Do you think Im an irresponsible mother?

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I am working in a far a way place from our hometown, where my mom and my kid lives. I have to work in the city because life in the province is just too hard. I left my son with my mom because i dont want to hire a nanny because of safety issues. Now i lost my job, it has been a month already, and I still dont have the drive to apply for a new one. but im active with my online jobs and some PTCs. i know its not enough but i have every idea i can have to fulfill my dreams for my son's future. I just can get it to work or even implement it due to financial issues. any suggestions on starting up a low cost business?