Some Tips, Anyone??

Spoil him with love, he won't care about the material things in a few years and even if you spoil him with toys it will draw him towards materialism and he'll start to love things instead of people. You have the right and the duty to say "No", he might not like it but you are not his best friend, you are his parent. Its a tough job but I know you can do it.

me and my wife have a five year old son, but we dont live with any relatives, my mother nor her mother. i spoiled him because he is our only child but my wife uses tough love. she loves to spoil our son too but when she said no, our son listens to her. when my son wants to do something that i he knows i will allow him and when his mom said no he will obey, but when i am the one who will say no he will cry and insist to get what he wants. my wife raise him like that, yes means yes and no means no. she is tough. but i guess that is balanced one spoiler and one not. i dont like our son to grow as a brat too. but since he is five already sometimes i say no and explain him why no and he understands. so all you need to do is to be tough... though disciplining a child is hard when grandparents are around. goodluck

I think you shall have the same agreement with your wife. Otherwise when you say no but your wife says yes, this will be so confusing for your child. And it will make him get closer to your wife because she is always nice to him. And when you think something is right, and you shall insist your position and don't give in to your child. Let him understand that no matter what, being spoiled won't have any benefits. You don't have to say much when you think he is wrong. He may cry if his requirement is denied. But let it be, he will stop crying since you don't give in. I love China

I have 6 children the youngest has adhd.All i can say to you is if he wants something all the time all you have to keep saying is no, make sure you stick to no other wise when you mean no, he will think you will give in all the time.This is the easiest way other wise you are giving mixed signals all the time, hope that helps a bit.

Hi waterproofpaper, I am no expert but being that I raised two successfully on my own I did not have issues with spoiling. Being that he is 3 you are in the perfect timing to begin applying some changes. It would be my suggestion that you and your sons mother apply the same rules so there is some consistency. Children require consistency so they understand right from wrong in the home. What helped me, although I was a single mother is that when I said no, it never meant maybe it was a no, no matter how much it hurt me to see them sadden by my decisions. So when I had to apply decisions I always thought them through. Giving in gives children a sense that it is okay to always try because they may be lucky most times. Best of luck.

When one is the only child in the family, it's common to see him or her getting all the attention. After all, they are the first child in the family, and first time parents are usually more loving to them. Let your wife pamper him while u can do what u want, just the exact opposite of his mother. It's better to have one side pampering him, than both of u right? U can be stern, strict, and in order for him to listen, it's inevitable to hurt him, never physically or emotionally in the long run.