friend or not?
By akire21
@akire21 (13)
United States
April 5, 2011 10:21am CST
if you're in conflict with someone whom you consider a friend, how humble are you to say sorry?
are you willing to accept your shortcomings when someone would tell you frankly about the things that person has observed about your personality?
what if someone considers you as the closest friend in the group yet you don't feel like it because in the first place you don't really like the person? how honest should you be to tell her the truth?
what should you do if you have already said sorry to that friend yet she still doesn't talk to you? are you to be blamed or is she just too childish to accept your sorry?
i'd like to get your thoughts because i'm currently in a situation where i'm no longer in speaking terms with a person whom i used to call a friend. frankly speaking,she has personality issues like she thinks she's the princess..a brat..whatever you want to call that childish behavior..she used to treat me as her closest friend in the group and i didn't have the courage to let her down and tell her that i don't really like her..in the later part as we became close, i just got used to her personality/behavior..i'm honest but i'm not that frank especially when i know the other person will get offended..our conflict started when she had cold war with one of our colleagues and i didn't take her side, she never spoke to me again after i said sorry..what's the deal with that?
1 person likes this
7 responses
@emochique0712 (37)
• Philippines
8 Apr 11
that kind of person should also make friend of her kind. they'l make a better circle. it's not your loss to have lost a single friend but it's her's. there are a lot more understanding people than her. i've had the same experience and i got myself out of the loop to avoid conflicts. it's better this way.
@vehaileairu (2286)
• Philippines
6 Apr 11
Hi there Akire,
Thats a very good question, perhaps, it would be what's her deal..
We can always say the world is not perfect, as there are some kind of complexisity mixtures of different personalities. There is a great percentage of repeling and undeniable dislikes from those mixtures. Its a great survival concept to just mingle with people whom you always have the best frequency and share the same interest. It would be a waste to retrive a not-so-real person. I believe that person suffers from delusional narcissism. Trying to be friend them means you have to be inferior. I say my friend, it would not be a healthy relationship. You have done your part, you did an apology. Do not worry about people who can never be friends with you. But worry about the people who loved you despite all your mishalfs and mistakes. They will be there through thick and thin, loving them is worth your time and effort.
@michaeldadona (5684)
• Malaysia
5 Apr 11
Many times it happened in my life like what you're experiencing for now and in this case I'll let nature cycle of reconciliation, if any or possible. My personal thought in making my tomorrow life much better than today, I prefer to forget about it completely with the involved person(s) and much better for me to wait another new friends.
What so big about them? and what so less on me? These two (2) questions will be making me keep moving forward in my own world and lifestyle. I can't be anybody else in this world, so do they? Be myself is the key of my life success with the values inserted.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
6 Apr 11
Wow, I don't think in the end she was your friend but there's another thing dear, there are people that just can't forgive. I have a cuisin like this, I thought it was horrible cause she stopped talking but what what I said was true, her mother was meddling in MY LIFE you know, and she stopped, I just asked her to talk to her mom and said that gently, in the most possible way.
Years pass by I heard she didn't speak to her mother for 11 months once, and her little sister for 2 YEARS!!!!!!!! I thought the problem was with me but no, she is the most revengeful human being I ever met. She can really hate people.
This person not only can't forgive you dear, this person probably can't forgive anybody!! I would never not forgive someone that says SORRY, that's the only thing we can do when we make a mistake, who the h*** she thinks she is??
@paulineperez (5)
• Philippines
6 Apr 11
Try explaining to her your opinion and your thoughts about her bratty personality. Even if you don't really like her, do it for the sake of doing the right thing. If she really considered you as her friend, she would at least listen to you. Be brave. If she is really the brat that you said she is, she'd definitely be offended. But at least someone tried to tell her the truth. Now its totally up to her if she's gonna do something about it.
@kateQ636 (10)
• United States
5 Apr 11
A friend for me is someone whom you can trust and be honest with. If you know you have made a mistake, then admit it and say sorry. But if the person is still bitter, then she must have attitude issues. You mentioned that this person has childish behavior. Well, if she is a princess inside their home, let it stay there. I mean when you go out to the real world, people will not treat you the same way your family treat you. She should grow up. Am sure if it's not you, there's always somebody who will open up her mind and make her realize her mistakes and for her to be more mature... If this means not to talk to each other for a while, then its ok. Let's just hope that she will realize soon before she will loose a precious jewel in her life..=)
