Issues with hubby

I think you need to talk to him. Approach the subject when he is in a good mood..maybe right after dinner, and before he gets on line. It could be he is having some problems he doesn't want to worry you about. Whatever, I think you should try to get him to talk without upsetting him. Good luck to you.

Hi! I used to be in that situation, the only difference is the guy is just my boyfriend and not yet a husband (but we're still together until now for 6 years already!). I also tried talking to him, intercepting him to find time for us, writing a letter to pour my heart out (you may also try write him a letter and put it somewhere where he can see and read it), but to no avail. What I did --- and my last recourse ---- was really a weird thing to do. I try study and gain interest in the games he was playing. I searched the internet, asked friends about the games, and later on asked him personally about tips and some how-to's about the game. Then I played it with him. Sometimes, I try to make him find me playing it --- like when he's about to go home, I would open up the PC ten or five minutes before he arrives and let him find me playing it. Eventually, the online game became one of our bonding moments.

That is so not cool. If you are really talking to him about this and nothing is changing then you might have to really start to put your foot down. My hubby plays his game all the time. I don't mind it because i am usually working. but when it's time for just us, then he always knows when it's time to stop. You have to explain to him that you need a healthy balance

Maybe you could do together, what your husband do at home. If your husband is watching tv, you watch tv. Do not prohibit or scold your husband, because it will make your husband offended. Remain normal, after a long time your husband will understand. You only need to be patient.

Hello Tammymarie and a warm welcome to myLot. This is truly tough and I can tell you first hand. I live with my boyfriend now for almost six years and he is truly a wonderful man. Caring, passionate and trusting. Early on when we first began living together he began playing online games and he would sit there from the minute he woke until way after 2 and sometimes 3 am. It was truly frustrating and I had re-routed my life to be with this great man and no matter how much I sat and calmly spoke to him things got better with online gaming for 3 may be 4 days. It got so frustrating that I even spoke to his mother who of course he is an adult and she is in another state, she would tell me that he was using it as an escape. I could not understand the obsession because he and I were so great together. It got so bad that one day I literally told him the game or me. Now I was not joking or bluffing in anyway I was at my wits end. He had a good balance where he worked and is also an Actor and was doing some theatrical shows but something about while arriving home the game awaited. Long story short his gaming days have not haulted but I can certainly say that he is no longer obsessed with them as before. He may play for an hour sometimes and at times maybe 2 but he knows that it had to stop. I am not suggesting you leave him but what I can tell you is that unless he realizes how this is truly affecting you he will not give it up. I honestly feel it is like an addiction where as they cannot be without unless they understand how it is affecting the two of you. I wish you well and hope you can find a way to get him to understand how this is affecting you/the both of you. Because as long as you are unhappy you both will not be. Wishing you well.

well,tammymarie,sorry to hear that your husband spend so much time on computer games that make you feel so frustated.it's annoying,but i know that games to boy just like closes to girls,the addiction with it just like herion,i know a lot of lovers quarrel on this,i can tell you can endure him playing game a while and even like playing with him together,then maybe you now just join him.but if he really have stress in his work and just vent though the game,then you should support him,man will feel vexed if you nagged often,so should never to be nagged all the time,i think you should come out a lot and leave computer alone,try some delicious that's my favorite and do some physical sports....why not go to gym,i love it ...

I would suggest you to tell him that you are upset with it and explain that you really want to seend some time together when he is home from work seeing you guys don't see all day, maybe a diiner out? a movie? Maybe you can suggest it like how about going for for dinner? Going out for a walk? I guess he wouldn't say NO, maybe your husband is more passive kind.

Disconnect the internet connection without his knowledge discreetly in such a way that it cannot be put right for some time and then see what he would do with his time. He should not get any inkling that you are responsible for it. Good Luck!

I guess you need to approach him and tell him that you felt bad every time he is wasting his time playing and you get no attention from him at all. Be open to him tell him what you really feel.

Try to get his attention by cooking his favorite dish maybe. Then set up a romantic dinner and maybe you can open up the issue again along the course. Try to approach him in a nice way that will enable him to open up to you too. I hope this works....Goodluck!

Men hate feeling like they're nagged, even when that is not what you're doing. They just think it is and it can be so frustrating. I had the same situation with my hubby when we first married. You have to talk it out but your approach has to change, trying to tackle something like that head on when all they do is resist and get defensive is so frustrating. So you have to turn things around so that doing things your way will benefit for them. Unfortunately some men are like 'Well I'm married now' I've caught the fish in the sea for me and i don't have to do anything else. I'd try everything everyone has suggested. Organise some special time for you guys like a special dinner at home. Ask him about his game and try to take an interest in it. Men need their egos stroked a little some times before hand, they need a little gentle coaxing and probing. Get him out of the house and away from the computer or maybe find a hobby you both enjoy.

My husband is a typical gamer. Game consoles, comp games, gaming mgazines. I went into the relationship knowing this. I play games too. It didnt really bother me until we started having kids. The diner thing and buttering him up to pretty much tell him your a jerk for not being there for me did nothing for me. I pretty much just came out with it. not beating around the bush. I told him its upsetting that he wld rather play his game than spend time with me. even if he was playing a game I wld ask him do you want to watch a movie? If he said in a min, I wld give him a few mins and than tell him im starting the movie. Sometimes I wld get caught up in my own thing, like crafts or talking to a friend and he wld come and say im ready to watch the movie and I wld tell him well now you need to wait. I noticed my husband goes in spurts though. A new game he plays more. I have played some games with him to spend time with him and I find it enjoyable. Sometimes I have to remind him that were not kids anymore and we have a fam to take care of and I understand we all need down time. I told him i dont mind you playing a game , but better in moderation and explain how I do things I like in moderation. Really it just comes down too they play the game to escape, when their feeling overwhelemed, tired, restricted,etc. Find your hobby and when hes playing his game do your thing for a cpl hours and than let him know, hey, i wld like to spend time with you. After the kids go to bed thats our time to watch tv and talk or sometimes play a game. Being married you have to work together and be honest and just remember he enjoys games he will have his moments.