careless hubby... i have done the sin.
By shibham
@shibham (16977)
India
May 24, 2011 5:06am CST
She was my college mate and in 23 may,2005... she got married. She lives in a rented house with her hubby and 5 years old son. Its almost 4 kms away from my home and she is a teacher in a private school.
1. One day, they three were taking breakfast on table. Suddenly, she came out and began to vomit. The hubby did not ask her anything and went to his office.
2. Last Sunday. He was talking with a man and the son was near him. Eventually, a dog came out and bit the son on several parts of his body and he was badly hurt.
3. Yesterday, It was their marriage anniversary. The hubby returned home at midnight being tipsy and she was crying all the night.
Just three examples of this careless husband and father.
Somehow, She got my phone number months ago and called me sometimes. she told all her problem and feelings to me over phone. Thus she began to express all the privacies of her life regarding her hubby to me as the days passed by... she found that i am caring and supporting her over phone and thats way she began to call me almost daily from last couples of week. she said that she has fallen in my love.
Yesterday. I went to her home to ask the health condition of her son and her hubby was not at home. After expressing all her feelings, Suddenly she dragged me towards her and began to kiss on my face and chest. I became speechless and seemed that i have surrender myself. ( what happened to me.... i dont know}.
Now i am regretting that i have done the sin... i have not ever been kissed by a girl where as this lady is a married and wife of a husband. At night, i apologized to her and she said... its okay. Now she wish to get involved with me more deeply.
Why some hubbies are careless and irresponsible?
I have done the sin... still regretting.... THIS IS MY LADY NO 19.
Share your views regarding this issue.
5 people like this
22 responses
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
24 May 11
Sorry... I did not appreciate this one et all.... Seems you have not yet matured and I feel bad for you. There are many many millions of such families out there and if anyone started to think to take the blame...
Anyways, I am already in too many situations right now - so I will stick to the ligther side -
It is "your" lady 19? 
what about the earlier 18? They were yours too
Have a safe life and get yourself tested medically - you need lots of consultation right now - hope you get some good resopnses that you may be looking out for.
what about the earlier 18? They were yours too
Have a safe life and get yourself tested medically - you need lots of consultation right now - hope you get some good resopnses that you may be looking out for.
@shibham (16977)
• India
24 May 11
Hi mamu
Why to appreciate? no reason either. It just my confession, nothing else and i regret... Be sure, i am still virgin.
No, i am not involved with lady no 18. Its a different story.
Mamu, i know your economical condition but what can i do? I am addicted, you better know. Crazy Shibham.... poor shibham....
@didi... at least you.
Good day to both of you.
Why to appreciate? no reason either. It just my confession, nothing else and i regret... Be sure, i am still virgin.
No, i am not involved with lady no 18. Its a different story.
Mamu, i know your economical condition but what can i do? I am addicted, you better know. Crazy Shibham.... poor shibham....
@didi... at least you.
Good day to both of you.1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
24 May 11
sids
have you had in in mind why this mamu is busy and not online for days?
such a headache and keeps pretending he doesn't have a heart huh....with all 19 girls 
have you had in in mind why this mamu is busy and not online for days?
such a headache and keeps pretending he doesn't have a heart huh....with all 19 girls @thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
24 May 11
Wrong times wrong places... Mamu is in need of those prayers, rituals etc that he denied on one of your posts... maybe some amulet or anything should be the right way for him now... or even a complete health checkup
I am busy providing earning opportunities to these Medical Fraternity here and he is busy funding the Bars... Contrasts for us in a family 
I am busy providing earning opportunities to these Medical Fraternity here and he is busy funding the Bars... Contrasts for us in a family 
@marguicha (222366)
• Chile
26 May 11
Hi,
This is a kind of world I don´t understand. I would not stay with such a husband, but maybe I would not even marry someone like him. And you are very naive to fall for her. She´s the victim type and is not worth having even as a friend as she is acostumed to manipulate everyone.
