How do you avoid conflict after the relationship is over?

How about... just act like adults? There's no need to keep fighting about Old issues, especially around the kids. Show the kids that you can be respectfull Toward the other parent, give them the best example you can, given the situation.

If there are children involved in my view there is no way to avoid the person in total. I can be amicable. Does not mean I like and or enjoy it, I just try hard to remember my priority which is make sure the children do not see any negativity on my end.

LOL! WITH CHARM...overzealous, pure unadulterated charm! Just love being warm and courteous...amicable and agreeable...it so DISARMS them..and SO defuses the arena of conflict. It's the weapon they least expect...and leaves you feeling good about yourself--as you were in control!

The only way to do this is BOTH parties want to keep it civil. If one wants to fight, it just provokes the other even if they choose to ignore it but one can only ignore the not so civil one for so long. If it were me and if I knew my ex would cause a fight, I wouldn't go to meet him at all or if I had to then I'd have someone with me to help defuse the situation before it even got started. Or if I could, I'd get up and walk away. As my mom always said, "One can't argue by themselves". I'm a fighter, not an arguer. I hate hate HATE to argue!! UGH! Talking about insanity!

personally after a really bad break up I think it's better that you try to end any klind of connection with that person. at least this is what I didi...I see no point in trying to hurt that person or getting revenge,,,,because that person might simply NOT CARE.revenge is simply a waste of energy