Young mother....I am so afraid for her son!!
By lumenmom
@lumenmom (1986)
United States
February 23, 2011 1:36pm CST
My family is currently staying in a shelter that helps families get back on their feet and find permanent housing. I love the program because they really do care about us and I have met many great families that my family has bonded with and we all try to help each other as best as we can. There is one family that really concerns me: It is a young mother who has two little ones, a 2 year old girl and 15 month old boy. She is also 3 months pregnant. Nothing startling so far, but here's the issue: The little girl has a really bad anger problem.
She is more than determined to get her way about everything and she throws a massive tantrum and destroys things if she does not get her way. That is bad enough, but what scares me is what she does to her brother. There is nothing she won't do to him and she goes after him whenever she cannot get to anything else. I saw her one time push him so hard he landed flat on his back and hit his head on the hard floor. Now he has many scratches on his face and each time I see him he has new ones. My daughter finally told me that the girl takes her fingernails and gouges him in the face. Yesterday his whole head was plastered with toothpaste which she did because the tube was taken from her.
She is very solid and heavy and he is light as a feather and is no match against her. She moves so fast that she strikes before you can stop her. We really are not suppose to handle other family's children, but I cannot help looking out for him when I see her get mad, knowing she's going to go for him. It's getting owrse and worse and I am so afraid she's really going to hurt him. I thought about telling the shelter staff but I am afraid they will call child services but I'd really like them to get the mother some parenting help. My question is has anyone dealt with anything like this before? Do you think it is best to tell?
1 person likes this
6 responses
@ravinskye (8237)
• United States
23 Feb 11
I'm not a child specialist or anything but that sounds like there is really something wrong with that little girl. I've seen some bratty 2 year olds but never as bad as that. What does the mother do? Does she see most of it going on? Does she try to punish the girl when she hurts her brother? I think you could attempt to talk to the mother and see if maybe you could give her some help. If that doesn't work or if the mother flips out and gets defensive you maybe should say something to the shelter staff. Child services might get involved but it might be for the best before something really bad happens to the little boy.
@dfndouble (1)
• United States
24 Feb 11
its not that it is soomething wrong witht the little girl , she is just a product of heer environment . the mother is the one the needs to get a grip. that is the problem with with young mothers , they still haev growing to do themselves . you cant teach someone something you never learned yourself . agreed ? Child service can get involved but i feel like this mother needs to be more of a parent & they wont have to. the child just wants attention
@shia88 (4571)
• Malaysia
26 Feb 11
Hi,
Does the young mother know that her daughter is getting
violent with her own brother?
That is not a good sign ....and this little girl should get a
reminder and scolding from her mother. Be it she is only
2 years old,but she can't be so rough to his brother.
If you are close to them,you can also give her some advices on her
action. Or have a chat with her mother.
If this little girl is not properly train and take care,then her behaviour
will getting worse and worse.
@lizzyt2007 (1312)
• Craig, Alaska
26 Feb 11
yes their young but this is the beginning of sibling rivalry. It will only get worse as they get older. If the mother don't start disciplining them both to teach them this is not appropriate behavior than she is letting them get away with it and it will not go away. I would tell tell the staff that this keeps going on and the mother is not doing anything about it. Would it be o.k if one of them pushed the other down stairs? I don't know if their are stairs. I lived in a shelter once and saw some naughty young children and one almost pushed another kid down the stairs. This happened while their mother was in a another room.
@housechaos7 (609)
•
23 Feb 11
Yes i believe this needs to be dealt with asap and surely the young mum is in the best place to help her manage the little girl and get over the tantrums etc,you must not leave the issue maybe the young mum doesnt recognise it enough to try and cope with correcting it.
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
23 Feb 11
Oh wow too sad. This little 2 year old has the probability of becoming worse if she is not taught to change her ways.
Since she is only two there are ways to turn this around. Doesn't the mom see anything wrong with this. I think you should speak to the staff privately if you do not want the mom to be upset and or if she is in some sort of denial, speak to the staff and maybe they can help provide some counseling.
As she is so young and still reachable.
@sy0712 (155)
• China
24 Feb 11
Say so,for those premarital pregnancy things we are as far as possible to avoid.Because in the life after they may face a lot of problems,money and energy on for women was a big challenge,they don't necessarily have ability to take good care of their children,so it will let their children suffer!
