She is a great pretender.....
By hexebella
@hexebella (1136)
Philippines
February 23, 2011 6:45am CST
I am working outside my country and our work place is composed of different nationalities. One of my colleague is an Amerasian, she is actually from my country but holding a US passport. She looked typically pinay (Filipina)and she introduced herself to us to be raised in the states, she can not speak our mother language but somehow can pick up some words if spoken slowly, she is divorced with her husband and has two kids who live with her "ex"-husband in the US. She has good pronounciation of English words but the accent is not like the Amerasian kids who really grew up in the states and sometimes I can notice some grammar error when she speaks like saying "more better".........but still we communicate with her in the English language. Last week she applied for an emergency leave saying that her father in-law died and that she has to go home to stay with her kids as her so called "ex"-husband will attend to his father's burial in another state far from where he lives with their kids. In short, she was given the permission to go and handed over her pending work to one of our colleagues. The other morning I was shocked to hear the news that all her stories were lies as the colleague who relieve her in her post has to access her company email. Her mistake is she used the company email for her personal communications. And it was found out that there was no death in the family, she is not really divorced, she can speak our mother language which is "Tagalog" as the correspondence in the emails were written in Tagalog. What we don't understand is why she has to make up a story wherein we never asked about her personal life. It's not our business if she is single, married or divorced....and why she needs to pretend she can not speak our mother tongue....
9 responses
@summer77 (414)
• Philippines
24 Feb 11
I think she's in a state of in denial maybe trying to impress everyone. But of course, real people are only truly impressed by people with sincere heart. I think she needs to seek professional advice/help to relieve whatever that troubles here about her personality/self. As what the saying goes, "The truth shall set you free!"
@hexebella (1136)
• Philippines
24 Feb 11
Hi summer77!
I agree with you, could be.....that she would like to impress people around her being raised in the US and having a US passport. What she doesn't know, people around her are suspicious even before that someone like her being a US citizen should be in the US and enjoying the benefits of being one as a lot of people are trying very hard to be in her shoes....and yet....why she is here in the gulf region and chose to work here.
There must be a big reason why she has to make all the stories she did and how she can manage to live every single day of her life in lies.
Thanks for responding and happy mylotting!
1 person likes this
I would not get close to a person like this as often they would stab us from the back, too.
@hexebella (1136)
• Philippines
24 Feb 11
Hi jennyze!
Yeah, maybe....she had something traumatic in the past that she would like to escape but it will keep on haunting her.
Someone who is a liar is also capable of betraying the friendship and you are right, these people could have the tendency of back stabbing.
Thank you and happy mylotting!
1 person likes this
@echomonster (2226)
• Greenwood, Mississippi
23 Feb 11
It sounds like your coworker was trying to lead a double life. I wonder if she was planning to run some sort of scam or even steal from the company directly...if so, she would have ample reason to want to conceal her identity. Maybe she was trying to run away from her past in the Philippines and was afraid someone at the company would learn her story. For instance, if she says she's American maybe she figured she wouldn't have to answer curious questions about her family, village, etc. There are all sorts of possibilities...I guess only your coworker knows the truth.
@hexebella (1136)
• Philippines
24 Feb 11
Hi echomonster!
That's a good point....could be that she is trying to run away from something in the past....with us having the impression that she was raised in the states, we will assume that she spent her childhood and teenage years outside the Philippines and no background at all to be traced in the Philippines. Yeah, you're right, whatever mystery is enveloping her being, its only her who knows. But she should be aware that she cannot conceal the truth forever.
Cheers!
@hexebella (1136)
• Philippines
24 Feb 11
Hi Lore!
The same words one of our colleague has said, that she is like a spy, but not a good one as she left traces of uncovering her lies. We really cannot find an explanation of what her real motives are. I was thinking on the divorced issue, she made it in the sense that we will not be surprised or raise our eyebrows in case we saw her or found out that she is dating other men....could be....but on the other pretensions and lies she made, we really do not know.
Thanks for commenting and happy mylotting!
@sais06 (1284)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hi hexebella!
