Long distance relationship advice

Philippines
April 21, 2011 3:38am CST
I've heard a lot about long distance relationship advices, but how exactly do you know if these are the best advices until you actually try them out, right? So, have you ever been in one? I kind of have but it didn't end because of the distance though. Have you ever been in one? If so, how did it turn out? And what advices did people give you? Pass them on!
1 person likes this
13 responses
@jennyze (7028)
• Indonesia
21 Apr 11
Yes, there are many examples of successful long distance relationships, and there also are many advices here on how to do it. I think all of them are true, at least to the writers, as that were what they experienced. But however true they are, it may not work for others, as we are all different in viewing things, in the level of our trust in each other, in the level of patient towards the other, and so on. The point is to try, so when the first way does not work, you can try the second one and so on. As for me, I know myself well that a long distance relationship will never do for me. I tried a couple of times and they lasted only for a couple of months...
• India
21 Apr 11
if either of your partner can compromise to co-exist or both have mutual understanding then relationship can go a long way. celebrate it .there is no better career than this. :-) carreer obssessed people will never know what it takes to be it and their strnght
@jennyze (7028)
• Indonesia
25 Apr 11
What should I celebrate here? That I failed in a long distance relationship? Even with mutual interest, a relationship has to be worked, cannot runs on its own.
• Philippines
21 Apr 11
Yes I am, my husband is working abroad for 4 years now but I am proud to say that we are doing well and going strong. We are very lucky to be living in the era where technology improves almost everyday. And me and my husband are making use of it to make our relationship work, even with the miles between us. So I would say make use of the technology, the cellphone and the internet for one. Talk as much as you can. Be interested in each others activities. my husband and I are using mobile chat so we are pretty connected every second,we talk even when his on-duty. It's crazy sometimes and we both love it. In fact, we learned more about each other when we're apart than we were together. We both are sensitive to each others feelings now more than ever. I guess to make a relationship work, you have to work it out together, not just you alone. it takes two to tango, so they said. And it's true indeed, even if you are so determined to make it work, if the other line is not into it, then I don't think it will ever work.
• India
21 Apr 11
@jorhemkris its good to see that you relationship doing great,it is good that the understanding is mutual. and you are bonding stronger,.Yup its take two to tango . Wish you healthy & happy relationship :-)
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
22 Apr 11
I've been in one and now we've been married for 6 years . I didn't really ask for or take advice relating to my long distance relationship, but the advice I give other people is typically you get out what you put in - and after a certain amount of time, it becomes important to both people to eliminate the long distance part of the relationship. As long as you are able to consistently talk and communicate on as close to a daily basis as possible, long distance relationships aren't that tough. It becomes harder if you are both very busy and work a lot and have a busy social circle - OR if there are circumstances that interfere with your ability to talk every day in some form. Keep in mind this doesn't necessarily mean on the phone, my husband and I met in a game, so we spent a lot of talking in game. We also emailed and used messenger, phone pretty much came last. I'm not big on asking for or taking advice, so far things have gone much better when I have trusted my own intuition and followed my own heart. That is the best advice I'd give someone else too. Trust YOURSELF over other people.
@kwylima (451)
• United States
22 Apr 11
telling the truth..it is hard..you can't still together but them when you get back to the place..both of you are totally different..so if you don't really love him..it will be really hard to keep this relationship. I was far for 2 years and when I came bad..nothing was the same!!
• Australia
22 Apr 11
Hi there, I was in a long distance relationship for a year but it didn't end quite well. I was expecting the guy would come to my place and then we could start our relationship all over again but yea that didn't happen. So, i thought it would be better if i let go. It is very tough to keep up with your love if you don't get to see them regularly. I used to share everything with him but i wanted him to be around me. on the other hand, i had so many proposals lined up that my friends asked me to let go the relationship. But i did not and i stuck to it. At the end of the day, I had to end the relationship. I have heard some great stories about Long distance relationships but as per my experience i am done with a distant relationship. I'd rather have someone near me and get to see him once in a while than have to be in a long distance relation where you cannot even meet each other!