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
26 May 11
@ shiby,
And you are victim of her being the victim of careless behavior?
@strawberrychocodahi (4818)
• Philippines
24 May 11
You confess with your mouth that you fall for that sin, the question is will you do it again? or will you turn away from that sin and sin no more? God has given us decisions in life and he will not interfere it. You need to just decide what to do, do the right thing or do the wrong thing.
I guess it is pretty obvious that most members here already mentioned their suggestions and opinions. I don't need to tell you what to do, you have your conscience and I don't know if you wanted to break a marriage since the woman who is much irresponsible than the husband is already doing her way to break her own family since she said "OK" only when you talked to her and apologized, she didn't even felt guilty or any ounce of remorse since she even wanted adultery.
By the way, whats that counting for? a collection? for women?
1 person likes this
@shibham (16977)
• India
25 May 11
Hi friend...
No... never. Today, she took a leave and wish to meet me and just hours ago, she called me but i refused to go. I am not to meet her anyway, but still will help over phone and support. I think there is no sin either.
I will not excuse myself if i found myself on adultery, whatever she wishes, i shall resist myself on coming days. She may not have any remorse but i am lamenting. I dont wish to break or devastate their family rather i wish to make all three members happy.
Oh... you have read my other ladies. Its a series of discussion regarding my coming novel. I have posted a link for the first discussion of this series on box no 4.
Have a nice day n thanks for support.
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
24 May 11
ok...you really made me speechless with this one.
Now...you had yourself revealed here.
Meaning to say,you have a heart and you know how to fall in love.
But my gracious goodness ...chaloo phirr this is just a bura mazak right?
Avoid her,i know you are just concern about her.
You can helped her without your personal touch,attachment,and communication.
Talk with her and tell her that it's wrong...ugh! you're giving me headache 
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
24 May 11
you don't have feelings towards her?
i doubt..
okay,i might consider men are men...i don't know
@CTHanum (8234)
• Malaysia
24 May 11
It is getting hot!!
I already state my first ..nope my three first expressions after finish read your story which sounds to me more like a confession~ Then I started to smile when you have become the subject of matter rather than the husband himself. Everyone forgot about the careless hubby~ Regarding that matter I would say that sometimes guys have no sense of sensitiveness. For them there are just small matter. This husband fall into the category of irresponsible guy. But that is not the reason for the wife to find other guy. That is a problem too~ Most of married woman refused to talk about their marriage problems with their husband. They would love to talk about it with others. The bad is if they talk about their problems to other people who is opposite gender. No matter who you are a counselor, a friend etc if you are listening to a girl's problem- married or unmarried woman seriously- like here she told you all her problems, there is a chance for them to fall in love with you. I would like to give you some tip if you don't mind- next time my big brother ,make sure every time you want to help girls/woman, make sure you clarify to them that you come as a helper and a friend not more than that. I don't blame you as it is not your fault and I am proud that you admit and confess it to everyone since you have a good reputation here and it could change others perspective to you.It is hard to do so. Most guys will keep their mouth shut about it because they can't bear with the feedback by others.
I already state my first ..nope my three first expressions after finish read your story which sounds to me more like a confession~ Then I started to smile when you have become the subject of matter rather than the husband himself. Everyone forgot about the careless hubby~ Regarding that matter I would say that sometimes guys have no sense of sensitiveness. For them there are just small matter. This husband fall into the category of irresponsible guy. But that is not the reason for the wife to find other guy. That is a problem too~ Most of married woman refused to talk about their marriage problems with their husband. They would love to talk about it with others. The bad is if they talk about their problems to other people who is opposite gender. No matter who you are a counselor, a friend etc if you are listening to a girl's problem- married or unmarried woman seriously- like here she told you all her problems, there is a chance for them to fall in love with you. I would like to give you some tip if you don't mind- next time my big brother ,make sure every time you want to help girls/woman, make sure you clarify to them that you come as a helper and a friend not more than that. I don't blame you as it is not your fault and I am proud that you admit and confess it to everyone since you have a good reputation here and it could change others perspective to you.It is hard to do so. Most guys will keep their mouth shut about it because they can't bear with the feedback by others.
