If I eat lying down ...
By cynthiann
@cynthiann (18602)
Jamaica
June 3, 2011 2:09pm CST
If we're honest then most women would admit that there is one situation in their lives where they tell themselves that calories don't count.
To me calories don't count if I am standing. Most animals eat whilst standing and they are not overweight. Well, elephants perhaps are, but giraffes aren't. Then again elephants may be the right size for elephants and not overweight at all.
Therefore, according to my logic, food is harmless if eaten whist standing.
Naturally, if I eat when I am lying down then any food I eat automatically qualifies as medicine. Because I must be sick right?
Of course if you find yourself standing in the kitchen in the dark, then anything consumed is definitely not only without calories but without fat too.
Last night I collided with a piece of pie that contained a few raisins and I needed the vitamin C from the raisins so I consumed it whilst standing.
So what situations do you face in your lives where calories don't count?
Therefore, according to my logic, food is harmless if eaten whist standing.
Naturally, if I eat when I am lying down then any food I eat automatically qualifies as medicine. Because I must be sick right?
Of course if you find yourself standing in the kitchen in the dark, then anything consumed is definitely not only without calories but without fat too.
Last night I collided with a piece of pie that contained a few raisins and I needed the vitamin C from the raisins so I consumed it whilst standing.
So what situations do you face in your lives where calories don't count?5 people like this
15 responses
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
4 Jun 11
hi cynthiann oh definitely the day after thanksgiving early in the morning a nd its still dark I used to sneak into the kitchen in the dark and grab a piece of pumpkin pie and of course I ate it while standing in the dark. thus no calories ata ll. of course if you eat while lying down definitely its just medicine as you must be ill.lol I do so love your
logic here.
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
4 Jun 11
Thank you Hatley.
I just wanted to make a few people smile as for many it has been a depressing week.
I just wanted to make a few people smile as for many it has been a depressing week.1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
3 Jun 11
Good logic, lady. I hate raisins & wouldn't eat raisin pie if i was starving. If that's all i had to eat i would definitely loose weight. That's my logic, lol.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
4 Jun 11
I'd just as soon eat a bug as a raisin. I'll tell u what i'll drink my part of the rum & u can ruin yours by putting raisinns in it. YUCK.
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
3 Jun 11
Good logic too. But have you ever soaked raisins in rum until they are all plumped up? They taste better that way. Hic
But have you ever soaked raisins in rum until they are all plumped up? They taste better that way. Hic 1 person likes this
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
4 Jun 11
Okay - I will eat the raisins as I do not want you eating bugs!
1 person likes this
@mansha (6298)
• India
3 Jun 11
Oh there was a time when I could eat all I wanted to and not gain and ounce now that age has long passed and now even I drink water it goes straight to my bloated belly and calories even floating in air get stuck to me. Still I eat chocolates while working late in the nights on mylot and can't resist the cakes with chocolate icings...well if I have so many too loose and if I can loose them all some day I can loose a 1000 more some day...so calories do not count not anymore
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
3 Jun 11
Well done! That makes perfect sense to me. You must keep your mouth firmly closed when chewing the cake, so that the calories in the air are not able to slip in.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
3 Jun 11
If you have pie for breakfast...like coconut cream or banana cream...then the crust is your bread food group....the middle is dairy with fruit and there is none cholestral topping on it....a perfect breakfast food! Also if I eat ice cream with my sisters....no calories!
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
3 Jun 11
Calories never count if you don't read the label that says what the calories are.
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
3 Jun 11
Surely you can put your finger over the calorie number at the top?
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
3 Jun 11
Oh I have to read the labels to see if the food contains salt
Too much salt can be hazardous to your health
Too much salt can be hazardous to your health1 person likes this
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
3 Jun 11
Ohh! That is hard but I could try. Some food actually make you lose weight because it is so tasteless that it burns off calories. she is referring to airline food plus the large Brandy that is drunk to take away the bad taste left in the mouth from eating the food served whist flying.
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
3 Jun 11
now you are the comedian. that sounds like something my son would think up. i wish i had that kind of intelligence to think of these things. thanks. when i go eat my peice of strawberry cake in a minute now, im standing up@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
3 Jun 11
Strawberry cake? I would love some so please send it now by Fed Ex and I will send you some rum
@bunnybon7 (50973)
• Holiday, Florida
3 Jun 11
i would if i could get out. cant drink though. especially rum. i drank rum once yrs ago and ended up doing strip tease for hubby. but drinking gets to my stomach these days
@AmbiePam (93739)
• United States
4 Jun 11
Did you know if you put two bites of pasta on a fork, it only counts as one bite of pasta? Totally true. And if I put two pieces of pizza on top of each other and eat it as one - well only calories from one slice are absorbed. This is such a well kept secret I hesitated to share it. 
