honest on money with husband?

I guess it depends on WHY you are keeping it from him..If its because you are worried that it may be a slam to his ego, he'll get jealous or angry etc then DEFINATELY keep it to yourself. If you are keeping it from him because you feel more secure having your own stash should your marriage take a sour turn then YES keep it to yourself..I mean its not like you arent putting some of it towards the home when needed ya know. If I were you I would decide/figure out the "why" and THEN decide on the pro's and con's of telling him not telling him..The answer and right course of action will come to you.

im not sure on this one. maybe you should tell but you are saving the spare money. i dont know what you are saving it for. he might be ok about it if you tell him its savings.

Are you intentionally keeping it from your husband? I think you better check why you are not telling your husband about it. My husband does not know how much I get, he doesn't really mind since I am the one managing the finances of the family. I guess it depends on the arrangement that you have with your husband. If he has given you discretion on your finances then I guess there is nothing to be guilty about

flagella08, I can see that you are not intentional here and as such, I do not see this as dishonesty on your part. Like you've said, your husband already knows what you are basically withdrawing while the extras are actually inconsistent which I believe would be paid according to the company's overall performance and achievements. Also, it is not as if you are using the money for other purposes that will affect the family's well being nor vices which will affect your personal well being. So, you should not be too mindful. A relationship like yours here is mutual and does not account for every nitty-gritty detail to gain a common understanding between one another. I am sure your husband is not mindful here and much more than you enjoying your work and marriage. I suppose this is what we call "give and take" in a relationship. Take care and I wish both all the best.

hello flange08,my mom to earn double than my dad but will be very much honest that she never ever hide things from him.and also my dad will be thankful to her that she is helping him a lot in financial issues. but my mom never told about the wages to others,that is why there is no problem between them. i suggest you that tell him about your wages and never ever talk again about it in any situations,if you repeat it to other than your husband there will be certainly a problem.

greetings! would telling him now do you any good? would it significantly affect your relationship? if not, then why bother telling him. you're not doing anything hurtful to anyone. if i were you, i'll keep quiet about it since not telling him would not change anything. just keeping thing simple for both of you.

The secrecy may seem like a good idea to you now, for whatever reason. But in the future it may blow up in your face. What will you do if there is an unexpected set of expenses, or if your husband all of a sudden needs extra money? Will you keep your hidden stash? If you all of a sudden come up with additional money, it may be hard to explain. The other question you might ask yourself is if you would be OK if your husband was doing the same thing to you? Hopefully your answer is yes.

I don't know. On the one hand, it's very important to be open and honest in your relationship. On the other hand, is there a reason you aren't telling him? I have friends whose husbands would just spend more money if they found out there was money. And in some cultures, it's traditional for woman to set aside some money that's separate.

Your husband is entitled to know what you are doing and what you plan to not arise suspicion from your husband even though he did not know you but surely from friends work together or else, be honest at all times for your household to survive to old

Honesty matters much inside a marriage and this includes money matters. Keeping secret about finances from your husband may backfire on you in the future so for you not to feel guilty, have a talk with your husband and give him the rights accorded to him as your life partner!

I can't understand why you are keeping it from your husband. What is your intention in doing so? Do you think he would feel insecure because you are earning more than him? I am earning more than my husband but it doesn't affect our relationship at all and he knows everything about my earnings and how much money i am putting in our family. If you feel guilty about it, then you should honestly tell your husband about it.

Actually you are liar and dis-honest (sorry but based on your information) you are like that my friend. Thank God that you realized that, the thing is open it to your husband as early as possible before too late. Accept whatever words from him regarding your mistakes, admit it and say loving sorry and promised that you never to do it again. Your husband has the right to know which I assumed that his income has been known by you exactly what he earned monthly. Your action would be save your relationship with your husband. Our prayer is with you... see you around

I wouldn't say its his right to know about it. At the end of the day she made the money, she worked for it and from the sounds of it shes being very responsible and putting it away for any emergencies that come up. So I actually applaud the fact shes responsible and not just blowing it away on things she doesn't need. However because of your guilty conscience I personally think you should tell him the truth if you love him and he loves you he should understand why you kept some money put away for emergencies (if thats indeed what you do but your first post gives that impression.) If he ever finds out himself in the end he may think the worst, such as your planning on leaving, your keeping more secrets and so on. So if hes a truly loving husband and family man then I would think he would agree and be thankful you saved it for those emergencies. Your guilt will eventually drag you down and he will start to notice im sure that something just isn't right with you lately. Your mood can change, your own attitude can change. Sometimes you wouldn't even notice but he im sure will. From the sounds of it the guilt is already building up alot with you otherwise you wouldn't be so open with us, strangers about it.