Protect Our Babies From Bad Mommies...

Sad one and there are real people on the planet doing this. It reminded me of the recent case (ok it was in 2009) where the dad kept the daughter enslaved in the basement for years and had some kids from her. Anyways, as that is not the point, Yes, we have some customs (mostly confined to rural areas and also the traditional mindset based people) here in India where they dont allow much interaction between the girls and boys. I am not sure why but they are prevalent. And yes, many families still consider the Boy Friend- Girl Friend concept bad here... a new trend of killings called as Honor Killings and Khap Panchayats (this is an Indian Term for community groups — usually comprising elderly men from the Jat community) has emerged and they would kill people in love before marriage.

It happens to other culture as well. It is sad to hear stories like this because we are talking about a kid's life, being abuse as an adult is worse but being abuse as a kid is a lot worst. It will taint their memory forever. It will be like a nightmare that will haunt them in their sleep. It is really sad. I feel so mad to the abuser. I hope he will go in jail.It will not pay for the bad things he mad but at least he will not be able to do it to anybody again. I also feel madder about the mother who remains tolerant and in denial with what is going on under her nose. Why would she let her girl kid be bathe by other person? Is she too busy? Every mom, in my opinion should be vigilant about their kids.

It is sad to say but I have never felt comfortable with any many around my daughter while she is bathing. Her grandfather did babysit her while she was a baby and I am sure that he changed her diaper, but I trust him because he is my wife's father and if my wife felt for an instant she could not trust him she would not have let him watch our daughter alone. I changed her diaper once in a while, but not very often. My wife was the one that did that most of the time and also was the one who always gave her baths. Not all men are sick. I never thought anything bad while changing my daughter's diaper, I only thought about getting her cleaned up and a new diaper back on. Most men are trustworthy, there are just some sick ones out there unfortunately.

I don't think it is an exception at all. As paranoid as it may sound...I don't think you can ever be too careful with little girls. The most horrifying thing about it is that you never know who will. Most of the cases that I have ever heard are about the people that are closest to the girls that seem to hurt them. Of course we are not going to give a stranger the chance, but it's the ones we trust that have the chance. It's the one that a mother doesn't think about threatening her child that is allowed to give her child a bath or hold her on their lap. That is the scary thing. Who will...who won't..how do we really know? I have always kept my girls under a heavy check...no matter who is around them...biological or not...good or bad...no matter to me...I still ask questions and check for signs. I don't think you can ever be too careful. There is no age for me to start either...I think about the little girls that aren't old enough to talk or know it's a bad thing. I have always thought that way too. Nothing terrible has ever happened but I have went to great lengths to make sure it hasn't.

Its same in our culture.We do not allow daughters and even boys to bath with any other male when they reach certain age.Its risky.You never know who has what intention and lots of perv out there thats just a sad reality.

That is so sad, and the worst part about it is that is happening everywhere in the world doesn't matter the race, age or culture. Is like people don't have respect for each other. How can you abuse on something so innocent and precious as a child whether they are boys or girls. I have heard of horror stories where fathers, uncles and mother's boyfriends have abused on children. I remember a friend of my mom's, had a similar case. She left her daughter with her father, which was her boyfriend and mind you the fathers child, just for less than an hour to get some groceries. When she arrived back home apparently the father was listening to music and didn't notice that she had walked in. Unfortunately she walked in to a total nightmare for her and especially for the baby. Apparently the father was trying to get the baby to perform oral, immediately she started beating on the father got the baby and called the police. I personally don't know what goes these people's mind, my god that's your child, how sick can you be. When my mom told me that story I broke down into tears and I still do when I hear stories like that, especially now that I am a mother of two small children and if anything was to happen to them, I don't know what I would do.

It was my Uncle that raped at the age of 5 to the age of 7 and then it stopped as my Auntie was suspicious but I did not dare tell as he told me then they would give me away and I would never see my Grandmother or Auntie or any of the Family again I then got raped by a "Friend" of the Family at the age of 12 So it is not just today it is happening, it has been happening for Years but today it is more open I do not believe that the Uncle should have even taken her the Girl was 8 and it was obvious she was scared As for Mothers BoyFriends to this Day I do not get that any Mum could let a Boy Friend near her Girl and then to stand by him This is what makes me angry, the Child never gets believed, do Parents not realize at those ages and even older a Child will not lie, Children tell the truth, but no they rather call their Child a Liar, the Child goes through more abuse just so Mummy looks good and has not done wrong My Ex Husband would not go in the Bathroom when my Girl was in the Bath even though he is her Dad to me that was my Job, even though I knew he would never hurt her I certainly would have never let any Man in the Bathroom with my Daughter or Son for that I wish these Mum's would wake up and take a bit more responsibility, the Children are suppose to be able to trust their Parents, they trust their Parents to show them the right Road to Life, but most of the time now, Children do not know who to trust any more and it makes me sad and very mad

Hi Hardworkinggurl, I am sad to say that I think it may happen way more often than we are even aware of. I was a single mom when I raised my 4 girls and I was raised with the same kind of rules as you were. Still once when I was about 5, we had a male babysitter. He was a teen whose parents were friends of the family. When it came time to put us to bed, he crawled in with me and next thing I know he was touching me. I pushed him away and thankfully he stopped. I told my parents. They did not make a big deal about it,,,at least not in front of me but I will say that I never had a male sitter again. None of my girls ever did either and boyfriends were not ever allowed to get that close to them and not left alone with them. Now with all the single moms, I see so very many of them dating a new guy and next thing you know the guy is being called "daddy" and given all kinds of freedom with the kids. The relationship might last a week or a month.

that is what concerns me when the mom is working and the dad has to take care of the little girl. there used to be a series on tv that the kids watched called "full house" i think that was it. anyway, it was about a father and uncle taking care of a bunch of little girls. i think there was 4 to a little older and young twins. i always told the kids thats just sick. but they said it was just me because of the abuse id had. anyway, thats how my mom reacted with my step dad. she never believed me and held it against me for bringing it up.

