Is it okay with you to be a second wife?

hhmm theres a lot of case when it comes to love but for me... husband or wife should only be one... I never imagine sharing him it doesnt mean Im selfish though but it is just so hard if you will be in that situation and pretending that your fine with it will just bring you to loneliness no matter how much money,fame or whatver you have... well I feel sorry for her friend for shes in that situation I just hope whatver way she will choose she will be happy...:)

Ou...I think your friend have to ponder more ! Haste will make her hurt so much , but sometime there's something only love can do , try again or walk away... Finally , the most important is she find out the happy when she beside him :) You shouldn't prevent her , only for her advice :) Have fun !

I think she should not accept it. You know, falling in love is much easier than getting along with. She grew up in a christian country, while the man is from the society which allows polygamy. I am sure there will be some problems rising in the future if they get married. Even she can accept his first wife, what if he got a third and fourth one? I don't think her education and experience let she accept that kind of thing: to service one man with other women.

If she is a Christian, it is very wrong for her to date a married man according to our religious laws. If she is a Christian, she already knows that and moving to a country where polygamy is accepted changes nothing.

I don´t think it is wrong for the women who are brought up there. That´s how it is. But it seems your friend will not be happy as much as I wouldn´t have been happy if my husband had dared look at another woman. She has moral and religious concers, my concerns were of another naturwe. But the question still remains: will she be happy? How about having children with him?

Well i would say it is not okay to be a 2nd wife. He should either be with one or the other. Have a great day

I'll never share a husband with anyone-not on purpose, anyway...and if or when I find out there is another woman I start packing his things and hire a moving truck to deliver them to her house.

It is not OK for me. I will mind to be a second wife. In fact I won't love anybody who is married. So when I have a date or something like that, I will figure it out so that I will know whether I can continute our relationship. If I know this man is already married, then I won't have a relationship with him any more. And if he doesn't tell me, then he is cheating me and I won't stand this. This will totally ruin our relationship and we can't even be friends. If I were your friend, I would leave this man. It is wrong for me that he will marry to another woman since he is already married. Although it is acceptable in his country and culture, but not mine. I am selfish, I can't stand my man loves another. I hate to be jealous and fight one man with another woman. I love China

I would not continue in this relationship unless ALL parties involved were ok with it!

I grew up in a christian country with a high morale on sanctity of marriage that's why it is never acceptable for me to be a second wife. I also pity those ladies who are being taken as a second wife, third wife etc since they are muslims but I know that it is their religion and it is their right. I am not being judgmental to them but instead I am trying to be positive about their situation. Nevertheless, I don't want to be in their shoes that's why if I will ever get married, I will choose someone whose belief is the same as mine to avoid conflicts.

NO THANK YOU! i am a very jealous and possessive person. i do not like to share, i do not like to lend MY HUSBAND! therefore, i will not be the second, nor the third, JUST ME ONLY. ME AND ME ALONE FOR HIM. clear?

Wow, I am a very jealous and possessive woman, so I don't think I ever want to be second is a man's life. But looking at your friend's situation, it depends entirely on how she felt about being a second wife. She must know that when she became a second wife, automatically she became a Moslem and that everything in her marriage will be ruled by Moslem rules which she should understand first before she jumps with both feet. In Moslem, a man has a full right on his wife/wives and that he can divorce a wife just because a wife is not heading his wants/ requests.

A woman should understand another woman's situation because she is already in the other woman's shoe, at aleast half way. I would ask my friend, how would she feel if her husband fell in love with some other lady and then ask her to take it from there onwards based on her answer to your question. An excercise that she can perform while asking her the question about whether she's doing the right thing - stand tall with both your feet alligned on the floor (not in criss cross or any other way) both feet firmly on the floor, take a deep breath to clear your mind out of other thoughts, continue taking deep breaths until you have uncluttered your mind. Now concentrate on the question of whether or not your friend is doing the right thing. The answer should come in yes or no. Whatever answer comes the first time should help her decide. Now back to your question about what would I do if I were in your friend's shoe, knowing the fact that the person I love has a wife I would pull myself back a bit while still continuing to be friends with him. I would first thank him for his honesty and then ask him what was it that pulled him away from his wife. My conversation would revolve more around his wife and his married life than around myself and me. I would slowly make him see himself more with his wife and try to help him work out the situation, what ever it may be and slowly start pulling myself away.

I would have to tell her that she is in a different country and when you're in a different country, there will be rules that are different. She has to look inside herself and ask her self what is more important: the love she has for this man, or her christian upbringing. If it is love, then she should go with her heart and make the change. If her christian upbringing is too important to look over, then she should not talk to the man and move on from that love.

if i were in ur friend's situation i'll surely try to forget that man..and that is irrespective of polygamy and all what we need is a person to live with us and love us and i can't accept or i can't tolerate that love to be shared by many people ...wen i luv my partner truly and wanna live only with my partner then for sure i expect the same thing from my partner...what do u say friends???