can happen.
@jbrooks0127 (2324)
• United States
12 Dec 10
True love is not of the things you find in the pocketbooks. That is romance and fireworks and basically it is because you are new to each other. You only gain true love after you truly get to know each other and find that you think and feel very much like each other. To be true love it must be a love very much like a mother has for her children. You care deeply for them and know in your heart they feel the very same for you.
That takes time and patience. While you may have physical attraction in the beginning and it will feel like it may be love, in time that will change. So what has to be left is a caring friendship. If you truly care about each others well being and you become very close friends, then you will experience true love.
It is, first and foremost, compatibility. You may not always agree with each other but you respect each other enough to get past that. If all you have for each other is the physical attraction it is not true love, and in time, it will end.
When you meet someone that you begin to care more and more about and it is clear he feels the same for you, then you are on your way to true love. But it takes time. It takes developing a deep friendship and with that comes the knowledge that this, is the one for you.
A lifetime with someone is not always fireworks. At times it can be difficult, but if the foundation of love is there you will always work through the problems and come out on the other side so very happy you have found your one true love. It takes work, it takes dedication, it takes compromise. But it is Ohhhh so worth it. And yes it is absolutely possible. I am living it.
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
12 Dec 10
Hi jbrooks0127.
Your story is very much the same with my parents. However, theirs started with an elopement. LOL.
My mother was 17 years old when he married my father who was 26 years old. They almost separated during their young married life. I was a witness to almost all their bickering and I was traumatized seeing it. However, as they kept staying and living together despite their differences, I also saw how they were able to forgive each others weaknesses. They developed friendship in their relationship. Now, they are celebrating their 37th year together.
I hope I'll find that too. But if not, I have my family to focus my love for.
Thanks for your inputs. It is very nice reading your comment. It is very positive.
@ebuscat (5935)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
For me it is instant if you feel it because love it is happened when it is time for you true love is wait in the correct time.
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
Instant love for me is something that I doubt if it is real love. But love does start with attraction. For me, real love last and it takes time to make it stronger and deeper.
Thanks for your input and sharing your idea about love. Happy mylotting.
@funkeyguhl (1743)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
Feelings can vary and the why it is being described in pocketbooks are not 'exactly' what you would feel in real life... though would say that they did experience what they have read.
As for me, I am proud to say that I have indeed found the love of my life and is very fortunate that I can spend the rest of my life with him because I have married him. :)
What to use - your heart or mind - all depends on you. For me, most of the time, my decisions are based on what I feel other than what I think. For this decision that I have made for our relationship, I have let my heart rule and I have to say I do not have any regrets with it.
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
12 Dec 10
I commend you for using your heart over your head. Maybe that is one thing that I am low at. I often used my head over my hearth. Now, I got accustomed to it. I also refuse to inform a guy if I like him because I was afraid of being rejected. I don't have that much courage. In the end I also have no regrets but it does not leave my thought the question "what if...".
Thanks for sharing your experience. Enjoy mylotting!
@elims15 (69)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
I already found the love of my life. And she always gave me insperation in life, She always gave me strenght everytime i have problems she always comfort me. Shes the one who always there for me. Thats why i cant leave without her, Shes the one and love of my life.
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
You are very lucky to have found her. Take care of her. Try not to give her heartaches. Let her feel that you care for her. Women are more emotional than man and a little irrational. Make sure that she knows how you feel about her. Give her assurance.
I hope you'll have a happy life together.
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
Cheating is not love, I agree with you. I believe that if you love somebody, you will not cheat on that person. Instead, you remain loyal to that person. But sometimes, when we are in love, we have to watch our emotions. We become jealous and irrational. Would you believe that I got jealous just seeing my ex-bf in a picture with his female co-employees? I am wiser now and I realized that if you love somebody, you would also trust him/her. But that is one weakness of man. We cannot really say that we cannot feel jealous. The key then is communication between the two of you.
Thanks.
@shia88 (4571)
• Malaysia
9 Dec 10
Hi,
Yes...I have found my true love and we have been together
for more than 3 years before we settled down and start our own
family.
Now, we are husband and wife and also parent of our son.
When I first met my husband, we were still young and no chemistry at all.
We just went out for movie and after that no more further contact unless
just sending each other some nice emails.
Then one day, we started again our conversation via email,followed
by phone contact and then we met up again. We just be friend for few months,till
I noticed that he seem fall in love with me. But I was not sure because he has never tell me about his feeling for me.
Only then, one day, he told me that he like me...I was shocked and was
quiet for few seconds. But I did not give him the answer straightly, I still
need time to get know him better before I want to commit as his girlfriend.
At last..I gave up..I accepted him as my boyfriend and we were dating for more
than 3 years..lastly we decided to get married. And now here we are....we have a happy family now.
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
Wow! That's a very nice love story. And the good thing about it is that it is very real. I wish your family happiness.
I think how your relationship grow is what I wanted for myself. I tried to look at reasons why I fear getting into commitment. Then I would realize that maybe, it is not really for me.
