I have cried...
By shibham
@shibham (16977)
India
December 17, 2010 9:55am CST
Hi everyone...
We had been living in a same home for 26 years. We shared our all everything without any hesitation. But now both of us are separate...
She is my sister. Only one sister... you may say only one sibling. Last monday, i mean 13 December... she got married and has left me in loneliness....
I don't know even i can't remember when i cried for the last time... but just after her marriage i have cried almost daily basis. Not so loudly but silently. When i come back to my home, i feel her emptiness... her necessity... one cup tea made by her... her consciousness towards my daily schedule... her love... and all everything. I am unable to speak in details now.. i hope all of you have understood my mental status.
By the way... Have you ever cried in the same situation that i have faced. Really i miss her.... Really ... I loved her and still love.
Thats also the reason that i was not available here in mylot. sorry friends.
4 people like this
13 responses
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
18 Dec 10
I can feel the pain in your heart for the only sister you have has left a void in your life after her marriage. You have to accept the fact that women have to be married off earlier than men as their biological clock is ticking away very fast and you should not be too sad as she is only upgrading herself to the status of a wife and found a new happiness in the person she love so much. She is not totally detaching from her roots and would not wish to see her happiness becoming a sorrow to the family she left to start one of her own. One day she will be back with her extended family and maybe bring you niece and nephew that will bring sunshine back to your life. Do give your blessing to your only sister so she'll find happiness in her new life.
2 people like this
@shibham (16977)
• India
18 Dec 10
Hi zandi...
Everything that you have said are very true and universal. It's her next step of her life which is a dream for every girl. I know she is more happy with her beloved one and my love is still around her. I think after someday situation will be under control and i shall be normal again. I know it will take somedays more. Have a nice day.
1 person likes this
@Sreekala (34312)
• India
18 Dec 10
Hello Shibham,
Actually I really don’t know how to pacify you. 26 years is really a long time and by this much time she was there with you, her presence was visible everywhere, there were happier moments and I know that you shared your mind with her. Now you feel her loss. I can understand that emptiness. May be your home become a sleeping home now.
You have to realize and accept the truth; girls won’t be there with us for long time. Time will heal your wound; slowly you will accept this and will make a compatibility with this situation. Please keep in touch with her through calls and you can also visit her frequently. She will be there for you anytime but her physical presence won’t be there. Within a short period you will adjust with the new situation. All the best to you for getting out from the harder feelings.
1 person likes this
@shibham (16977)
• India
18 Dec 10
Hi sree....
When i enter in her room and see the bed where she slept make me worried. I know that girls are not to stay whole life in their parents family and the basic truth is they are born for others... to love, to serve and to stay.....
Perhaps my feelings is more than other as we were only two siblings in my family. Have a nice day.
2 people like this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
17 Dec 10
You must be very lonely. You must rejoice that she is in her own home and happy rather than lost to you forever. I lost my oldest brother to cancer a few years ago and cried for months. Just remember that she is still here on earth and you can still see her and talk with her.
Are you friends with her husband? If not, be friends with him. Look at this as gaining a brother, not losing a sister. I hope your sorrow eases soon!
1 person likes this
@shibham (16977)
• India
17 Dec 10
Hi friend...
Many many thanks for your support. I better understand that she is still around me but can't forget her love... be sure. We both were too childish in action.
Not completely but i am trying to be his friend and hope he will make her happy all the long. Sure, i have met my brother as i have none by birth....
Have a nice day.
@mods196621 (3652)
• Philippines
18 Dec 10
That is natural to feel if you have companion and with somebody for almost all of your life because you gonna miss their presence. You gonna miss everything she do and all her things that always done for you. That is for sometimes crying only time will come you will feel the same as natural and for sometimes you remember her with a smile in you heart. Yes I understand that you love her and we know that not all of your life she will be with you . There comes a time that separation may happen and that is what exactly happened to you now.
@shibham (16977)
• India
18 Dec 10
Hi mods...
I know whatever you have said but sometimes it seems too hard to forget those intimate moment with her. I become nervous when i remember her and feel her emptiness. it really strikes me. Anyway thanks for your nice words and have a nice day.
