Friend became stranger
By yspmyl
@yspmyl (3435)
Malaysia
May 16, 2011 10:20pm CST
I have a friend who are consider close to me from the first day we meet. And at the beginning we have a lot of topic to talk about but recently things became strange that whenever we meet each other, we have no topic to talk about, and that make us like a stranger to each other. There are nothing unhappy things happens between us but we just do not have any topic to talk about.
Have you ever get into this situation before?
What can I do to make it turn back to how it was like before?
What is your view and please share you idea.
1 person likes this
11 responses
@EstiiBabii (685)
• United States
17 May 11
I have gotten into that position so many times that I can't even count them. Let me say that the only way to turn it back to the way it was is to take some time away from the person. Because I think it gets like that is because you and your friend are always seeing each other so the conversation sometimes goes bland. So, give each other space and than after awhile of seeing each other you'll have more to talk about.
1 person likes this
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
27 May 11
Really? I think you must be very upset to be in that situation for many time. This is my first time I have this problem and it make me keep thinking about it. We have been not talking to each other almost a week now and I think is time for me to start a conversation.
@adarshvishwanath20 (101)
• India
18 May 11
I think you guys are following a routine, visiting the same old places when ever you meet eachother. Change the venue, go out for a picnic or a small trip, that changes your mood set & you get to discuss about different things. You can also enjoy the stay there, different food, different people & altogether a different place. If you are reluctant to go out somewhere, again you end up meeting in the sam eplace & get bored. Try this, this will definetly help you a lot.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
30 May 11
yspmyl it happens and I recently was found by my childhood best friend and discovered we both had changed a lot as she is staunch Republican and Iam a democrat. So we just decide to talk about our childhood and the people we both knew and forget about
our differences in politics. after all politics is not all of
life and it should not come between old childhood friends now
days.we just jabber on and on on the internet and email each other.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
31 May 11
Hi Hatley,
That is really nice to be able to meet your childhood best friend. As for me, I have almost totally lost contact with my childhood best friends, but I still having a few classmate in the primary school which we still gather at least once a year. And the number of people are getting more and more because every year there are new member adding up...our children. 
@gloryacam (5540)
• Philippines
17 May 11
Unfortunately, this falling out with friends happens often. Especially when the interests of the persons change to a point where there's no longer something to talk about. Well, if that happens, perhaps what to do is to rekindle the friendship by talking about the past. Unless he/she no longer wants it that could mean he/she no longer wants that friendship revived. Or perhaps find a new interest that's common between you.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
17 May 11
It is very hard to believe that someone can change that fast without any reason. It is really hard to start any topic in the conversation although we do have some common interest but just feel really hard to start a conversation. Maybe something have happened and without my knowledge or someone have talk bad about me and that affected our relationship. I will need some time to find out.
@gloryacam (5540)
• Philippines
17 May 11
Oh. A falling out takes a long time. But, if the change was sudden, then maybe there was something that happened that you are not aware of. Maybe you could ask that friend, or yes, you definitely have to find it out.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
17 May 11
Hi dear, I think the best we can do is always call. Like the person called you now it's your turn, to never forget to be the next. Now if the friend was the last to call we also shouldn't go chasing people around, a friendship is built from both sides, there's one sometimes that don't get that interested, if is that's your case let your friend go, this person is not giving you the value you have.
You can always try once more, but always remember a friendship or any relation is built from effords from both sides, and you won't get hurt.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
23 May 11
You mean call is to call through a phone or call the person's name? We always call each other name when we meet but ever since the relationship turn weired. We became really hard to call each other when we meet. I will try what ever possible to gain this friendship back. It is sad to lose a good friend.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
24 May 11
Maybe, I don't know of course but maybe this person had something that happened.
If you really don't want to give up, how about one last try? How about to ask if you done something wrong? It always worked for me when I had hyper sensitive friends, those types that think the world is out to get them, they always understand this or that that I did wrong...
Calling by phone I meant. The only way we can maintain a friendship is to keep talking to each other, now if only you call, then dear, although you might think this person was your friend and you loved what you had, if you are the only one calling you are the only one carring.
@Oldsix691418 (3872)
• China
17 May 11
I think everyone has to encounter the same thing that you faced.Now the situations of you two have changed,there are few topics between both of you,and it shows that your friend has no difficulties to ask you for help,that's really a good news maybe.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
17 May 11
It is really weired when we both meet and it seem like both of us had never meet each other before and we can just walk pass each other without saying anything as if we both are stranger to each other. That is really weired and I am really upset about that. Most of the time I tried to think about something to start a conversation, but it seem like we have nothing to talk about.
@Oldsix691418 (3872)
• China
17 May 11
I really know in our life such things happen at times.Once I went to county town for something and met my good friend's wife,I greeted her,but she seemed that she never knew me!Then I was aware that I couldn't go to visit my friend that day,of course I never told my friend about that.Maybe we haven't seen more than too long,we are really strangers!Hehe,just let it be.
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
22 May 11
Personally I think this is normal of Friendships, and something everyone goes thru as there will be times you will not be able to relate with some of the same things. If you have been friends for a long time, it could be things might have changes some in the way you feel about certain things. The thing is being able to find things you still have in common to be able to remain friends and leave the other things behind.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
27 May 11
You think that this is common is a friendship? I never encounter this before with other friends but just this time. It make me so upset and think that why things can change so dramatically. Anyway, after a cool down and no conversation between us for a week, I think now is time to start the conversation. Hopefully the situation will get better.
@marapplestiffy (2182)
• Philippines
17 May 11
That happened to me, sadly, we just got to accept that sometimes when we work in different fields or companies the things that matter to us may not matter to them anymore, or what we are interested in are no longer interesting to them, but it can be revived though, find a common interest that you and your friend have and start there...
Though, sometimes in life, we just have to say goodbye...
@feeltheirie (301)
• Philippines
17 May 11
This type of situation happens a lot. I have a lot close friends that are not so close to me anymore. There are times when you realize that you are growing apart. All the things you used to talk about no longer excite either of you. Sometimes nothing is left to say but to stay silent. Sad to say but this really happens. You can try your best to still save the friendship by being inerested to what your friend's current hobbies. Let her know that you are trying your best to get to know her more. In return, she should do the same for you. If this still does not work, i guess, you'll just have to let time run its course and let her go.
However, there are still those friends that even if you do not see them for months, when you them again it's like you just saw them yeaterday. It is still cmfortable to talk about anything under the sun. you do not have to force yourself in engaging a conversation.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
23 May 11
I know that this kind of situation happens all the time, but it is really hard to accept when it happen on me. It is really sad when know that your close friend suddenly became a stranger and when every time, we wanted to talk, it feel weired and that caused our conversation became shorter and shorter. We do have common interest, but just don't feel comfortable to talk to each other. It is really strange.
@cora30 (134)
• United States
17 May 11
Hi yspmyl,i can relate to your topic because i was once had a close friend before who became now a totally stranger for the reason i dont know,we were okay months before i left to new york,and we never got a chance to see each other again a day before i left.so when i arrived here in US,i tried to contact her but not hearing from her anymore .So my advice to you is that,if you did your part already and then still didn't heard anything from your friend,well,just go on with your life and who knows maybe someday your friend will realize that he/shes wrong for letting you go as a friend...so just enjoy life:)