When I was younger, during my teenage, I have many suitors. I was focused on studying and wanting to help my family. It was not a good timing. When I started working, I met this guy who was my bf. He was 2 years younger than I and he too, asked me to marry. But I was not ready. Then I had this friend that I thought I loved. But then he doesn't feel the same way for me and so I did not encourage my feeling. Maybe, the right time hasn't come yet to me.
I am thankful though because I am happy with my family and my niece. Also, I have friends who really cares for me.
I found the love of my life more than 20 years ago. I lost that love to an illness four years ago. i still miss him everyday. i know that someday i could find that kind of love again.@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
It's good you never lose faith. You are very lucky to have felt being in love. You can say you've lived life to its fullest. I wish you luck in finding your next love.
@lady_di1210 (263)
• Philippines
9 Dec 10
I don't know if I call this true love.. but I'm not the mind-over-heart kind of person. Before I used to think having a lover is a hindrance to once goals, achievements, and success in life. Until I met someone who changed my perspectives.
At first, I wanted to be friends with him then infatuation developed... By the time he courted me, I was hesitant and weighed things out before I mentioned a word.. Because I was very interested to know more about him, my answer was 'yes' even if it broke my promise to have no relationship not until I graduate in college.
Maybe I'm not too picky in finding someone to love, because the one I love right now is the first relationship that I've ever had in my entire life. I don't read romantic pocketbooks, but I'm quite sure this thing that I feel right now is love...
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
Hi lady_di210.
It's good to know that you too found your love. I pray that all relationship would last because there are already several broken relationships. My parents has been together for 37 years already. They say that it takes hard work to keep the relationship and then the difficult phase would pass.
Good luck to you and your love.
@marybeauty (73)
• Philippines
9 Dec 10
I dont know if i really found him. But this is what i feel when i was with him, im very happy and complete.
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
Maybe if you will exert extra care for him, it may grow to real love. The wise man says that time can tell if what you feel for that person surpass challenges and difficulties. But sometimes, liking is not really loving. It could be a good start though.
Thanks.
@frenzylady (518)
• Philippines
9 Dec 10
Hello there! Yes, I did. It may not be always happy, there are times that the road to love is bumpy however, the experience always will help strengthen your relationship with your lover. Cheers!
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
You are correct. And the bumpy side is usually untolerable for me. But if you love him, then you can stick with him and stay beside him. My belief is that if ever I fall and the guy would love me as well, I would stick with him for the rest of my life. Yes, I am quite a romantic. LOL.
Thanks for sharing frenzylady.
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
I see. Sorry for that. But the lifespan of everyone is not similar. And I believe that life here is but temporary. If you have found the love of your life, even if he/she is gone, you are lucky to have some memories to get back to (specially the happy ones).
You may find another love and I believe that if so, a heart can be big enough for another chance in love.
Thanks for sharing.
@juniorstringbean08 (455)
• Philippines
9 Dec 10
It is real. It is based on how you feel for that person. If a day without him/her felt so incomplete, things like that.
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
10 Dec 10
Sometimes what we feel is misleading. There are people who had the same feeling to two or more persons. How can that be real love? Don't you think it can only be a mind condition?
@cryox92 (168)
• Macedonia
9 Dec 10
I definitely still haven't found the love of my life yet, maybe it's because i think I'm too young for such a thing, or maybe because i don't believe in a thing such as "real love". Maybe someday, somewhere i will, but it's definitely not going to be in the near future :).
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
12 Dec 10
It's not one of your priority at the moment? I hope you'll find it when you are ready. Don't look hard for it because if you really need love, you will find it without looking hard. And I surely believe that it will come at a right time.
Good luck.
@redmaryjane (891)
• United States
10 Dec 10
We found each other about 5 years ago. We met online and we've been on this long distance train for 5 years. It's not for everyone, and while we met each other at points in our lives when we hardly even knew ourselves. Looking back, we really did see each other through tough times. In all truth though, if we had met earlier on, we wouldn't be on the right path in out own lives. I pursued a career that needed my commitment here, and he needed to settle things with his family. The journey we went through is too staggering for words. For one, the hurricanes that flew over the US in '05 and '07 kinda stalled our communication and I went wayward and fell in love here, still keeping in my heart. Meanwhile, he found out that he has a son. His ex-girlfriend who slept with another man while they were still together. She thought that the boy belonged to the man she slept with and married him thinking he was the father. Turns out it wasn't his. She kept the boy a secret from my man for 7 years and she tried to get him back. She won once, but he kept coming back to me. I was hurt, but there was no sense in ending our relationship. It just didn't make sense because breaking up isn't worth what we went through together even though we are separated by an ocean and a continent. I'm flying back to the US after 24 years, first and foremost to meet him, secondly to start a career. Even though we're apart, we're the kind of couple that finish each other's thoughts and sentences, and in spite of ourselves, we feel safe with each other. Because of his job as a firefighter, we talk once a week now. I love him so much.