1 person likes this
@leeh2229 (85)
• Philippines
18 Dec 10
Crying is a thing i haven't done for the longest time! I've learned not to cry a lot since i ended my last relationship! But i guess it is much healthier to cry! Cause you have an energy to burst out your emotions!
shibham what you're going thru is alright! It is good that you cried! try to see your sister more and accept the situation that you have now! Be happy for her and soon you will be happy then! :D
1 person likes this
@shibham (16977)
• India
18 Dec 10
Hi leeh...
Well, i am not that person who cries a lot. I have already said that i can't remember when i cried for the last time. But this time i was unable to control myself and cried silently. Nobody even heard a single weep of mine.
yeah, i have accepted. Have a nice day.
1 person likes this
@kalav56 (11464)
• India
17 Dec 10
Hullo Shibham! Hope everything went on well and you are back to your normal routine.I can well understand your feelings .When I was young, I wept buckets when my sister got married and went away.I missed her so much you won't believe it. SLowly, my routine took over and that became the way of life.After that life changed , what with my classes, edication, marriage etc...,
. Similarly, you would feel terrible this month . Soon you will come to know that your sister is happy at her new place and there will be visits and get togethers giving you a sense of anticipation. GOd bless!
@krajibg (11922)
• Guwahati, India
18 Dec 10
Come on. This is the relation that is hitting you now as your sis has been married off. Why do not look at the positive things that she has got her home and you are the proud brother to visit hers once in a while.
I too had cried when she was married off but now I have got used to it and I hope you too would feel the normalcy after sometime.
I am sorry that I could not attend her wedding as I reached home quite late.
Would surely go to her home with a gift pack.
@shibham (16977)
• India
19 Dec 10
Hi boss...
Yes i have seen all the positive things and i have no complain either. I am proud to for being her brother. Yes, i hope time will run with my normalcy.
Yes, she asked for your presence. I said details and now she asked for your visit ti her father in law's home.
Have a nice day.
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
18 Dec 10
hello dear bhai,
Of course i do understand what you feel.
Missing someone in our family is really sad.
Our mom is working and living abroad for more than 20 years now and visited us once in a year.
20 years but still we are not used to her absence.
Every time she comes home we are so happy,but the moment she left again,no one among us wants to drop her off to the airport.
Then,it take us days again to moved on from her absence.
Well,she never leaves you totally dear bhai.
She might be physically away,but emotionally she is always with you too.
Have a great day dear bhai
@eurekafemme (5876)
• Philippines
18 Dec 10
Oh, dear, you are so sweet thinking of your sister that way.
You shouldn't cry, dear even if you do miss her a lot. Sometimes, we need to let go for our loved ones to spread their wings a little further and to learn things that we can not teach them or find their love.
You should be happy for her now that she is being taken care of the man she chose to love. Hush now, Shibham... You'll be fine, dear.:)
@shibham (16977)
• India
18 Dec 10
Hi eureka...
Thanks for your compliments.
No, i am not crying rather it's the feelings that too hard to forget about. We were four in a family and now become three. I believe she is more happy than before and her happiness is my heartbeat. Have a nice day and thanks for your warm support.
@eurekafemme (5876)
• Philippines
21 Dec 10
i hope you are feeling better now, dear. at least better than the first time you posted this....
@kodukodu84 (1569)
• Malaysia
18 Dec 10
I can understand that feeling dear. I always feel the same kind of emptiness and lonliness everytime I have to say good bye to my family or to my love one when I have to leave to where I'm working at. The place is a few hours by flight from my home town and even farther away from that with my love one. I hope you will feel better soon and will get used to not having her around as usual. Good luck and have a nice day
@shibham (16977)
• India
19 Dec 10
Hi kodukodu...
I am highly familiar with loneliness. I work in a separate place more than 100kms away from my home and sometimes stay for a long time. Again, when i was a university student, i stayed in hostel and did not come to home for months. BUt this loneliness is something different but i believe that time will heal it. Have a nice day. Thanks.
@asliah (11137)
• Philippines
18 Dec 10
hi,
crying is natural and normal,
especially when someone left you,
and feel that you are now alone,
but your sister is always there for you,
having own family doesn't mean she will forget you.