Having a Pity Party

I really am sorry that you've come to this point in life. But I'm going to be honest and blunt with you.. please don't hate me for it. If your doctor says you need the walker, and even deep in your heart you know you need it too.. swallow your pride and throw away your stubborness and use the dang thing before you fall and break your hips or something!! My father in law is in his mid to late 70's and his health is not well either. He does have trouble walking because he's diabetic and has already lost many toes. On top of that he lost his wife a year ago and lives alone in a very large house which he cannot maintain. We know it's time for him to move on... not to a nursing home or anything, but perhaps an assisted living place or at least an apartment where someone else does the lawn care etc. But he's too darn stubborn and nostolgic to move out of his house. Now.. I'm not old or in a situation like either you or my FIL, and perhaps when I get there I'll be just as stubborn.. but as a young person looking into your lives.. I say there's no room for stubborness here. We're talking about your health.. it's important!

I am just recovering from major abdominal surgery and I have found that I feel a little less steady than normal so I have taken to using a stick. I believe that, mostly, it's a confidence thing. It's much more to do with that I feel that I MIGHT fall down (and don't need that just at the moment in case it strains something) than that I actually WOULD. Anyway, I have a selection of very nice walking sticks, one with a fold out seat on which I can perch to rest these rather weakened legs of mine. I haven't yet found the need for a frame but, when I do, I shall be rather pleased to get one with wheels, a place for shopping and stuff AND a seat. I might even feel like getting one of those electric golf-cart things and delight in terrorising the neighbourhood but, really, I hope that by walking a little every day, I shall recover the use of all those little muscles which help us keep our balance. On the subject of balance, I only learned quite recently how important our big toe is in keeping our balance. It sends all sorts of information back to the brain which then tells the appropriate muscles to do their stuff. People who have lost feeling in their big toe (or, worse, lost the toe) have great difficulty in keeping their balance.

Morning Antique, nothing wrong with having a pity party every now and again...I'm sorry you're going through this. there are many days believe you me that I wish I had a walker or cane anything to lean on when I go out sometimes...it was just in the Boston paper the other day how canes are the in thing..I kid you not..hey it's better to be safe then sorry right :)

Hi, Antique! I used to work for a durable medical equipment provider (canes, walkers, hospital beds, etc.) We came across this problem a lot with people who knew they needed the equipment the doctor, or family members, had recommended. The problem was PRIDE! They were embarrassed to admit that they couldn't do certain things unaided anymore. Please use the walker! We all, hopefully, will grow old. Most of us will have some mobility problems. It's wonderful that there are so many devices that can make that easier to live with!

So sorry to hear your health is poor. Maybe you'll feel different about the walker after you get use to it. Maybe you will only need it until your balance improves. My mother-in-law had to use one for a while but doesn't need one now.

My mother is 82 and is recovering from a heart attack so now uses a stick. my sister has a walker as she is physically handicapped. both of them put me to sham by their positive attitudes! lol. I hope your health improves and i wish you all the best for the future.

Good Morning Lady, Sorry to hear that you have to start using a walker. As Catsmeow said it is better then falling! My mom used a walking stick then moved to a walker, but by then she was in a nursing home. She had fallen and broke a knee, the dr.'s said her bones were so brittle that she didn't fall and break it but it broke and she fell. She lived with me until then but her health after that got so bad I couldn't take care of her and 5 kids too! We have a 93 year old lady in our church that uses a walker, and she still drives! So there is hope for you! God Bless!!!

A couple of years ago, when I had problems with my back, I bought a pair of sports bars, the kind that people have when they are execising, and they are great help if you have problems walking. I sometimes only take one of them and switch hands, so that I don´t get too tired. I think I would accept a walker if I had to. I would need it to now, so I wouldn´t need to carry bags from the shop, but so far I´m using a rucksack that helps a lot. I have used a kicksled too, as it is a great help when the roads are icey. Helps to keep the balance and no need to carry bags. Some have put wheels on their kicksled so that they can be used in summer too. Wish you many great walks sith your walker..