• United States
22 Apr 11
Let me tell you about my long distance relationship. My lover, my bestfriend, my conqueror decided he needed to serve his country. We lived 3000 miles away from each other, spoke as often as possible and ended up drifting apart. Believe me 15 minutes on skype once a week doesn't exactly cool the engines. Anyways we tried and failed. Neither cheated or did any of that we were honest with eachother about what we wanted from life and realized we no longer wanted the same things. Long distance would have probably worked out better if we could have talked everday and seen eachother every once in a while.
• Canada
21 Apr 11
I just had to break with my girlfriend up because it didn't work out.
@maclanis (2406)
• Belgium
21 Apr 11
I have never been in a long distance relationship, and I don't think that I could be either. I would just hate being away for a long time from my boyfriend. So I'm afraid I won't be able to give you any advice. I would just always try to stay in contact, by skyping almost daily or something. You also have to trust eachother a lot.
@pokumon (644)
• United States
21 Apr 11
I was in one for about 3 months the summer between my freshman and sophomore years of college. I got into a relationship the week before the end of school. I had planned to stay with my cousins for a couple weeks after but I decided to stay on campus because I was romantically involved with someone. I talked to him every day on the phone and would IM him a lot as well although my jokes and sarcasm would go unnoticed in that media. I am not sure exactly what we talked about, but I spent that summer drawing a lot. My phone bill came out to be over 1000 dollars (maybe around 1700 the first month) because I had switched to a smaller plan some time earlier in the year. When I switched plans the customer service representative I talked to neglected to mention that they removed me from the free nights and weekends that I was paying for and thought I still had. I mostly talked at night and on the weekends (off peak hours) so I was shocked by that phone bill. I called Verizon up and tried to resolve the issue of the phone bill, but they wanted me to write a letter instead. Skeptical though I was, I wrote that letter and to my surprise the matter was soon resolved. It is a good thing they record all of their conversations. Anyway, I did not mind being in a long-distance relationship because we were always in contact with each other and we weren't in love yet, just infatuated with the other. I don't remember getting or giving advice to anyone else about this topic. I just think it is imperative that you can get a hold of the other person frequently.
• India
21 Apr 11
It does not matter if the relationship is long distance or short distance, what matters is the kind of strength of the pillar it is built on. If you know the person very well, both have the same affection, honesty, commitment and focus towards the goal you have planned for each other, then no distance can change/ break such a relationship. Don't you see a loving, married couple, parting their ways if they don't understand each other after a while; and strangers getting married and living together a beautiful life until they die?
• India
21 Apr 11
I have been in a long distant relationship,so have a lot of my frieds and I have never come across one which has been successful.Something or the other definitely goes wrong.Sometimes the timezone creates havoc but most of the times the insecurities eat into therelationship.My advice would be not to expect much from it however if you are stepping in make sure you and your partner have that solid bond of trust which seldom fails cause only trust nd unconditional love is the only thing that can ave your relation.Along with it do make sure to atleast see each other every one or two month,there has to be a personal touch.
• India
21 Apr 11
Long Distance Relationship . first and foremost part .Love Your Partner no matter what. Never Get into arguments even if you think it's not my fault . Love her and Always try to win your love affection by doing Favors. It's not that understanding has to be mutual .initiate from your side and commit whatever maybe the reason i will always love and support my love. will never ever do things that hurt her .I will never have complains .i will give the enough time and space .
@ckciasigurl (2081)
• Italy
21 Apr 11
me i have a relation ship me in my boyfriend long distance relation ship we were in 1 year 8 months for my experiences... even u have a long distance relation ship u can end up with good some are bad... yes bad... beacause u cannot see them ... u cannot know what they are doing? are they telling the truth? for me... the very important in long distance relation ship is 1st the communication.. even thought u cannot see him if u have a communication u can send sms or call him/her.. the 2nd one is TRUST to one another because this is the very very important in this kind of relation ship