Mother's Day and Etiquette

I can vividly remember one Mother's Day when my kids were young and I was in the grocery store, shopping as usual. I ran into my next-door neighbor in the store, also doing her normal, weekly shopping. She said, "Happy Mother's Day" with a bit of a glint in her eye and a sarcastic twinge in her voice. I said the same thing back to her and we both shared a chuckle. The thing was, Mother's Day was always like any other day to me and, apparently, to her as well. If I was "given" the day off in honor of that special day, all it meant was that I had twice as much to do the next day since no one ever thought to take over my chores for the day. I was taken out to dinner or, one year, we all went out to Baltimore's famous "Inner Harbor" to walk around, eat, see the sights, etc. I still had all my chores to come back to. Sigh! I usually spent the day with my own mother and my stepfather would take us all out to dinner. That covered his obligation of whether or not to acknowledge my being a mother or not. I thought he was very clever, too, since I raised my kids practically by myself. My kids were too young to go out and buy me a card or flowers or take me out to dinner so my stepfather made it so both my mother and I were treated well on that day without actually having to say anything. It really doesn't matter to me whether anyone other than my own kids acknowledge me on Mother's Day. It would be nice if my husband would get together with my sons to do something special like going out to eat but, if it were up to him, there would be absolutely no holidays or special days at all. He wouldn't even know it was Mother's Day if no one reminded him of it. My sons usually come over and we all go out to dinner. Well, my sons and I do. My husband stays home because, as he says, I'm not his mother. (Romantic, isn't he? )

I think Mother's day and Father's day and a lot of other days are mainly so that the shops can make more money selling flowers, chocolate, pink teddy bears and stupid ties :-) So I avoid all of them. I also avoid wrapping gifts, as glossy wrapping paper kill little birds and I can't be bothered to get the decent sort of wrapping paper as I can't wrap anyway. Just looks like a mess. Sometimes I'll put it in a white plastic bag and put stickers on it, as both can be recycled in plastic. However, if I were to plan anything for Mother's day, I suppose I'd go for my mother, not just all mothers. Especially as there's no day for me. PhD day for example. And I don't like feeling left out ;-) Getting a baby just so that people can say "Happy mother's day" to me isn't really a good reason to have a baby though. I don't think anyone would be happy with that explanation. "The reason I had you was because I wanted someone to cook breakfast for me once a year". *hehe*

Depends on the year and how I feel. My dad has a fourth wife. I love her, and it is really touching to her, and to my dad. I like to honor my daughter. One year I had a sister in law who was due with her first child just after Mother's Day. I sent her a Mother's Day card that year. She loved it. I do not usually get a card or anything. it is okay.My daughter will say "I love you Mommy" lots of times.She would be the one I would expect to honor me.

Well...when I was younger...I used to homor my grandmother for Mother's Day. I suppose I have always thought of the holiday in a more private manner of celebration. I get to do whatever I want in my house on Mother's day..lol...I even had a little bell that I got to ring if I didn't want to get out of bed. That didn't last long

We love everyone everyday! Why need to celebrate it in certain day only? There should not be a special day for any groups.We should celebrate and honor everyone everyday.

Yes, it's to honor those mothers older than we are, so it's my mother and mother-in-law. Mother-in-law for always being so generous and understanding. For my mother, for being so selfless and bringing me into this world.

I honor my mom, mother in law and grandmothers. Without them I or my boyfriend (i call his mom my mom) wouldn't be here. There is so much that they do daily for both of us that I want to thank them. I do it pretty much every day but its nice to have a specific day to give them honor.

It funny, some guy said that to me before and I didn't even know who he was! What's funnier is I almost said it right back to him! Fortunately I was able to stop myself in time. Happy mylotting!

No one, now.

Mother's Day has never been a huge thing for us because of my birthday falling on or near it. My birthday was always more important. I'd get my mom and foster mom a small gift.. and that was it. The rest of the focus was on me. Then my first child was born the day after my birthday.. 2 days after Mother's Day that year. Well now Mother's Day still is not a huge thing because my son gets all the focus. I get a handmade thingy from the kids from school.. I still try to get my mother a small something.. if I'm lucky I get a small gift which usually counts as an anniversary/Mother'sDay/birthday gift from my husband.. then we focus on my son. My mother in law used to get seriously offended on Mother's Day every year. Hubby tried explaining to her and FIL that it's just too tough for us. Obviously we needed to do something for my son.. some gifts and a party or something. Then hubby had to think of me.. my birthday and my Mother's Day since I'm the mother of his kids.. and then we were stupid enough to get married the week before all this. Well his mother still expected gifts and cards and to be taken out to dinner or something. I consider myself lucky if I get taken out to dinner at some point this month.. I don't know what the heck she was expecting and why she was so offended that hubby wanted to put me and my son first. Personally if I were in her shoes I'd want to put my grandson and daughter in law first as well. She'd had more than 30 years of Mother's Days to herself as nobody in that family had a birthday or any other occasion during the month of May.. all the focus was on her. Though now she's gone so I do worry about hubby missing her on Mother's Day a little bit. I won't blame him.. I still miss my foster mom of course.

