Children's Lessons, Adults' Practice
By Qaeyious
@Qaeyious (2357)
United States
December 11, 2010 8:59pm CST
A recent discussion disturbed me recently.
There were lessons I learned as a child, like do not lie, do not steal, share what you have, things like that.
Becoming an adult is a most liberating experience to a former child, being free of parental supervision, so yes, there are certain behaviors that can be used as a celebration of freedom. And little by little we learn when it is appropriate to lie, or rather withhold information that would be hurtful, when to assert independence and when to give to a common cause. Things like that.
Still there are behaviors that are unacceptable no matter what age we are. Murder is the most famous example. Stealing is probably the most popular. Beating people up for one's entertainment, as opposed to self-defense. I am pretty sure most people here would agree, these are incorrect behaviors.
Not that it stops some people, even as adults.
What kinds of things causes people to go against civility and behave in such violent ways?
I heard some stories about being abused as a child. That happens to many, but not all of them go out and commit crimes as adults. On both sides, what happened to turn the child to proper social behavior or to the improper?
Or they get involved with other children who commit violent crimes as children for fun. I have less information about that option, but I hear it also happens often. I suppose it's easier not to grow up and continue having fun, but I don't think it happens in most cases. I can't prove it, but I suspect most do turn to the socially responsible.
Please comment as you see fit.
1 person likes this
3 responses
@figurativeme (1089)
• Philippines
12 Dec 10
Hi! One factor that influences the behavior of a person is the environment that person is in. One may have been abused as a child but was fortunate to have loving environment in the growing process that the child ends up a better person compared to another abused child who was unfortunate to have people around who reinforces the violence. So it is the life experiences that one gets in the process of growing up that defines a person.
1 person likes this
@sagnik42 (3592)
• India
12 Dec 10
Hi Qaeyious,
I feel there can be a lot of reasons why adults (and sometimes children) commit crimes.
A person can commit murder in the heat of passion. Sudden anger, or insanity can lead to a person committing such offense. As for other crimes like stealing, beating up a person are usually done for self gratification more than anything.
In the case of a child, the offences are committed because they do not understand. Many kids resolve to violence means because of how it is depicted in movies and TV. They find it cool and a way to exert their opinions on others. Some are influenced, like you said, by friends and people who use the kids for anti-social activities.
1 person likes this
@Qaeyious (2357)
• United States
12 Dec 10
Yes, I concur that most children do not understand committing criminal acts is wrong, even if they find it fun to do. Now to understand why a child refuse to grow up and understand that as an adult it is most inappropriate, that is the issue.
A sudden fit of passion or emotion, yes, I heard of that happening. I even experienced sudden anger, but I never, as an adult, attacked another person because of it. That is inappropriate behavior that I learned in childhood as incorrect behavior. I don't know too much about insanity to use that as an excuse for such behavior, and I will let the experts comment as they see fit. But for a functioning adult, it is no excuse. When one is an adult, one should deal with such disagreements in a civil manner. Being able to beat another person up does not prove you are right.
Not that I'm accusing you personally of doing that, of course. Just that here in the United States it seems like there is a growing consensus of behaviors that are becoming acceptable that I find most - unpalatable.