I know of such similar cases and it really disgusts me...how can a mother no know? I had 3 girls and a boy and I used to watch them like a hawk! and yes I trust the males in my family...but when came to my children I did not trust no one!

I think it's wrong whatever culture it is! I never really thought about it, and I had a younger sister growing up. I took care of her when she was a baby, but I think when she was around 2 or 3, we had an aunt taking care of her. What happened to this girl is very sad. And uncle or not, relative or not, he should be brought to justice.

I strongly believe that daughters must be protected from any abuse whether by male or female adults. Young girls are easy prey for abuse specially when there's was not enough love and care. Girls are groomed to be mothers of the next generation and must be in all form be free of harmful factors that could effect their well-being. I stand firm on the need for every government of protecting women!

I've read your discussion at I feel sad to the child who is abused and the worst thing is, her mommy didn't do anything to stop such action. I don't have a baby because I'm not yet married but doing this such abusive action is considered to be violating the rights of the child. We, concerned people must stop this wrong doings before any such child will be abused again by these immoral people. They must be put in jail for their actions. It gives the child a psychological trauma and it might put her at risk in developing conditions pertaining to mental health in the near future due to childhood psychological trauma.

I am an "uncle" (both literally--my sister has two children--and 'hyper-literally'--the word's historical root is 'lesser-than father,' and I'm one who WOULD BE a father except that there is no mother yet!) and I understand. Another way to say it: I'm not ANYBODY's biological father, but I'm EVERYBODY's spiritual step-father (the REAL Father being the Father of Our Brother Lord Jesus Christ ... I and several others being the ones who step in to give His Bride the care she needs). So, biologically, people's bodies suspect my body of Earthly intentions regarding anything female (even though such intentions would be sickening to even the most-evil spirit, the body wants what it wants); and, biologically, their suspecting is well-founded. I'm reminded of the woman who--when the male police officer ticketed her for building illegal fireworks because she 'had all the equipment to do so'--she accused him of s@xual abuse (for the same reason).

you watch your girls with a careful eye. I taught my daughter and she has taught hers about her private area and no one touches the body. SPecialy the private area. now adays ya have to be so careful with kids dont matter any more if boy or girl both can be abused. and I hope to heck that uncle got beat up and thrown in jail.

Rules are to help out taking care of the people, specially the weakwer members. But in my family I had a close relation to my dad and loved to embrace him even when I was old and married. I remember when my brother went for his doctorate to the US. We all went to the airport and my father embrased and kissed him on the cheek. This was not done then (40 years ago) but it was done by us with no second intentions. I did not get near my uncle past a certain age though: I knew better. I did not look the way he looked at me and I was still a girl.

I am not aware if there is any such unspoken rule in our culture. I do know that in the past, child-rearing was the woman's job. It's very sad that we cannot entrust our girls in the hands of male relatives. What has our world gone into? I hear in the news sad cases like these. There are uncles, brothers, fathers, even grandfathers(!?) who've been caught abusing little girls. Of course the stepfathers or mothers' boyfriends. They're the worst cases because most of the time, the mother would even side with the abuser!!!!

This is so heartwrenching, hardworkinggurl. It reminds me of my trauma. I went through something like that when I was 11 years old. And did not have the guts to tell anyone till I crossed 20. But by then the damage was done, and I found it very difficult to trust anyone. Now, I am a much better as I know that I am not entirely helpless and I can fight back. But I get so angry when I think of those insensitive mothers who do not bother to fiercely guard their children. My mom was going through a lot of emotional upheaval at that time, but I used to blame her all the same. And what you do in your culture is followed here in mine too. My husband does bathe my daughter but does not do it very often and if it can be done by me, he leaves her to me. I am very suspicious about other people, male as well as female because of my bad experience and I watch my daughter and people interacting with her all the time. I do not want her to go through what I suffered and I always trust my instincts. Here men are perverts and women support them. So it is better to be on guard than let things happen and then repent.

Yes this is necessary to protect the baby for this type of scenes because now this generations children is very intelligent so take care of your child. This type of TV programe should not seen by us also in front of our child.

Hi, hardworkinggurl. I have Hispanic friends that believe the same way you do. Their daughters are not allowed to sit in the laps of male relatives or left alone with them. It is a simple precaution. Things happen sometimes, it cannot be denied. Even in my life I do not think young girls should be allowed to sit in mens laps or to be bathed by men. Even fathers or uncles. Now, many may not agree with me but I think that any man is capable of mistreating a little girl. Not all men do, that is true, but some most certainly do. All it takes is an oppurtune moment, a split second when things can go horribly wrong. Why take the chance. And no, we shouldn't raise our daughters to be afraid of men, just instill in them the basic rules of conduct. No female child should be bathed by a male, or left alone to be looked after by a man not her own father. As some one mentioned already when a young girl is old enough to bath her self then she should bathing herself. All of our young girls should be taught that it is okay to tell on Daddy or Uncle or Brother or Grandpa if he is touching her in a way that is not to her liking. They should be given a voice to alert us when something is not right.