@shibham (16977)
• India
25 May 11
Hi hanum...
You have addressed me as "BIG BROTHER" ?
Hmmm.... when you put those emoticons, then i thought that you have misunderstood me and there are enough reasons to be as i have done the great mistake of my life. I am guilty, hence you have the reasons to react same.
Well said. Most respondents are ignoring the main issue of that careless husband and criticizing her. I never say that she is right but why she becomes same. As far i know her, i am the second person who has touched her. She was a very good girl but this fraud hubby makes her life hell and like a nasty woman to this world. I cant excuse that hubby.
I dont know why she has trusted me rather than a female friend of her own. she may have reasons but i am ignore about it. Yes, i have said to her already that i am not to meet her anymore.
thanks for your comments on me. My confessions always put me in danger.. i cant hide myself and thats why i am in puzzle often.
have a nice day.
Hmmm.... when you put those emoticons, then i thought that you have misunderstood me and there are enough reasons to be as i have done the great mistake of my life. I am guilty, hence you have the reasons to react same.
Well said. Most respondents are ignoring the main issue of that careless husband and criticizing her. I never say that she is right but why she becomes same. As far i know her, i am the second person who has touched her. She was a very good girl but this fraud hubby makes her life hell and like a nasty woman to this world. I cant excuse that hubby.
I dont know why she has trusted me rather than a female friend of her own. she may have reasons but i am ignore about it. Yes, i have said to her already that i am not to meet her anymore.
thanks for your comments on me. My confessions always put me in danger.. i cant hide myself and thats why i am in puzzle often.
have a nice day.@CTHanum (8234)
• Malaysia
25 May 11
Yeah, here I have my big sisters and brothers as well!
Don't worry I am professional.Ehem~
Like you said everything happened because of her husband. The husband is the main reason why she acted that way. If it getting worst they should find hmm...what we call that..marriage counselors! If only they can afford that. If not they should be someone else like their parents who should consult both of them. Friends?? Just should know a bit not more than that!
Don't worry I am professional.Ehem~
Like you said everything happened because of her husband. The husband is the main reason why she acted that way. If it getting worst they should find hmm...what we call that..marriage counselors! If only they can afford that. If not they should be someone else like their parents who should consult both of them. Friends?? Just should know a bit not more than that!
@minomarimat (372)
• Philippines
24 May 11
oh no. You're in deep trouble. In legal terms, it's totally wrong. here are some questions I'd like to ask you, and I hope to hear from you:
1) Are you married?
2) Are you in a relationship?
3) Do you have feelings for her?
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
24 May 11
hello minomarimat,
1. he is single certified bachelor
2. he is not in a relationship (as far as i know)
3. he can answer that for you 
1 person likes this
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
27 May 11
Stay clear if you don’t want to be dragged to a court or humiliated publicly. Whatever feeling you have for her, there are no ways to keep in touch in this futile relation. She’s just hanging on to you coz she has a beast for a husband and not coz she loves you…she just wants some respite and some fresh air in her life. now the choice is yours if you want to continue or steer clear.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
26 May 11
Hi Shibham,
First of all it was just a kiss and that is it so don't go beating yourself up over this. Instead, learn from it. The kiss was not meaningless,however. The kiss and how you feel afterwards should cause you to pay attention to the situation and take measures so that it never happens again. From the sounds of it, it was she that came on to you. I understand there is trouble in the marriage but it doesn't sound as if the woman is blameless either. Instead of calling you and crying out her problems, she should be trying to work things out with her husband somehow. She is married and has a child and she owes it to her child to either work on improving her marriage or get out from it. If I were you, I would break all contact from this woman at this point. You may not have feelings for her beyond friendship but it would appear that she does have feelings for you.
@shibham (16977)
• India
26 May 11
Hi sid...
