Depersonalization Disorder... its scary and I do not see the end.

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Does anyone else here know what it feels like to look at your surroundings like they are muffled? Depersonalization disorder is so hard to describe... mostly because it effects people differently, but for me I describe it like im watching tv and everything looks 2D... life happens all around me but nothing feels real even though I know I am alive and everyone else is too, it just doesnt feel that way. I feel disconnected with my own body and my surroundings. I have suffered with this disorder as long as I can remember and I honestly have had maybe 2 episodes that lasted mere seconds where I felt "alive" and everything around me was focused and clear like I know it should be. Anyways I am starting this topic trying to find someone, anyone who knows what I am going through or that has advise on what I can do?