I know when I was getting ready to get out of the hospital in January, they wanted me to get a walker because I had a tendency to lean to one side and they were worried about my ability to get around. In the end, I chose not to because I had them twice before after my previous surgeries and after a week or two they were not needed. I didn't have the funds available to purchase one anyway at the time. Now I don't need it any more anyway. I know that if I was walking in a large open area that it did come in handy when I was using it, but I still felt embarrassed to use it. I hope that you are able to become comfortable using it before you lose your balance completely. Have a great week!

My best friend in all the world uses a cane. She has real bad knees and worked for twelve years selling watches at Macy's. Luckily she has finally decided to retire. I have a knee that likes to give out on me when I am walking and I hate it. It scares me so badly. But, when I am with my grandson he always walks right next to me and offers me his shoulder to brase myself on if I need to. See! Kids are worth something. My free walker! We could discuss rental fees if you wish. Hehe

Well, if it is any consolation, I know darn well I'll be with a walking stick or a walker when I get old myself. I have contemplated on that, and yeah, seems there is no getting around old age, everyone is going to one way or another. I am stubborn and although I have imagined myself to be with a stick or a walker, I still don't know how I will handle it when I get there. Lol. Any advice antiquelady?

I Am sorry to hear that! I think I need a walking stick too! but I Am delaying it as long as I can.I was 66 on the 25 of this month and I think I Am still too young for a walking stick! but hey when I go shopping I have to hold on the trolley so I can walk around...I have arthritis on my lower back and is getting worse! So Lady go for your walker and don't feel bad about it! after all you still do your own things at home, you are independent! and a walker is not going to change that! Take care.

I have..but they haven't had to use it all the time. Maybe you could just use it when you are tired. Maybe you could even use it to practice and make your balance better.

I am so sorry Jo that you have these problems. I don´t think it helps much to know that other people have problems too. It´s absolutly reasonable to grunt! One of my best friends used walking sticks since I remember. That did not hinder her from doing all she wanted to do, as it happens to you. We went together to Bariloche in Argentina and I took a picture of her giving a doggybag full to dogs (I would have saved it for us but she loved animals). I never thought of her as disabled because she didn´t consider that mor than a nuisance. I´m uploading that picture of her and those street dogs

I stil have my hubbs cane and walker and ytup use the walker once myself togoto a concert helped me walk and has a seat so I had a place to set too. Wait till a DOc tells ya ya can loose your legs for morre stents might not work!

Bless your heart. I understand. With my health problems, each month seems to bring more things I can no longer do. Balance problems are serious, though. My father-in-law was reluctant to use his walker too. He fell a few weeks back in the grocery store parking lot and broke his hip. Now he's at a rehab place with bedsores because they're not getting him up often enough. Please be careful.

Hey AL~ Don't feel so bad. I have had to use my a cane before and I hated it. I don't like to use it because I am "too proud" and it makes me look older than I am so will suffer instead! I don't have a car and have to walk wherever I need to go. I have a bad knee and now have had swelling in my left foot, but still refuse to take out the cane! I try to get someone to do my errands, but this week I have to go out on my own and I am in terrible pain because now I have a pain in my right side too! I still won't use the damn cane! So don't feel so bad! I am stupidier than anyone and stubborn as they come!

When you ask me about the question of the number of people to use the stick or the walker, I start sweating and worrying about my future. No one know about our future. Since I am still healthy and active to go around without any walking tools as stick or walker, I remind myself for taking care of my health carefully. I hope I never need those walker or stick to help me to move around.

I do not have any one I know having what you have, but for me is to say to be grateful that you are still walking irrespective of what you are using, you can do other things on your own because other people depends to others and maybe others are so selfish to help. Just think of those people who are wishing that they maybe like you. Follow all the instructions your DR gave you and try to exercise a little bit not too much to keep your body ok and get the strenght every day and pray to your god to assist you.

I'm sorry to hear that you had to get a walker. That I can imagine would be discouraging and I would throw myself a small pity party as well. Sometimes we can take these things for granted the ability to just walk on our own. I personally don't have to use a walking aide but my brother who is 22 years old does. He has a few different health problems that he's coping with and recently has started taking seizure medicines and now has to use a walker. It can be discouraging because you want your family and friends to be able to walk without needing aide. Then though we have to look at the benefits it's better to have the assistance than to fall and get hurt and have to possibly have more assistance than if we just did what we are suppose. So have your pity party, invite your friends and family and decorate your walker.