Mother's day is an ordinary day for us, i am a mom and i do have a mom and my huby has a mom but for some reasons i do not greet my mom.. or i am not that vocal in expressing my feelings for her... there is just a gap. but my hubby greets me and thats just that. nothing more nothing less.

Actually, the closest thing I've had to a mother is only about 16 years older than me. :) She is a former neighbor. I honor her. Out here, I would like to honor Hatley, if she would let me. That is the kind of mother I would've liked very much. :)

I only honor my mother on mother's day Dawny. No one else. That is the way it work here.

I only say Happy Mother's Day to my mother and my mother-in-law. But the first year after I had my daughter, my mum sent me a Mother's Day card too. I hadn't expected it at all, but I thought it was a nice way to acknowledge that I was a mum too now.

I would always ring my Mum. Often, I would often send a card until I nrealised that the sickly sentimental verses inside were just not written for my Mum. She was not a loving, giving, warm hearted person who was always there for me, she did not understand me and I often felt that she didn't even like me. She was quite violent towards me when I was very young and I guess I never got over that. At some level though I DID love her, simply because she was "Mum". When they were around, I would wish nmy girls a happy Mopther's day with the inference being that I hope they have a lovely Mother's Day with their kids & partners. They used to send me cards spometimes and I would get the occasional phone call but I never hear from my girls now on Mother's Day. I don't know why. So now I just think of my Mum, she has passed away, but otherwise i try to forget it. Sometimes my friend's family do something special for his Mum and I get invited to that. That's quite a nice outing but it always reinforces the fact that my own kids don't bother with their Mum.

Well, I still not adapt myself on this celebration because there is no mother's day before, right? I appreciate people think about this occasions because we can greet our mother and express our love to them even in a small things...a words of greetings coming from our heart and mind...

My mother is the person that I want to be able to honor on Mother's Day. However, since I've been married it has actually been taboo to not go to the in-law's house on Mother's Day. The one time that we were going to go to my mother's house instead, my father-in-law called and gave my husband so much trouble over it that we ended up having to change our plans. In fact, it is so bad with his parent's demands on him that he can't even take me out for Mother's Day to help the kids to celebrate.

Happy Mother's Day, Dawn!!! Hee hee - I'm one of those who would say that to all the mamas that I see around this time . . . sort of like a high five to a fellow mom just for being a mom. Not that I feel obligated, I'm just sort of a geek that way (on any "honoring" occasion). As far as celebrating, on my side, we get together at my parents for my mom . . . my sister and I take care of the whole thing so my mom doesn't have to do anything . . . my sister usually gives gifts to both me and my mom . . . my mom usually gives me a card (oh, my sister isn't a mom yet). On hubby's side, it's usually hubby's sis who figures out what we're doing since it's always up to HER schedule . . . so they say it's to honor me and MIL, but it doesn't feel like for "me" too but that's ok. SIL only gives my mom a gift. My MIL always gets a little unnecessary gift to all the ladies (my other SIL used to be a part of this, but she and family live away, and even she only gave a gift to her mom) - and even to my SIL who is not a mom, but knowing MIL she doesn't want her to feel left out so she says the gift is for being a mom to her cats. And so, Mother's Day weekend is hectic for me/us - for years now. I'm a mom, but I don't exactly feel like it's "my" weekend "yet".

I think I agree with you. I think it should be a personal thing. To honor your own mother (or whoever your mother-figure is), and should not be made into a general thing to be thrown lightly. And should never be made an excuse to fish out compliments fom everbody else. My mother.

In my family we say happy mothers day to each other. I do feel like having to buy a gift or card for all those people is in appropriate. I only go out of my way to honor my mother and make sure my husband does the same for his mom. I dont feel like the whole world should tell me happy mothers day. I think some people need to feel extra special on that day. That being said I dont need the lady from Wal-mart to tell me happy mothers day but I dont mind.