Do you think that there are alot of parents that can not say no
By joystick
@joystick (1675)
April 16, 2011 6:54am CST
to their children.I have noticed that there are alot of parents that tend to say no and really what they mean is yes, or the children know that they will say yes in the end anyway.I know a person that keeps giving money to their children, yet they do not pay all their bills, or pay friends that they owe money to.How are the children suposed to know what the value of money is, let alone no means no.It seems that there are some parents that pay their children to keep them off their backs, never think about the people that they owe money to.I would never make a friend wait for money, knowing that i am blowing money on things that should wait until i have to money to spend on those things.
4 people like this
16 responses
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
16 Apr 11
I believe that there are a lot of parents that find they can't say no to their children. Sometimes they are more worried about how their children will feel about them than the responsibility that comes with denying or permitting something for their children. they may not be strong enough to deny their child because they are looking for the same approval from their child that they are trying to give to them.@joystick (1675)
•
16 Apr 11
Knowing that that they are getting behind in all their bills as well, also knowing that they may never get on top of all those bills, i am sure thahat they must realise that sooner or later they will have to keep saying no.I feel that they are getting a child confussed by saying no and then saying yes, how are they to learn for the future.
1 person likes this
@tammy27 (1241)
• Philippines
16 Apr 11
this is my mom. but it's in terms of money, it's all about my brother. she just can't say no to all my brother's wants. i dont know why but even if she can clearly see how my brother has grown into a monster, how be beats me in front of mom, how he bullies my little sister my my 1 y.o son, how he talks to my mom and uses those trash language. he's only 13, he stopped going to school. but still my mom often give him what he wants. one of my best friend once told me "no mother would want to see her child in sadness and pain" but that's not always how it is. sometimes, the children are talking advantage of their parents' kindness just like what my brother is doing.
@sixesburn21 (26)
• Romania
17 Apr 11
That is just a shame.. You should try to keep him on track because if your mother has given up you`re the only one left. Take care of him and don`t hate him it. is just the human nature to accept what gives us pleasure without thinking of the consequences.
@deebomb (15304)
• United States
18 Apr 11
Hello Joy. I agree with you. Parents are so much busier than they were when I was a kid. Not only that there is so much more for kids to have than even when my kids were young. As I watch my daughter and her girls they hound her even when she says no. No doesn't seem to be in their vocabulary. She doesn't always give in but they are persistent. I worry about them when they get out on their own as they have no idea of the value or how much is spent on frivolous items. Every time they go out the door they have to at least have a soda. Parents that don't stick to their no are really setting their kids up for money problems.
@blue65packer (11826)
• United States
18 Apr 11
Yes I know parents who can not say no! Even when the children are adults! I think some people do it because they don't want to let their kids grow up! A lot of today's parents are the "hovering" kind. They don't want their kids to fail and make sure they do good! In the long run it is not good! The adult kids aren't being responsible,they are still being babied and don't have any idea how to deal with life on their own! It is a sad thing but luckliy I know not all kids are being raised like this!
@tigeraunt (6326)
• Philippines
16 Apr 11
hello joy,
seems what you are saying is very true nowadays.
but like what i learned from my mom, always train the child when still young. do not give in to anything that you know is not needed or you cannot afford. inform also that it is important to save. as he/she grows, she will learn how to value money.
have a nice day.
ann
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
19 Apr 11
Saying no to our children is something that is very difficult to do. However, it is something that I am trying to do better with concerning my children. My daughter, especially, was very spoiled when she was small because not only was she our first child, she was also the first grandchild on both sides of the family (as well as my grandmother's only great-grandchild that she had the opportunity to know). As a result of this, Kathryn was never told no until she was over four years old. Now that she is getting older, we expect more out of her and she thinks she can get by without doing some of those things. I have to really control myself to not give in to her.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
17 Apr 11
hi joystick I am sure there are as I hear the little bratty darlings wheedling the mom and pretty soon sure enough junior has his hands
on the toy he was having a temper tantrum over.When my son will little it was just one toy for x dollars and no more. if you whine no toy understans? it did work if I just keep a firm resolve. my mom and sisterr were awful what ever my son wanted they bought for him. shame on them.
@celticeagle (167015)
• Boise, Idaho
17 Apr 11
I think there are alot of parents that don't want to deal with their kids or don't know how and so they will let them do or get away with things a regular parent would not. Some kids have strong enough personalities that they push the envelope and are demanding. Once this type of relationship is started it is very hard to change.
@OpinionatedLady (5965)
• United States
17 Apr 11
I believe there are a lot of parents that of coarse can say no but chose not to. They are the parents saying no is their God given right. They choose not to do it. They choose to spoil and ruin their children. They turn innocent babies into raging monsters who go out into society believing the world awes them everything and wind up stealing, beating and raping at will. Not to be too harsh but this is a pet peeve. I cannot abide lazy parents who would rather give in and give everything then be real parents and teach what life is about.
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 Apr 11
My friend this is an area I truly was very successful with, see when I said no, it did not mean maybe, later it meant no. Consistency was my key in raising my children, one area I noticed when I was being raised that was not continual.
@ohsodianne (433)
• Philippines
17 Apr 11
For my case, my parents do know how to say no to me although I don't really ask them for money when it's not necessary. When I was younger, I remember this time when I really wanted another barbie doll and my mom told me that she had no money. I told her, "It's okay, maybe next time if you have money." I grew up learning that you can't always get what you want and sometimes you do have to settle with what you have. So, I think that learning how to say no to a child is really important. Then again, we have to consider that children grow up and for some, they learn that they can't always get what they want. For others, well, they'll just have to learn it the hard way.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
16 Apr 11
As a parent I am quite strict when it comes to dispensing money to my kids. I've told my kids that money doesn't fall from the sky and they have to satisfy me why they need the money they are asking for when I have already budgetted their daily school pocket money. But I do notice some parents who lavish their children with money that they can ill afford to spare with their mounting debts that are yet to be settled give away freely when their children demand for money. Unfortunately their actions will only spoil the kids instead of teaching them to be monetary wise.
@kukueye (1759)
• Malaysia
16 Apr 11
I guess sometime parents are too busy or too lazy to said no , as long they said yes , the kids are happy and not bug them while they rest in the house.They just too lazy or too tired from work and don want to get involve in their children life.Hence giving them money to waste and making them happy and not seeing the consequence in their future life.
