Finding time to spend with each child
By housechaos7
@housechaos7 (609)
January 17, 2011 11:23am CST
Hi mylotters
Do you feel guilty about not spending enough idividual time with your children?I always do and i try to spend family time with a board game etc but it always seems not enough i have 5 kids 3 have multiple disabilities and the 2 without problems always seem to get less time as the others needs are so constant,do you feel this way and have any tips on how to overcome this?
1 person likes this
3 responses
@bounce58 (17387)
• Canada
17 Jan 11
I only have two and still I feel guilty that I don't spend much time with them. Specially the older one. Because the 4 year old demands so much of my time when I'm home, I sometimes feel that I have neglected the 10-year old.
Once in a while, I get the chance to leave the younger one at home with family or friends. I've resorted to taking my eldest son to secret trips. Usually, we'd go to a restaurant that he likes, he picks and just have a snack or a meal. It isn't much, but I think it makes him feel special.
1 person likes this
@olivetree27 (495)
• Greece
8 Jan 16
I love reading your comments as I'm getting ideas on raising kids 
It does make someone special as I experienced when I was a kid. If my mom spent time with me, I don't mind her being with my brother next. I never felt left out even if we were two and I grew up without a dad. I hope my brother felt the same. Since I was younger and a girl, I got most of the attention and it suffocated me a bit. My brother had all the freedom despite having attention too and I was a bit jealous of it. But now, I'm living by myself and bro is living with mom so he has all my parent's attention 
I would love to ask my ten year old if he feels neglected though for me to know if he's feeling a little left out.
It does make someone special as I experienced when I was a kid. If my mom spent time with me, I don't mind her being with my brother next. I never felt left out even if we were two and I grew up without a dad. I hope my brother felt the same. Since I was younger and a girl, I got most of the attention and it suffocated me a bit. My brother had all the freedom despite having attention too and I was a bit jealous of it. But now, I'm living by myself and bro is living with mom so he has all my parent's attention I would love to ask my ten year old if he feels neglected though for me to know if he's feeling a little left out.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
28 Jan 11
I only have two children and neither of my children have special needs. However, I do find that I feel guilty at times that I'm not able to spend the same amount of one on one time with each of my children. My daughter sometimes needs a lot of help with her homework and that will mean that is less one on one time that I have with my son. However, I do think that when it really comes down to it they are getting the amount of special time with me that they need and I'm ultimately the one that is beating myself up over nothing.
1 person likes this
@olivetree27 (495)
• Greece
8 Jan 16
@dorannmwin You're right. I'm sure they appreciate it that you're spending time with them. It's normal for kids to fight for attention but I don't think that it would matter anymore when they grow up unless you really neglect the other one on purpose which I think is not your case. All they will remember is the special time you spend with them. Sometimes, it's just in your head.
@olivetree27 (495)
• Greece
8 Jan 16
I'm watching a reality show about raising kids and there is one family with three year old triplets. I'm observing how the father divides his attention to the three and he's doing a pretty good job. He often brings them out all together and teach them to take care of each other (hold each other hands while walking) and when he gets the time, like for example, someone is awake and the two were sleeping, he would hug him and cuddle with him. I think the two without problems would understand the situation well if you explain it to them and if the three were asleep, you could take them out for a walk. Always ask them about their day as they will realize that you still care about them despite not having all your time with them.
