If your father have a another woman ?

Hi Hieuhanh, Thank you for letting us know your emotions and sharing this intimate family matter to mylot. First of all, let me assure you that you are not alone, because I myself have felt this when my dad had a relationship with another woman. I was still young then, we are 7 brothers and siters, I was the youngest. When my dad arrives, he would always be drunk and could be noticable with another woman's scent. My mom is this kind of angelic and understanding person. She remained calm but very hurt. But what makes everything worst, is my dad finding faults from her and to all of his children--us. He would start to beat up my brother and will count all his efforts and financial support that which we cannot retort because he was the bread earner. He would be very violent and he will have the admiting that he wanted to enjoy his life with of course another woman. It has been going on ever since, he is a typical cheater and my mom will just sacrifice and cry in the shadows. I watch her fall down and gained diseases and heartaches. I am not proud of this. It is shameful, until now when I remember how traumatic our life was, it always makes me cry. When I turned 18, I humbly asked my dad to stop his support for my schooling. I tried to work part time and earn for myself. I notice he was impressed and he had the shame to dictate me of what to do since I have proven my worth. Yes, I can live without him. By 24, I have tried to save quite an amount and started to build my own house. My father was much more silent and he adored my independence. What he did'nt know is I have learned to be a cold stone heart and soul. I became cold for almost all men. I don't have succeful relationships because I am traumatized to commitment. I fear to be married and probably will never do it. Im disgusted with men having children and a wife and saw them with another woman. I have the most negative perception with love. Although I may look perfectly outgoing and happy, the scars and pain of family affairs will remain in my heart, forever. As of your situation, it is a wonderful thing that you and your mom with your younger siter enjoy life without your dad's presence. I wish you will heal in time, and believe me... do not plant gruge into your heart. As I am bitter with love, but love has a lot to offer yet I turn them down. As for that lady, she will have her consequences and karma, and only time can tell. Lust is not forever, it burns and fades away. May her soul be saved with the actions she took and hurt she inflicted with your family. I may be afrevated but how dare she go there and inform about her enjoyment, immoral and unethical. Let her be, she will realize how ugly her life was when she gets old and her feet can't even stand. May her children correct her sins. Take care of yourself, what you can make now is live life to the fullest and be free. Love your mom, all she can smile and be strong about is you and your younger sister. Guide your sister, let her be the best person she can be. With love and prayers :)

life is like a drama, i can feel your condition in this time and i hope it will not happen to my family. i guess your mom is very stronger women because in this situation she always give you warmth of love. For me family is number one. if the problem occurs in my family, may be i will angry and hit my dad but it will not solve the problem. To solve this problem first i'll invite my dad and mom to look back on when they get merried. at which time they promised faithful to each other.next step i would see that women and ask her to not interfere my family. if this doesn't work i will meet with religious leaders to solve this problem.

Hi. hieuhanh. Welcome to myLot. I know how you are feeling. I have a stepmother right now. She is married to my father. She has been for over 25 years now. I felt bad about him moving on with her. But I had to let all of that go. I had to still accept her even if she has done me wrong. I know that it is very hard. Your father should step in and tell this other woman that she should stop disrespecting your mother. That is cruel and very jealous of her. I am sorry that you are going through so much though. I hope that it gets better than what it is now. Take care.

Hi, So sorry to hear about this bad incident happened in your family. But I believe your mother is a strong woman, she is able to handle this matter with open hearts and stay strong. No matter what has happened, just accept the fact and carry on with her life. With you and your sister at her side, I believe your mother is happier enough, although your father has betrayed her. I could not imagine how if this kind of thing happened in my family. For sure, I won't be able to accept it and probably I will hate that woman and also my father. But I am blessed that my father is really a good man, he support our family with his true heart and always give us the best.

Hi, I'm so sorry to hear about your story. I haven't had this problem but if faced with this concern I would talk to my dad and see the reasons why he decided to have another woman besides my mom. The reason why I said this is because Iam a daddy's girl and everytime my mom and dad have fight I always go to my dad and ask. Have you ever tried talking to you dad about this? I know it is easier said than done. Hope everything will be okay with your family soon.

I am sorry that you fall into the category of having a family member who have been a victim of adultery. It is a very sad moment and it really does change the lives of everyone around them. You just have to stay strong, take care of your mom when she needs you and eventually you and your mom will move on from this. It is a very hard time now but I can almost guarantee you that you will come out stronger than before.

This hits me right on the spot. All my life i have this image of my family as perfect, i grew up well, we all went to private schools and i thought we are all happy. But then, i did not know that there is some strains between my mom and dad. Recently, i learned that my dad has been having affairs all these years and have been hiding it from us because he is ashamed to show his true colors and he does not want us affected. I am now 26 and for almost 3/4 of my life, he had been giving my mom pain and i do not even know. I am honestly broken right now, its like the family that used to be so perfect to me crumbled right in front of me. I learned that my dad has an affair and i do even have younger brother and sister!!! for christ's sake those kids are the same age as my son and daughter! It is painful and it is breaking my family apart, though my mom is so tough, i know it is hurting her in so many ways because she is deceived and is hiding this burden from me..and i know till now she is carrying it well because she do not want our family to crumble. The thing is she had this written agreement by a lawyer, she made that women and my dad agree not to see each other or else she will file a case against them..it is concubinage... it is hurting for me too because i do not want both parties to feel hurt..but reality is it is hurting all of us.. i do not know when this pain will pass through but i am praying that it will.

A pleasant day to you Hieuhanh, Indeed it is very difficult to deal in that kind of situation. Hearing, seeing and witnessing that your father has another woman. That, you father has another family other than you. As for me, I do not know exactly how I treated the circumstances, that when I found out and discover the situation. That, when my father turn his back away from us and find another woman. That, he did not care at all as to how and what will be the result of his act. That, he did not think at all what this will bring since my other siblings are still young and need fatherly guidance from him. That, during those times, I also saw my mother crying out from the situation. That, my father did not realize what act he has done towards us. But, time make me strong, then I told to myself, I should stand for my siblings and be a sister companion to my mom. Since my father left us and do not care at all to us, I should not bother anymore thinking about him. That, I should be strong for my siblings and stand firm for my mom.

I can totally understand how you feel but the difference is my mom stayed with my dad. My moms job requires her to works in different countries. When we found out about the affair, it was already going on for almost 4 years. My mom was of course devastated, she was out of the country at that time. I totally lost respect for my dad. I did not really like him before but I hated him because of what he did and the worst is he is not remorseful of what he did. It almost seem like he's angry at us for not minding our own business. I told my mom to leave my dad and just look for a guy that will love and respect her but she keeps on saying that she does not want us to have a broken home. So now I don't have any respect for my dad and I sometimes feel angry when I feel sorry for him when something bad happens to him.