I am agree with you to some extend. But i would be happy if you say some lines about that hubby.. why he is careless? why he came at midnight being tipsy where as that was the day of their marriage anniversary?
Yes, she has done everything wrong and i admit it but evaluating the circumstances she was needy of caring human. Perhaps she found it on me and did not hesitate to kiss me. But, yes she has made me derailed for a while as i am in remorse now.
Have a nice day.
@TheCatLady (4691)
• Israel
27 May 11
You need to keep away from her. So far you have only kissed. It's not so bad. It's not a sin, but you could go farther and that wouldn't be right. You haven't slept with her yet.
Her husband sounds like a jerk and she would be better off without him, but as long as she is married, she is off limits to you.
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
30 May 11
They are not careless, friend. They have lack of love and affection to their wives. Because some wives feel very uncomfortable to their hubby...due to violence and lack of care. This is the reason why the lady fall in love with because it seems you care and lovable
@mspitot (3824)
• Philippines
30 May 11
You are good to know your limitation. That is a hard situation to be in a situation like that but I am confused as I read the other comments. Did this really happen to you or this is just a part of you novel? I'm sorry cause I haven't been updating myself on mylot lately because of other things so I can't understand.
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
24 May 11
[b][/b]OH MY AMIGO!
Ahem,that's my first reaction!
It is taking me a while amigo to reply to your post,can't fully write what am about to say to you,oh no!
Honestly amigo,you've done that 'cause you also have feelings for her,I know you do 'cause if you don't,you wouldn't bother to help her out from her family problems. I know you're a kind friend amigo but what you just did is beyond friendhsip that you shouldn't have with her. You are just a human being amigo and you are a man so I understand why you didn't push her away when she kissed you.
But amigo,this is very very wrong!
I know you know it! Take actions now! You still have time to change it,I mean please don't go to her place anymore. Do make a space between the two of you. Think of what might happen when her hubby and her son knows about what both of you just did. And amigo,it is definitely a sin!
Let go of her amigo..it's a must!
Honestly amigo,you've done that 'cause you also have feelings for her,I know you do 'cause if you don't,you wouldn't bother to help her out from her family problems. I know you're a kind friend amigo but what you just did is beyond friendhsip that you shouldn't have with her. You are just a human being amigo and you are a man so I understand why you didn't push her away when she kissed you.
But amigo,this is very very wrong! I know you know it! Take actions now! You still have time to change it,I mean please don't go to her place anymore. Do make a space between the two of you. Think of what might happen when her hubby and her son knows about what both of you just did. And amigo,it is definitely a sin!
Let go of her amigo..it's a must!@shibham (16977)
• India
24 May 11
Hi amiga...
Its said that REALITY IS BITTER THAN FICTION BUT SOMETIMES FICTION IS BITTER THAN REALITY.
Yes, i have feelings to her but not such as you have imagined. I have not ever touched her before yesterday or treated her except like a friend. I know this is beyond friendship and thats why i admitted it as a sin and now am regretting.
Its hard to predict, when we slip on the journey of life and if we have to measure someone, then we should know both merits and demerits and everyone own some demerits and some hide them to prove that they are perfect. I am not saying that i am perfect... now i am declaring myself as the worst guy in this world.
I am not to visit her place any more and will tell her tonight that this wrong that she is trying to come to my life.
Thanks amiga for not getting me wrong. Have a nice day.
1 person likes this
@shibham (16977)
• India
25 May 11
hi amiga.. i have refused such temptation many times as you can read lady no 1 here. But that time, i was fully dominated by my evil passions. She invited me today and also called just an hour ago. Neither i received her call nor plan to visit.
Thanks for your nice support amiga.
1 person likes this
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
24 May 11
Amigo temptations like that of your lady no. 19 is really tempting and you are just I could say the normal guy who can't refuse such temptations. You've made your sin and this time do yourself a favor,do the right thing now amigo.
I'm glad you said that you will no longer visit her..that should be! But please amigo,I hope you will not just say it..do it!
