New mother and feeling smothered....
By dorthakay08
@dorthakay08 (68)
United States
January 8, 2011 8:48am CST
I am a first time mom. I just gave birth December 23rd 2010 so my daughter is just a few days past 2 weeks old. My daughter is my husbands moms first grandchild. Since she has been born I have not had 1 week where she is not wanting to come over and see her or people in the family are texting me about her. I am breastfeeding so all I have been doing is feeding, changing diapers, changing sheets/clothes, and so on. It is not easy just hanging out when my daughter wants to feed every 30min to an hour. It just gets tiring having people around even if it is just once a week it is difficult since she is still a newborn. My husbands mom already does not understand that my daughter can not come over without me or go places since I am breastfeeding.
Anyways, are there any mothers or fathers out there that may have felt smothered after having a child?
2 people like this
3 responses
@cbchops (61)
• United States
9 Jan 11
I lucked out in this area with our family. We just happened to live 1500 miles away from them. Both of our parents did come stay with us for a week at a time shortly after we brought each of our girls home though. I think I may have been a little more tolerant during that time since I knew they were going home in a week. I think you should definitely see that your mother-in-law gets the message that you need a little space. If you have a good relationship with her, you could talk to her about it. If you don't, you should ask your husband to talk to her. Maybe you could work out a time each week for her to come see the baby. I would suggest a time that your husband would be home so that he could entertain while you get a little rest. Being a mom is the most woderful thing in the world, but it's exhausting too (especially this early in the game). Hang in there! Enjoy your sweet baby girl. She'll grow SO fast!
1 person likes this
@dorthakay08 (68)
• United States
11 Jan 11
Thank you for your response. We did talk and set up a time one time out of the week and on saturdays if I need help. She still seems to not understand but we are totally opposite people and I guess I don't expect her to understand but to just respect what I want.
I have gotten space this week which I am glad. I have been able to enjoy my daughter a little more than I have been able to.
Thanks for your advise.
@JenInTN (27514)
• United States
9 Jan 11
I bet you are feeling smothered! maybe you could talk to your hubby and tell him you really just need some time to relax with the new baby. I would start with the new grandmother by asking her to do something to help you...then you can tell her not today...I am tired...then you open up the lines where you can be open as to how you feel and what you need at that point.
It's nice to have people around that care and want to help but it can be overwelming sometimes. Take care and try to get some rest.
1 person likes this
@lelin1123 (15595)
• Puerto Rico
9 Jan 11
Well when I gave birth some 33 years ago I bascially only had my sister around because my mom was working. So it was not so bad. She was a big help. She was able to take care of the baby while I got much needed rest. Then I was there for my daughter 4 years ago. She and her husband were living with me and I was there to take up the slack so she could get her rest since she had a c-section and took a longer period of time to recupe. She was grateful that I was there to help out and I was more then glad to be there. If its only one person at a time I don't think its bad but when you have groups of people hanging around for hours upon hours that can be a big problem.
