What are the main causes family problem?
By yspmyl
@yspmyl (3435)
Malaysia
February 24, 2011 1:11am CST
Nowadays, many married couples divorce due to having family problem, some of them because of the involvement of third person. And some of them is due to financial problem.
What do you think that all these problem can really caused a family to break apart?
Why can't these problem be solve till the couple have to end up with divorce?
Do you ever encounter these kind of problem before?
2 people like this
11 responses
@aeiou78 (3445)
• Malaysia
24 Feb 11
Divorce will hurt the children of the couple very much.
In my belief, a problem marriage is mostly started from the financial problem, then followed by the third person.
A quarrel husband and wife can quickly revert to a romantic couple once the situation of the family's financial changes.
Let's bet.
@GloomCookieLex (6073)
• United States
25 Feb 11
Those aren't the only causes of problems in a relationship and divorce does not always hurt children.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
26 Feb 11
There are too many possible causes that can affect the relationship, some of them you might not even ever think about it and it is totally unexpected at all.
@GloomCookieLex I agreed with you, divorce does not necessary will hurt the children because I have friend who divorce with her husband and the child still live happily where she have got the grand parents help to take care of her.
@GloomCookieLex (6073)
• United States
25 Feb 11
Sometimes a relationship just plain stops working and can't be fixed. It sucks, but that's life. I see nothing wrong with divorce whatsoever.
@lionheartguru (208)
• India
28 Feb 11
Ahh i do not see myself mentioning anything of that sort !
What i actually meant is ... if one is so bothered about the consequences of been into a family ... one should get out of the same. In simple words ... PRECAUTION IS BETTER THAN CURE !
Cheers !
@devijay78 (1573)
• India
25 Feb 11
Hi yspmyl. Problem in a family starts only when there is no understanding and tolerance for each other. Those, according to me, are the greatest family breakers. The couple should first try to understand each other. When that is not enough, at least they should tolerate each other's stupidity sometimes. When we learn to understand or at least tolerate, then there will be peace at home and less problematic for both of them as well as the children involved.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
26 Feb 11
I believe what you say is true, when there are understanding between each other, no matter what they do, even if they have done it wrong, the other half will still accept it, but if there were no understanding at all, a small matter will end up with a big argue for fight. So, I think it is correct and quite true.
@sathishkumar3660 (325)
• India
25 Feb 11
Money may be needed to run their life happily but understanding each other is mainly needed. If they have true love between each other, they won't go till divorce and also give and take policy should be there in any relationship. How will their child life end if they go to divorce, they should think about this also.
@marriedman111399 (1207)
• United States
1 Mar 11
In my marriage money is 1 of the problems that I face on a daily basis but also is the fact that I have 3 kids and my wife and I dont agree on a punishment for them. She has her way and I have my way and she gets all upset when I dont agree with her. Another BIG problem in our marriage is that my mother-in-law is living with us and I just dont like it. She tells my kids what to do when I am right in the room and I dont know why. I dont think she thinks I am doing a good job as a father so she has to step in. I talk to my wife about it and of course since she is her mom I am always wrong and me and her get into fights about it. She has said many times that she is so glad that I am home for the night. She is being sarcastic of course. We dont do anything together anymore just the 2 of us because her mother always has to come and that makes me upset that she always has to be the 3 wheel. I have threatened to leave before but have not yet but its getting close. My mother-in-law thinks she can do it all so I just might let her. Then of course my wife will be mad again because I am leaving her with all the kids. I dont ever think I can win at this marriage. Please Help.
@youless (112496)
• Guangzhou, China
25 Feb 11
There are many reasons. Such as the financial problem, it is easy to lead to fight because of it. Especially right now the financial situation seems to be bad all over the world. Also the children's education is a problem because parents will have different views to bring up their children. And therefore the arguments are commonly available. So having a conversation in pease now and then is necessary. The conversation is an important way to solve the disagreement.
I love China
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
26 Feb 11
So, far from what I get most of the answer that causes family problem is financial problem. That mean money play a important role in maintaining the family and also the relationship. It is quite rare in today family that can really survive without having enough money, but if both couple are understanding, they will probably able to overcome it. And, of course, like you say, communication is important in the maintaining the relationship. Without a good communication between the couple, there definitely will have arguments occur in the family.
@summer77 (414)
• Philippines
24 Feb 11
Right, there are so many factors that cause family break-up. It could be financial or relationship factor.
That's quite a tough question to answer why it needs to end up with divorce, because it all depends on the two couples how they would deal with their problems. I think, when problems are there, the atmosphere will be filled by pressure. that is when the they realize they need space to think and contemplate. It's quite hard, but there really couples who just agree to end up everything & there are those who still want to work it out. In the end, trials are to measure the patience and understanding of the lovers. So, I guess, it's a lesson, think again before going through... It's always better to have yourself prepared and ready to settle before going through..
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
25 Feb 11
I think a relationship will change the status from love towards responsibility from courting to after married. During courting love will cover everything, any mistake or dissatisfaction will not be blame, but after married, any little things can became an issue of the family and argument always started because of a small and non important things. I think understanding is very important for married couple and the family .
@jhaidro (877)
• Philippines
24 Feb 11
I have never been in a situation like this since I do not have a family yet. However, the way I see it, the main problem is time. They at times just do not have time for the other anymore. I understand that they have to work hard so that they will have something to put into the table but they also need to understand that the more time that they are away, the more time the lose for being with the person you love the most.
I mean, basically, the reason why you have a family is your partner. You wanted to share the rest of your life together that is why you decided to be tied up. Now here you are together but at times, it doesn't seem like it. No matter how tight things may be, I guess a couple of minutes of showing your affection to your beloved will help a lot.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
25 Feb 11
You are right, when both couple together and have not organize a family, they have a lot of time to spend for each other, but after married, they spent most of their time on work and earning money for the family. And that will definitely neglected the other partner. As time goes by, when a lot of dissatisfaction accumulated and finally it burst into something that cannot be solve and later ended with divorce. This is the saddest thing that every family should avoid. So, we all should try to allocate time for our love one no matter how busy we are.
@thereza (314)
• Philippines
25 Feb 11
My Mother and Father separated when I was 6 years old. It's because of some little things that my Father is easily to get angry. The effects He will hurt my Mother and My sisters, whoever He will see during His act. Not only financial problem can breaks a Family. Sometimes it will end to break ups because We dont know how to accept our own little mistakes that will trigger to fights. We must know our Limitation. Let love and God remains in your Family so nobody will hurt and end in divorce, victims are the children.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
26 Feb 11
Sorry for to hear about your situation. I have a friend where his father are also like to hurt his mom whenever his father got drunk. His father is a really nice person when he is normal, but he became a totally a different person after he got drunk, and finally, the parents divorced because of that.