Don't say that you're the worst guy amigo,if you continue your relationship or friendship with her like that..then you can treat yourself the bad guy,haha! Just making you smile amigo! All of us commits sin not just you,ask forgiveness to Him amigo and promise Him that you will take the right path now.
You've made your sin and this time do yourself a favor,do the right thing now amigo.
I'm glad you said that you will no longer visit her..that should be! But please amigo,I hope you will not just say it..do it!
Don't say that you're the worst guy amigo,if you continue your relationship or friendship with her like that..then you can treat yourself the bad guy,haha! Just making you smile amigo! All of us commits sin not just you,ask forgiveness to Him amigo and promise Him that you will take the right path now. @bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
24 May 11
Hi shiby,
What happened is really wrong first the girl should not act like that (having an irresponsible husband is not an excuse to kissed and have affair to someone) second you have the power to push her or tell her what she doing is totally wrong but it seems you are off guarded by her 
You are naturally friendly but this can give you trouble too for the past months you did not sense that he is falling for you?
On my own opinion you should avoid here in a polite way so she will not get hurt and you can avoid troubles too give her thousands of reasons just to avoid her if you want to.
You will be guilty if this is the first time but if you decided to pursue it you will get use to it.
Temptation are all over the place it's a matter of choice to avoid temptation or to enjoy the temptation.
Hope it can help you think
You are naturally friendly but this can give you trouble too for the past months you did not sense that he is falling for you?
On my own opinion you should avoid here in a polite way so she will not get hurt and you can avoid troubles too give her thousands of reasons just to avoid her if you want to.
You will be guilty if this is the first time but if you decided to pursue it you will get use to it.
Temptation are all over the place it's a matter of choice to avoid temptation or to enjoy the temptation.
Hope it can help you think @bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
26 May 11
Knowing you until when you can refuse her invitation what if she will make a stories that she is in trouble and need your help of course you are a Knight and willing to save her
@Zer0Stats (1147)
• India
24 May 11
What happened to you...don't know?
Maaan,you are single,ready to mingle and she is married and with a kid.Why are you blaming yourself for that?
What is sin and what not,don't care! But I think if she were a smocking hottie you'd have taken advantage of that situation.....
You said this is your lady 19? So I thought you are one of the big players but hear what!?! You're still a virgin?
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU,BRUV?
Maaan,you are single,ready to mingle and she is married and with a kid.Why are you blaming yourself for that?
What is sin and what not,don't care! But I think if she were a smocking hottie you'd have taken advantage of that situation.....
You said this is your lady 19? So I thought you are one of the big players but hear what!?! You're still a virgin?
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU,BRUV?@shibham (16977)
• India
28 May 11
Hi friend...
its real incident for sure but a part of my novel too. Other ladies stories are also parts of my novel and in some of them i am not involved. You may check other stories.
Although i did not start but i should protested but was not able and thats why i am regretting now.
take care dude.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
25 May 11
hi shibham she really did co me on to you bu t I sense you are just
a very good friend as she is married, and your morals tell youshe
is forbidden territory now. I agree her husband sounds like a
total jerk and does not do ri ght by wife or his own son. I
still feel until the lady considers he is a jerk and divorces
him, you know what you must do, disabuse her of any romance
between the two of you now. If she divorces him then she will
be free and if you really have any love feelings for her.
YOu really did not sin as she came on to you.Just the way you
describe it shows how really good you are shibham so be easier
on yourself. You sound like a really good decent person.
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
24 May 11
Hi. shibham. When she started kissing on you did you kiss her back? Now if you did, then this is what makes you more of a sinner, if you want to call yourself one. I think that she came onto you more, she was hurting and you was a friend to her in need. It was not like you were checking her out of something. It is sad that her husband cares the less about her and their son. But as soon as another man wins her heart, he will start hanging around more often then. A man like him, usually gets jealous when he sees that his wife is no longer depending on him for love and affection anymore. I am sorry that you are caught up in this love pool, but you can easily swim your way out it too, by not being around her anymore.
