Why won't we learn from others?
@blueangelwrites (149)
Philippines
March 24, 2011 2:52am CST
A man and a woman, each married to someone else, fell for each other. They knew that theirs was a forbidden love but still they pursued it and when it was getting too much to handle, they both decided to go back from where they came from. Of course, their respective partners don't have the knowledge of where they each had been and both agreed they were willing to keep it to themselves. Of course they were hurting (didn't want to talk about it) and also afraid of taking another blow like, their spouses not taking them back if they knew. Now, why is this story familiar? Why, if they knew they would end up like this, would they ever want or pursue this kind of relationship? Is this about taking a chance at love, the what if's? I'm sure there are a lot of similar stories like this one and most of them ended up in heartbreak, although there were success stories or whatever they were called,but only few of them. If most, ended in heart-wrenching pain and a lifetime of misery, why do we do it? Why won't we learn from others?
1 person likes this
10 responses
@Joeyfish (239)
• United States
24 Mar 11
It sounds like the story of Romeo and Juliet. They were star crossed lovers (meaning they were doomed from the start) who just had to be together. Romeo got banned but still came back knowing the consequences because he was "in love" with Juliet. They both knew it was wrong, but whatever drove them together, being it lust, love, curiosity, rebellious against parents.. whatever the cause they just had to go back.
(This story actually sounds a lot like what is being told in your discussion)
I think people don't learn from others because they believe they can succeed where others have failed. That's how I do things. I just can't take others peoples advice. I have to learn from my own experience so I know how true it is.
@blueangelwrites (149)
• Philippines
24 Mar 11
That's one way of looking at it. You are right. Some people do actually fight for love even if it were against all odds because they want to succeed at it and that love is very important to them. I hope though, we all will try to achieve success without stepping on other people's shoes.
@Joeyfish (239)
• United States
24 Mar 11
Exactly.. If something means a lot to someone they will do everything to achieve their goal. And in this case it's one person going after the other, because they believe that they can succeed. There will most likely be obstacles, and most of the time it is other people. So let's hope they step on the right shoes.
@livecenter (1136)
• Malaysia
24 Mar 11
Nevertheless, people in love are often blinded by their love...They are willing to do anything to make sure that their love lasts, and for that they are willing to take risk and pursue the forbidden love...Sometimes I feel that they need to come back to earth and see how things are planned in life by the Lord...Maybe it is fated that they cannot be together, so accept life as it is...
You can fight against all men in this world for your love, but not against the Lord...
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
24 Mar 11
Why, if they knew they would end up like this, would they ever want or pursue this kind of relationship?
well I doubt very much they knew ahead of time that it would end up like that for starters and secondly...love makes you take chances and sometimes do crazy things..
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
24 Mar 11
They should have known based on other people's experiences of forbidden love
But thats OTHER ppls experiences..sometimes we have to learn for ourselves and more than that, when it comes to matters of the heart we tend to feel that how things have worked out for others WON'T be how it will work out for us..Human nature ya know..
Some would and have said that i should have known better than to get involved with a prison inmate.."Its not goin to work", "he is a criminal you cant trust him" etc etc and to an extent those ppl were right...yes he cheated on me and yes he broke my heart a few times over the yrs BUT there were reasons behind it all and I dont regret loving that man AT ALL...I have been, am and always will be head over heels in love with him and he with me but due to circumstances beyond our control it didnt work out..Thats okay..It was worth every single moment. My husband knows I feel this way as do my kids (yes I dated this man while with my husband)...
So should I have avoided it completely because it didnt work out for others? IMO..NOPE...thats them not me ya know..
@blueangelwrites (149)
• Philippines
24 Mar 11
They should have known based on other people's experiences of forbidden love where the success rate is really low and things ending up in heartbreak should be something to make them take a step back? I guess you were right to say, love makes you take chances d sometimes do crazy things :)
@livecenter (1136)
• Malaysia
24 Mar 11
Love does not know whosoever, let it be someone's wife, or even father of three children...Love does catches us in nature and it is something that difficult to be prevented sometimes...Forbidden love are doomed to fail, and for it to triumph over anything else needs great courage like those of Romeo and Juliet...
@livecenter (1136)
• Malaysia
24 Mar 11
Forgetting some point there, I believe they do not learn from others' mistake because they think they are not those people and sometimes they are blinded by the love they are pursuing of...
Nevertheless, intelligent men learn from his own mistakes, but wise men learn from others'...
@biach17 (196)
• Philippines
25 Mar 11
maybe because LOVE has its own different meaning to everyone. And it is very sad to accept that even though we only have one heart....still we might fall in love with two person at one time. How can it be? It is so painful to learn that the one you love have someone ...That the one you are kissing..is kissing someone else too.... though they know that in time they will end apart...or maybe go together forever ..But do you think they will get happy to know that they hurt someone in their past?
@sweetme329 (500)
• Australia
25 Mar 11
Extra marital affair is a very sensitive issue. It's human nature to commit a mistake and realize it later when it's too late. There are indeed lots of story about such relationships. You cannot control falling in love but once you do one must be able to confess it in front of everyone. Fear in love will definitely end up as a heartbreak. It's beyond anyone's control.
@aprilsong (1884)
• China
24 Mar 11
Hi,well, it is not love, they are doing what should not do. actually, from the beginning, they knew the chances they can be together is very slim. furthermore, even they succeed in being together, they will definitely hurt one or two of others. maybe four of them all will be harmed. that not including their kids. (if they have some kids with their spouses)
Actually, it is a dangerous game. films and stories have informed us so many such stories. but still so many people pursue such kind of "love" desperately. without thinking of the results. i think it is like playing fire. it is better not do that.
@ebuscat (5935)
• Philippines
24 Mar 11
For me yes the one who is doing it is the one who is not humble to your self.
@jennyze (7028)
• Indonesia
24 Mar 11
People like to get what they don't have and think that they might be lucky this time, not like the others. So, besides of seeing how others failed, they would analyze their own as special and have more advantages that the others, thus they might get lucky this time. People like to get lucky and that's why they also bought a lot of lottery.
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
24 Mar 11
Why won't we learn from others? Good question and I often think it is because some people believe that until they experience things in life it will not happen to them.
Matters of the heart have very complicated especially if you involve a third party into your heart. So of course it would be best to end a relationship before starting a new one but I suppose at the moment of fun and lust people do not stop to think about the consequences.
