What to do with problem friends?

Hello suehan!!! why do feel responsibility for her kids, you don't need to do that when she's of that kind, and why do lend money when she's borrowing for that cause, don't be liberal suehan, just speak out to her that you aren't not going to tolerate her gestures anymore.

What I would suggest is that you have a serious talk with the person and let them know that what you're doing is hurting your family and your friends. Let the person know what they are losing when they have a problem. You tell them and you do your best to help them, but sometimes the only way for your friend to learn is to literally lose it all. If they fail, they will learn, and when they learn they will start to recover.

I certainly wouldn't lend her any money and I would also talk to her about who's responsibility the children are....not your to be sure! I used to have someone that dropped their kids off here all the time to be with my son....I finally told them no more...I said if I had wanted another kid I would have had one!

I usually go to the spa to loosen a little bit. When I'm relaxed I can already think of better resolutions to my problems.

Have such friends really is a bad thing.My way is ,first is to help,of course,if given help, he hasn't changed,then I would choose to relinquish such friends.

Try contacting her husband, or family member? Confronting a problem gambler is difficult unless you have someone whom she does listen to and know how to tackle the problem. Have she chalked up debts? If she is already one addicted gambler, who is having difficulties in giving her children their daily needs, I wouldn't lend her money. Provide the daily needs for her innocent children instead. Is there any child welfare organization that deals with such situation that you can call for help? I hope they can give her a good wake up call that her children are not just "something" she has no responsibilities with.

She really is a problem and I pity her children because instead of taking care of them she's dumping them to your place and go have a good (bad) time. I think she should be shaken. Someone should make her realize that what she is doing is wrong. Wasting money at gambling places and clubs is not clean fun especially if you have kids to take care of. Doing those things occasionally to wind up is okay but if it's becoming a habit then it's bad. How to tell her is a big problem because you don't know how she would react. Most of the time people like that don't take it well when they are told that what they are doing is wrong. Do you know of anyone to whom she would listen to? If you do, then I think you should seek his/her help because this person is the best person to tell her wrong doings. But, if you think she will listen to you then by all means talk to her the soonest possible time before she gets drowned in all her debts. I strongly believe that she's borrowing money from many people here and there just so she can have money to gamble with.

Hi suehan1 Your friend is taking you for granted,you need to talk to her,explain to her that she is responsible for her children,they are her first and most important concern,she can not just 'dump' her children on your doorstep to go gambling,her children probably realize that what she is doing with them isn't right,and as they get older they will resent the way she is treating them. Can you afford to give her money? I am guessing the answer to that is no...So tell her you can not afford to give her money,and tell her she needs to ask if you can look after her children,not just assume you will...Stand up to her she is using you..and that aint no kind of friend that you need.. she needs to treat you better,and be a better more thoughtful friend to you..but hey this is just my opinion.. Have a great weekend jojo732

I think you should have a talk with her. This gambling habit of hers is not only affecting her but her children and her friendship with you too. So the best thing to do will be to sit and have a talk with her. hmm about my friends, I don't think any of them have any problems or maybe I can't remember right now.

Confront her. Tell her to grow up and take responsibility for her children, and DO NOT lend her money until she gets her situation straight.