I agree with the above comment that she is a social climber. What a social climber actually feels is insecurity. Yes it's her insecurity that she can't accept who she is and where she came from. I guess she is trying to escape the reality. Sometimes making things up is our escape to reality.
Oh yes I can't judge her right here and then as to why she did that because we might not know the reason or maybe it was needed but an explanation must clarify things why she pretended.
@hexebella (1136)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hello sais06!
Yeah! I believe so. That's another good explanation in analyzing her motives of pretending. She might have some failures in her life and she can not accept the truth. One doesn't have to pretend to be somebody if she has the feeling of security and confidence in all aspect of her life.
One thing she never realized is that she already lost the trust of the people around her whom she made to believe in her show. Definitely it would never be the same with us again, we will draw a line in relating with her.
Thanks for commenting and happy mylotting
@hemlockspruce25 (501)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
What is wrong with being a Filipina? There are many great Filipinos known world-wide because of their amazing talents. To name some there's Charice, Manny Pacquiao, Donaire, Lea Salonga and many more. It seems like she is ashamed of her own country. And perhaps she has a lot to hide. I don't know what she was thinking. Oh well, a social climber.
@hemlockspruce25 (501)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
And something about Colonial Mentality..Jose Rizal will whack her head HARD she'd wish to die. She doesnt know how to look back from where she came from.
@hexebella (1136)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Thank you for your comment hemlockspruce25.
We really do not understand why she did that, we were shocked when we found out. We were only few pinoys (Filipinos) there and we consider her as a friend. She is a nice person and we do not have any complaint about her, not until we found out this shocking truth. When she comes back to work, we will not give her anymmore the trust that we used to give her as she made us all like a fool.
Cheers!
@dainy1313 (2370)
• Leon, Mexico
25 Feb 11
Wooopss!!! I thought I was crazy... but I think that she wins me!!! Haaaaa haha... just stay away from her! She is mental sick... Blessings!... Dainy
@littlepinoy (600)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
You know what, I know a lot of people like that. Even if you do not ask them or do not mention it to them, they just start to open up and tell you something about themselves which you will think as true. It doesnt matter to me actually what they say, I mean at that time, I do not judge them whether what they say is true or not at those time. I just let them talk, not knowing why they open up to me like that. It is just funny when later on, some news will come to you making you realise that what you have heard from such people were not real. I just laugh it off.
I guess by talking first about their so-called situations or stories, we are given the illusion that it is their real life story. We do not care, but we just laugh when we found out that for every ten statements that he shared, eleven of them are lies. hehe.
I've interviewed and confronted one culprit one time. He told me, he is not sure actually. Maybe there is this certain life story that he wants to come true, and in the frustration of not achieving it, he makes up stories that are enough to convince himself that he is enjoying such life, only pretentious.
I really don't know why people who are "compulsive liars" (i call them that) seem to find a home in me. I guess, it is because I prefer to listen than to talk, and becomes too tolerant with their ways. They didn't know that once I learn the truth, I will be despising them.
@hexebella (1136)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hi littlepinoy!
Indeed you are correct. There are a lot of people who make up stories about themselves and yet all are lies. And that saying in our country, out of 10 statements, 11 is incorrect LOL! But you know, I have the character to believe people on what they say especially if they are talking about themselves. I don't want to think people to be liars and this gives me frustration as a lot of people are very good to make stories...I wonder why they don't start a career in fiction writing LOL!
Good for you that you have the ability to detect people who are just making stories. Sometimes it is also good to be doubtful and don't believe right away.
These people do not think that they can not hide the truth forever, it will come out sooner or later. And once the truth is exposed, all the people around them, who trusted them will really hate them.
Cheers and happy mylotting!
@hexebella (1136)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hi JohnMach!
That's another possibility also, as we know that we have a lot of kabayans (fellow country people)who feels superior when they speak English. They don't realize that the tribes in Cordillera speaks English very good and can not speak "Tagalog" (one of the Philippines dialect from where the national language was adapted).
Thanks for commenting and happy mylotting!
