Grandparents
By MHerman09
@MHerman09 (75)
United States
March 25, 2011 12:59am CST
Ok I am not really looking for advice here but I just need to get it out and want to hear peoples opinions. (I have no idea how to spell that!)
Today my man (Jason) and I had to go to court because his late wife's parents tried to sue us for custody of his daughter. They ended up getting visitation every other Saturday from noon to 7. Jason and I don't feel like that is a good idea because they have really emotionally traumatized her. No matter what we did they still got the visitation. Well after court we went and talked to the people at his daughter's school and found out that they have been going to have lunch with her once a week and told her not to tell us. So now we have to go back to court and hash it out again because even if going to lunch with her doesnt hurt her they are making her lie to us. It hurts because Katy (the little girl) is so upset over this and she is having alot of axiety because of it.
Like I said not looking for advice just wanted to get it out there, but if you want you can leave comments and opinions. :)
1 person likes this
3 responses
@whengcat (1457)
• Philippines
25 Mar 11
Hi! there,
I just want to ask, is there any chance that your family and the grandparents settle this just by getting along fine? I think It would help your little girl to get over her trauma if she see you guys in good terms.
@MHerman09 (75)
• United States
25 Mar 11
Jason and I have tried. They refuse to do it. They have to have control, thats the biggest problem. :(
@MHerman09 (75)
• United States
25 Mar 11
Oh, I know. It hurts me so much that they are doing this to her. I don't care about me or Jason going through this. It is ALL about Katy. All I care about is how Katy feels and how this effects her. She is terrified of these people, it really hurts to see her so upset. :(
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
25 Mar 11
In my opinion, they too have the right to connect with Katy, being her their daughter's child.
What should have been better, is a heart to heart talk with them should be done and maybe try to explain the trauma it would cause Katy. But does Katy like them too? if she does, i think just let her connect with them that way.
For the sake of Katy, maybe everybody should be nice to each other. This is just my opinion though. 
@jazzsue58 (2666)
•
25 Mar 11
This isn't about love, it's about ownership. It'd be interesting to know what sort of parents they were to their own daughter - parents from hell, I'd guess.
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
26 Mar 11
It must really be hell for Kathy whenever they come. I just hope she will survive this kind of arrangement.
@MHerman09 (75)
• United States
25 Mar 11
as i said in the above response we tried being nice to them they just wanna be in control. No Katy HATES them because of all the crap they put her through. :(
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
9 Jul 11
I think you all need to sit down and talk. His late wife's parent's are her grandparents and I feel strongly that grandparents have a very important role in a child's life. I think they do have a right to see their grand daughter. I think it is cool that they get to go to the school and have lunch with her. What is NOT cool is the two of you all battling about this. Why does he NOT want them spending time with her? Why do they feel the need to lie or worse expect her to lie? I don't even understand the court battle. My daughters were always allowed to spend time with their grand parents whenever they wanted. I was a single mom. I never felt the need nor desire to keep them from their grandparents or set up visitaation schedules. I don't understand why you don't want them to spend time with their grandchildren?? Why the battle??
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
11 Jul 11
Oh now I understand. You have real good reason. The school needs to be notified of this so that they don't let this happen. I hope he is taking them to court and charging them for the abuse. If that is what they are doing then they should not be around her or any other children.
@MHerman09 (75)
• United States
10 Jul 11
He doesnt want her spending time with them because they have been abusing her for the past 2 years. There is more to the story now. They abused her and we had a feeling about it thats why we kept them from her. Shes allowed to see her other grandparents whenever she wants but these grandparents we had a feeling about and now we found out they have been abusing her physically and sexually.
