A small little doubt

Hi! This question can stump smartest of the parents Sandhya . You (you means concerned Mom) can simply tell him that as he would grow older he will automatically come to know or alternatively you can tell him that it could be told to him at a later stage.

Perhaps you could start with how the animals do it. Fishes do the fertilization outside the body so it is easy to understand. Then go over to how chickens get fertilized. An egg would not produce a chicken - no matter how long you keep it warm, without the rooster giving chicken seeds to the hen. After explaining this, maybe it is easier to go to talking about the human act. You can describe it as an act of love between a mum and dad. The best thing is to show some pictures of the human anatomy - then you don´t need to describe everything with words. And you don´t need to explain more than the child asks as he may not be ready to know all details. The important thing is that the knowledge comes from a responible adult, and not from playmates who can give a wrong picture of the whole thing. Why not repeat that the whole thing is a miracle, and none of us would exist if God had not created us in such a wonderful way so that we can produce children.

If your son is 10 years old and is studying biology, his book describes the human body and he knows the differences between male and female body parts. You can explain to him in a very factual way, using terms he already knows. We, as adults, sexualize the discussion in our minds and that is what makes it harder to speak to our children. There doesn't have to be anything graphic in what you say. As others have suggested, you might get a book that is specific to this discussion and allow that to guide your conversation. Your son is just looking to you for information... there is nothing sordid to what he is asking. I discussed with my first daughter, at age 9, menstruation to pregnancy and birth control and everything in between. Her younger sister was 6 at that time and her friend's mother was pregnant. She came home and asked me the "where do babies come from" question so, only weeks after the talk with her sister, I did it all again with the 6 year old :) She was actually very interested, even asked intelligent questions, and we got through it. Letting children know that we can be their source of factual and correct information is so important because, as they age, they are going to hear a lot of incorrect things from many sources. I'd encourage you to be honest and open with your son and not make up any stories or use juvenile words. At 10, he's old enough for a basic, frank conversation :) Good luck to you... I know it's uncomfortable but you can do it!

Serve you right for teaching biology to a 10 year old. lol Sort of like putting the egg before the chicken. lol And yes, the chicken came first, just like Adam and Eve did. lol

Dear friend, Dear son you can learn that in coming class, now just score high marks in this class to learn further........ I hope the answers would be able to get much better in other biology books, which could be got from better library, may be the Son could given a book with better elaboration.

Hi SViswan, Just tell him the truth. He is plenty old enough to know. My girls all knew much younger than that. The more honest you are with him, the less he is going to be seeking answers from others who might give him the wrong answers.

Lol that is where the birds and bees come in I guess I guess you would have to explain it as best as you can really I can't even remember how I explained it to mine lol

I read a book on advice for parents that had a good answer to this one. The author explained that when kids ask that, then the parents usually get uptight and if they are trying to be honest they make a mistake in being too detailed. The author went on to say that children really do not want or need to know a complete answer to that question - it is more just attention they are seeking. So it is ok to just say something like "They meet near the place where the Mom and Dad are married!" Don't we wish...lol.

Don't believe for one minute that your son doesn't already know the answer to that question. He just wants to hear it from his Mom. Its up to you to answer his question truthfully because if you don't tell the truth, he will never forget the lie you told. Kids are always smarter (quicker) than their parents realize. Yes he has already heard the answer and talked extensively about it with his school buddys. I should know, I helped raise 4 boys!

Hi SV, Lol, you trapped here? I faced the same question from my five year old son when I was pregnant with my second son (my elder son was five years old that time). He asked differently, how the baby gets into your womb. I said God put the baby into my womb, else what I can say to a five year old. Then how you deal with it dear?

Lol! I’ve been through this very recently when my nine year old girl asked me about periods. I knew I had to tell her the truth so I took an age appropriate book about the subject out of the library, let her read it and made myself available for questions which she had plenty of! I kept it simple and answered everything the way she would understand. She thanked me for the information and never questioned me about the ‘birds and the bees’ again!

LOL.. VERY CURIOUS SON.. I think it will be okay if you will explain him the details (um, not actually the FULL details. LOL) Anyways, he's already 10 and he will learn it soon.. As lilaclady said, better to learn it from you than school grounds or any other people. =)

He is ten years old, maybe can tell him something about how a baby come to the world. In my country ,and in my time ,people think it is shame to tell the thing so that I can't understood it until I was 20,it really made me shame

Oh my gosh, I am so glad that this discussion is still a while away for me. My son is only two and my daughter only a few months, so I think I will be reading these answers very carefully and try to remember them for when the time comes. I'm dreading it already lol.

hahaha, it must be hard when this time comes along, I always think a nice tasteful book and sit down and talk about it and not just leave the book around hoping it will be picked and read...better to hear the truth from Mum than hear it the school ground like I did..

Sweetie, it's time for that talk with your son. If you don't tell him, he'll find out from his friends eventually and you don't want that to happen. He needs to hear it from either you or his dad or even both of you to sit down with him and explain how it all works. He's old enough to be told about the birds and the bees. Good luck!

It is a difficult question I agree! but at the same time you don't want to lie to your young son it's important for him to trust you...so may be you can say...sperm and egg meet when mum's and dad's make love, he may ask about the love making issue...and you can say...for today you got your answer...in another year or so when you are more mature I may be able to answer your question in more details...but for today? we will leave it at that.

Hello SViswan, That depends upon how much your son already knows. He might as well have a few more doubts if he watches more of hollywood movies. Anyways, assuming he doesn't know much, I would have told him he doesn't need a PhD in biology right now, he had better concentrate on physics..!

If your son is asking the question, he needs an honest answer. The question is just how much information does he need right now. That is what you will need to determine. Even a 5 year old can know that a baby develops inside the mother. That could be all he really needs to know. Never avoid the truth with a child. Just don't bombard them with all the details when all they need to know is the simple basic facts.