Surviving with in laws and being true to yourself
By desertsong
@desertsong (94)
Philippines
January 15, 2011 6:25am CST
I have actually lived with my in laws for a year now and I don't get to be comfortable with them. Eventhough I live in their house I always show them who I am, even my terrible side. I don't care if they'd make me stay out of the house because of my attitude. They don't seem to be very friendly individuals at all and my husband's father seems to be avoiding me a lot. I sometimes have a fight with my mother in law as well about my daughter's health because she believes in a lot of things that are not scientifically true. I'm a nurse and I think I know about health better than they do. I don't feel comfortable living with them at all. My husband also has a younger brother who seems to be very irritating who always quarrels my daughter. I really dislike him a lot that everytime I see him my temperature would rise to its limit. But I love my husband and I wanna stay with him it's just that he can't leave his parents because they are old and their house would be empty without him. How would you live in a house that you are not comfortable with?
1 person likes this
3 responses
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
15 Jan 11
Hi Desertsong,
Sounds like this is one household that would be better off being empty! I think you and your husband should find a place of your own because his parents are old and don't need all this fighting and stress in their lives. It's THEIR home and they have earned the right to have some peace. Even if you and your husband left, it doesn't sound as if they'd be too lonely. They have each other and another son, right? They might not be as bothered by you and your husband moving out as your husband thinks they would. How old are they anyway? I ask because you say he has a younger brother who argues with your daughter which makes me think they aren't all that old.
@desertsong (94)
• Philippines
16 Jan 11
His parents are both in their 60s already. His younger brother is actually an adopted child who is 6 years old. Very annoying one and always does things to irritate me and steals things from my room. I just keep on hoping that someday things will be better for us. My husband really loves his parents and he hates leaving them. I can't take that away from him. And I just love him so much, I just don't know for how long I could stay on like this. :(
@aralashma (19)
•
15 Jan 11
I can say that it is really hard. My mom experience the same way because my dad is the eldest of all the siblings so they stay with my grandmother. Same as you, or even worse, they fought with my mom and sometimes occurred in violence. After a few months we left the house. I guest you need to talk to your husband regarding this or if possible with your in-laws. It's always better to talk about it than withdrawn to the situation. You might fix this.
@desertsong (94)
• Philippines
15 Jan 11
I have tried talking to him about living on our own but he can't be convinced. I have never told him though that I'm not comfortable at their house. Maybe I should try telling him these days.
@clear2011 (2)
• China
15 Jan 11
Maybe you need to understand them as much as possible or take a good talk with them.:)