@shibham (16977)
• India
25 May 11
Hi cream..
What about lipkiss? If you considered it then my lips touched her face but the force came from her. I am already a sinner and cant excuse myself for my stupidity. If he become careful to his family, then i will be happy. I can sacrifice everything for the happiness of her family but never through such a way. The hubby is totally ignore that she talks with me over phone.
Let expose another one fact. There is a chemist who proposed her and used slang words for her over phone. She complained it to her hubby but he did not show any interest in this issue. So, tell me... i think there is nothing to change him. Anyway, i am not to meet her anymore.
Have a nice day.
@JenInTN (27514)
• United States
25 May 11
Oh my...she sounds like a very needy woman. There are a lot of people that enter marriages and are treated like that. Be careful with that Lady No 19. She sounds like she might be trying to get some attention from her husband and he might not be as welcoming.
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
25 May 11
Hi shibham
I will not lecture the error of having kissed a married woman as I see you understood it was wrong and you do not have feelings for her, then being a friends. Good deal.
Therefore as to your question about why married men are careless, well some while married take their wives for granted. See they no longer have to put any effort into courting because they feel they already have her. Not right thing to do my friend because the woman will feel lonely and sad and such events like the kiss with you can occur, though not right, it has and in some cases the woman can make silly and or drastic decisions in leaving their husband because she will feel like attention will be given elsewhere.
Not all are men doing this but some women too. For some reason some couples just do not put forth the initial effort once and after married and it is a shame, because after marriage, in my opinion even more effort should be applied because a marriage is hard work and must be freshened and surprised from time to time.
I will not lecture the error of having kissed a married woman as I see you understood it was wrong and you do not have feelings for her, then being a friends. Good deal.
Therefore as to your question about why married men are careless, well some while married take their wives for granted. See they no longer have to put any effort into courting because they feel they already have her. Not right thing to do my friend because the woman will feel lonely and sad and such events like the kiss with you can occur, though not right, it has and in some cases the woman can make silly and or drastic decisions in leaving their husband because she will feel like attention will be given elsewhere.
Not all are men doing this but some women too. For some reason some couples just do not put forth the initial effort once and after married and it is a shame, because after marriage, in my opinion even more effort should be applied because a marriage is hard work and must be freshened and surprised from time to time. @shibham (16977)
• India
26 May 11
Hi HWG...
I know her mental situation.. better that she has no objection whatever i want to do with her. For her, its not a big deal but yes, its really a big deal for me. When she kissed me, i dont know why i was not able to push her.
No, i am sure that every hubby are not the same like this stupid. But here she is unlucky as she has owned such a husband.
Anyway, Have a nice day.
@Jiabsa (511)
• India
25 May 11
I cant' blame you..I can't blame that lady also. But..circumstances....yes, circumstances lead you to do something wrong. She is unlucky because she never get any affection and recognition from her husband. Whenever she started to get it from you, her mind automatically changed towards you. That is natural. Everybody want love and recognition. What kind of husband is he! If he is not capable of giving primary things to his husband and child, why he got married? He is neither a good husband nor a good father. I won't tell you to leave this relationship. You can continue your friendship, but no physical attachment. It is sin.
@shibham (16977)
• India
25 May 11
yes friend..
I just have written same to response no. 17... not exactly circumstances but the main source is her husband. Tell me, a wife who was waiting for her hubby on her anniversary day expecting some surprises but... at midnight he entered home being tipsy and fell in a deep sleep. What a poor wife can do then except crying?
I dont know why he is so careless... i asked her that are there any lady in his life... she refused. Then what may be the reasons.. i am really confused.
Yes, i shall follow your advice. Thanks.
Have a nice day.
@fengweilun1 (16)
• China
24 May 11
Hey,dude.lucky you.I am falling in love with a woman, too.But she has already had a boyfriend.We lives far away.After she had a boyfriend ,she has never called me.
