interfering mother-in law

do you live in one roof with her ? if you do, my only suggestion is to live separate house with your mother in law.

I haven't been in that situation and I think I never will be. My mother-in-law is a real angel and she's very good to me. I guess what I can tell you is try to give the "reverse psychology" approach. Try to be extra nice to her. If you get into her heart then it's smooth sailing from there.

Hi, sorry to hear the family problem of yours. Is your mother-in-law always the same before you get married? I mean is she just this kind of person like to take in charge of everything? Is she living with you two now? Well, i think she must be afraid of her own daughter can't do well at home, so she contiune to give advices. Are you just got married not long before? If so, then she must be afraid her daughter have no experiences in household. If not, i think she maybe in her turn of life. So i think you should try to understand her. Anyway, i think maybe she sounds too nagging, but her intention is not bad. And she is your wife's mother, so you should try to have a good talk with her, to find the problem and solve it.

At least you and your wife are in agreement that your mother in law is interfering where she is not needed. Sometimes it is good to be blunt once or twice just to get the message across. Sure it will gave a shock to your mother in law but as long as you and your wife continue to show love to her she would understood, I hope.

Actually it is not right that mother in-law allow in any position between the couples there are two possible result bad or good. In your case I think it is normal that most of the in-laws are like that, because they want their children in a security fence, in a safe place which they did not see the possible effect on that. So the best thing you do is talk to her democratically and tell your side if not talk to your wife in this regard. I'm lucky that my in-laws never interfer any situation in our family... see you around

For me, it would be best if your wife will talk to her mother about that. She should tell her that she appreciates her being concerned to the family. But having already a family of her own, perhaps it would be better if she leaves them to decide for their own. Just talk to her in a nice manner. She will understand.

Keep the respect present when you're dealing with her. She could get annoying but she's also old which makes her more experienced than you and your wife. Respect her suggestions because they might come in handy.

We recently moved back to the UK and I am finding my mother in law is now telling me what I should be doing and what my children should not and not be doing. I have not had any problems with my kids at all and I have managed for 8 years without her so called help and suggestions and I am finding it really difficult to not say anything back to her. It is not a nice position to be in I know, but I am not one for causing arguments so I just try to let it go, even though I am finding that increasingly difficult.

I can't help but think that she just wants you to benefit from her experiences. She has probalby been through the same things you're going through, and wants to try to help you out. What she does, I believe she does out of love. I've been caught in this trap mysalf, except I am the mom. Moms don't like to give up their kids. Once you are a parent, you are a parent for life. It's really difficult to remember that the kids grow up and must make their own mistakes. Moms always want to try to make things easier for their kids, so they give advice based on their own experiences. You all need to find a happy medium. She needs to back off some, and you need to be a little accepting...after all, some of her suggestions may be good. I have, however, gotten to the point where I try to stay completely out of my kids lives, but now they never call or come visit unless they want something, like money. I guess I'm not a good one to give advice to you, either.

Hi! I for myself experienced lots of negatives with my mother-in-law. My husband is the only son so i guess it is the main reason why we are having trouble with his mother, always. I came to a point to just give up the realtionship to stop the argument everytime his mother interferes with my family. I just prayed for the time when things will work as good as it should. I personally speak from the bottom of my heart everything that bothers me and my mother-in-law i think made herself admit her mistakes too. Everything happens really for a reason or should i say many reasons when the topic is about in-laws. One advice i could always share is to speak it out, try to talk to your mother-in-law when the time is right and i know it will help you both release whatever is in your hearts. Happy day to you! God bless you!

I think the best solution in your case is that you and your wife talk to your mother-in-law and explain to her that you don't like her to interfere in your lives;even if this may upset her at the beginning,I think that if she's a reasonable person she will understand your point of view.

You should just let her state her advice, they're just advices anyway. Time will come when she'll leave you alone.

first time very nice question to our mylot friends about how can mother-in-law cam from advice to any time situation family handle me.so i am request this very nice good days friends our lots of respond this thanks you.

Hi, Sometimes our elders, especially in-laws become so preoccupied with the notion that we cannot take good decision and if allowed to take decision, will certainly make mistakes. They think that they have good experience of life and thus they start extending their advices, guidelines, instruction to us irrespective of our willingness to accept and follow them. We have heard that when you marry a person, you also marry with his/her family. Every person thinks from different perspective. Something which you find good can be bad in my opinion. Before extending our help and advice we must consider others' willingness. But people keep offering their advices, instructions, guidelines. We can't stop them. Mother-in-law is the best example of this habit. She has to say something whether the subject is of her knowledge or not. This always creates irritation that why she has to tell us what to do with our house? It is understood and a known fact that she is concerned for her daughter, but in this way she starts stepping on our turf and making herself the head of our home. Actually, we can't stop anyone from offering advice. People do so all the time. What we can do is choose whether to follow that advice or not. Since your wife has more experience in handling her mother, you can take her help. Tell your wife what is annoying you and ask her to strictly tell her mother not to interfere in your house's matters. You can also ask your wife if there is a way that you or you both can tone down your mother-in-law a bit. You can directly, but gently tell your mother-in-law that she is causing undue strain in your life. Most mother-in-laws that interferes have no ill intentions and feel that they are doing you a favor. When you will disclose your uneasiness with her behavior probably she will stop her interference in your life. If this behavior is nipped in the bud right away then there will be no troubles in the future and your life become smooth again. And if all this does not help at all and situation remains the same, you can avoid her by not paying attention to her. With time she will understand that her interference is not welcomed and she should keep distance. Neglecting her instructions will work as an instruction for her. She will feel that her advice has no value and will stop offering them. You can also try this opposite approach -- Start thinking positively. Take her positively. You can start creating a healthy relationship with your mother-in-law by looking at some of the reasoning behind her behavior and responding with compassion. If you will build a warm healthy relationship with her then you will no longer get annoyed by her behavior. Actually, if we like someone then their mistakes appear correct whereas if we don't like someone then their correctness appears mistake to us. Hope you will be able to deal properly with your interfering mother-in-law soon, best of luck.

A mother-in-law may not know that her interfering is something you don't want. she may truly believe she is helping you. Showing and telling her how you feel about her interference may be the best thing that you can do.

I guess all mothers are especially if they are still living with their mother.They are very protective especially if their children are involved.If you are still living in one roof with your mother-in-law it is really hard to make your own decisions.You can't blame them because they are really concerned about their child and they just want to help but we thought otherwise we think they want to run our lives too.The best thing is have your own house and if possible a bit far from them.

Hello there! I guess your mother in law is just too worried about things she shouldn't be. She is interfering because she is worrying too much for your family. The very best thing you must go deep into are the things she is always worry about. Make her feel more relaxed in times like this. Telling her "stay out of this" would simply make her more furious and the demand to stand firmly as the mother would be greater and often times it is uncontrollable. Getting her more involvement is some of your decision makings or even asking her simple suggestions matters a lot to her. Above all, let her trust you. Make her feel that you can stand for any decision you and your wife may have come up with. Good luck!