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
7 Jun 11
I did not know this ambiepam. This is great information. sorry to be so long in responding but was at my daughter's until yesterday. Thank you for shharing this well kept secret. I will not share it with anyone on mylot
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
3 Jun 11
I've been really bad.. I stopped counting calories and have put on weight again. All of my summer clothes from last year are way too tight.. it's depressing.. but I'm so stressed out about other things that I can't even think about that right now.
To me, food eaten while at work contains no calories because I burn it off while working.
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
3 Jun 11
It is the stress. I need to lose 10 lbs immediately in a month and have no will power to do so. Food consumed at work definitely contains no calories.
Food consumed at work definitely contains no calories.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
5 Jun 11
Since we just had one today I would have to say that the only situation in my life where calories don't count is during family gatherings. It is not just any family gathering that I am talking about, it is the ones where we are getting together with our extended family. The reason that I don't think that those calories should count is because of the fact that it is rare for our extended family to all get together and we do pot lucks so I get to eat things during those that I don't get to eat at other times.
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
7 Jun 11
I agree with you absolutely. The calories at family gatherings do not count. And if you stand whilst eating then you lose weight too
@bounce58 (17385)
• Canada
7 Jun 11
Not so sure about eating while lying down, but...
The place I work is just a couple of blocks away from a McDonalds. If you count the trip back and forth, it is only 4 blocks. The calories burned from walking these 4 blocks is surely greater than the combined calories of a Big Mac and fries.
So with this logic, the daily fastfood lunch is actually healthy for me!
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
7 Jun 11
You are on the right track my friend. After walking for such a long way you deserve healthy food. Something substantial to keep you going until dinner time
@myswirlyagelessmind (379)
• Philippines
4 Jun 11
You're funny!
I don't really count calories but I have a general idea of what food items would directly affect my pouch. Calories in a grande caramel cream frappuccino surely don't count when I'm consuming it during a gab-fest with my girlfriends and I can have all the dark chocolates I want because they're rich in antioxidants and I'm already in my thirties, I need all the antioxidants I could possibly take to boost my immune system.
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
4 Jun 11
Ah yes, the pouch.||i think that my skin got confused with all my pregnancies. It did not know if it was coming or going. I just pretend that the pouch is not there! Listen, on the farm we had cocoa trees where we dried and grated the chocolate from cocoa pods. I can assure you first hand that it comes from a tree - chocolate is a vegetable and you must eat up all of your vegetables to be healthy!
@marapplestiffy (2182)
• Philippines
4 Jun 11
You made me smile, and the comment above made me
I think he's a he, don't you?
Now, to your topic, calories just don't count when your swimming at sea...you can eat anything and no calories gets in your body because the sea sucks it all@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
4 Jun 11
Of course - that makes perfect sense. I am so glad to know this
@lajonez (477)
• Poland
4 Jun 11
Lol i really enjoyed reading your post :D it was so funny and before I was mad and now I'm not anymore! And I also think my calories doesn't caunt when my husband is making diet and I'm baking something and then eating fast so he'll not eat too many pieces so he'll not break his diet :D
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
4 Jun 11
Thank you. My aim was to make people laugh. I and many others have had a stressful week so I wanted readers to smile. Mylot has been slow from yesterday though.
You have the right attitude - watching your husband's intake of calories but not your own. Well done! lol
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
4 Jun 11
I am sorry that you do not understand. It's a women thing. Thank yo for responding
@NoWayRo (1061)
• Romania
3 Jun 11
There are no calories in the food I eat to convince my goddaughter to eat too. It doesn't matter if I have to eat three servings to convince her that it's tasty and she should eat at least two teaspoons of whatever's on the menu; that's food for a good cause, so it has no calories.
Also, what I eat while cooking doesn't count. That's not eating, that's working.
And I think elephants are just the right size, the giraffes are anorexic and make everybody else look bad.
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
3 Jun 11
With regard to giraffes it could be that they are anorexic because it takes so long for the food to reach their stomach's. Just a thought. No, when you eat food off the grandchildren's plates you are definitely doing a good deed. Well done!
