Child custody...
By oasis_9
@oasis_9 (831)
Philippines
April 9, 2011 9:57pm CST
Hi fellow mylotters what i am about to share is a bit personal it is about my family i just want your point in on this...
Its about my mom's younger brother's family. He my uncle and his wife got separated due to some unending conflict and probably because his wife isn't satisfied with the life my uncle is able to give her. So she left my uncle and their two young sons. Now after a year without a word or anything she is been bugging my uncle that she want to see her two son, her term is to borrow them to attend her niece's birthday! So my family got the same reaction of course we all felt angry of what she is trying to do. Our life have been peaceful without her and now she is trying to make trouble all because she's back here within the city and she remembered her two son. She's been threating my uncle about her rights with her children because she was their mother. But i become more than a mother to her two kids when she felt! Because i was the one who took care of my cousin when they get sick or when they needed something. While she was out enjoying like she doesn't have any children at all...We figured probably she now have no money to spend that is why she remembered her family. We all agreed not to give nor to let her see her kids because she doesn't deserve such kindness.
She said that she is planning to work abroad to take care of her kids but we no longer care...
So what are your opinions about what we did? we are only thinking of the welfare of the two children. We are aware that they still need their mother to grow into a better individual but we think their mother doesn't fit any qualities of being a real mom to them... And we don't want to lose these kids
1 person likes this
4 responses
@OpinionatedLady (5965)
• United States
10 Apr 11
I know here you would legally be made to let her see the kids once she got it to go to court. She left there fore would not get custody but would be granted visitation. Personally I think if they leave then they get no other chance. It is too hard on the kids to have a parent coming and going all the time. Getting hope up to be dashed later. I know I am seeing it happen to my nieces and nephews. They have very many issues. If you can keep them away from her until she can prove that she is in fact ready to be a parent. Make her prove she will be there and not abandon them again. I have found when pressed those who do not wish to be there will leave.
@oasis_9 (831)
• Philippines
10 Apr 11
good point but you can't blame us for not being able to trust her easily she was able to leave without feeling sorry for the kids the last time. What id she's only saying that she's going abroad not really planning to do so? We would still be left with the kids traumatized again by her immature actions... like what lady's opinion said she have to prove herself that she has indeed changed for her kids. We do really want the kids family to be complete but if she still continues what she's doing then we will do everything to protect the kids...
A year is a long time to be away from your kids without even asking how they are when she went away. And then suddenly reappear for reasons we still can't really say is true...
@OpinionatedLady (5965)
• United States
11 Apr 11
Chances are earned by consistency. If she continues to be available to the kids and if abroad that would mean phone calls and letters then she will earn that chance. On the flip it may be good for the kids to see her and have a closing a chance to emit their own hurts and angers for her behavior. Sometimes this can only be truly done in person.
@obe212003 (2299)
• Philippines
11 Apr 11
legally the mother has every right to her children [especially at a young age], so it is best that you allow her to see her kids to avoid any court or legal interference. the fact that she left without even saying a word is really a disturbing matter on your part, so better find out what caused her to do so... the best option is for your uncle talks things over with his wife and let them handle and decide on their family matters.. an intervention on your part [even if your good intent of protecting the kids] would only cause more matters complicated.. if still there is no resolution or compromise within them, then a third-party or an elder mediating would be an option.. if still no resolution, legal matters could intervene and the eventual custody probably would be on the side of the mother no matter what..
@cream97 (29086)
• United States
10 Apr 11
Hi. oasis_9. I wished that their mom was a real mom to her children, when she had the chance to. She should not have been running around and having fun when she should have been taking care of her two young sons. If she is ready to be a mother then let her be. Don't take that opportunity away from her. Even is she has to be monitored, still let her have time with her kids. She is the mother and she should at least be able to communicate with her kids. However if she has not gotten herself together financially and emotionally, then the kids should stay with their father where they are in a better and a more safer environment.
