discussion comes to mind
do you take gifts of insults
if you are given the gift of insult
should you take a gift of insult or just let it re
what say you
who does the gift remains with
If You're Given a Gift Of Insult and You Don't Take It Who Does It Remains With?
By zed_k4
@zed_k4 (17589)
Singapore
June 3, 2011 11:41pm CST
Dear friends ,
Here's another question for the day. Just something which comes across my mind. In life , we give compliments and praises (sincere ones) to friends , peers , family members or whoever we wish to give. Supposedly , out of the blue , someone has given you a gift of insult , if you don't take it who does the insult remains with?
Check out my theory here , and tell me yours. If supposedly the gift of insult is being given to you in an unfair way and you know that you aren't , does it makes sense to say that the gift remains with the giver. I know it sounds confusing but in a way you are not affected because you do not receive it at all. What say you on this topic ? Thanks in advance all. If I reply late , do bear with me with me but I'll try my best to come..
10 people like this
23 responses
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
5 Jun 11
Hi zed 
I have learned in life to accept one and all but does not mean I have to take all they dish out. Basically they can behave their way and I will not return the unfavorable comments and or insults as I have found it is best never to stoop to a persons level and let them deal with their own issues.
See when I go to bed at night I do not dwell on anything anyone perhaps might of said as my conscious is clear and clean therefore they insults or "gifts", whichever it is, is not well received my me.
I have learned in life to accept one and all but does not mean I have to take all they dish out. Basically they can behave their way and I will not return the unfavorable comments and or insults as I have found it is best never to stoop to a persons level and let them deal with their own issues.
See when I go to bed at night I do not dwell on anything anyone perhaps might of said as my conscious is clear and clean therefore they insults or "gifts", whichever it is, is not well received my me. 3 people like this
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
4 Jun 11
Hi Zed!
It seems that there are many around, wherever we happen to travel, carry sacks loaded with gifts which they randomly hurl at us, regardless of whether we are deserving of their efforts or not.
If I am there to receive or not has no bearings on the effects that their gift will have. I have a tried and trusted invisible shield which protects from their munition and sends it straight back at them 
I rest assured, and more so as the years pass, that they all fall into the same category: those who throw them are portraying themselves in their insults because, ever since childhood, I was taught that 'it takes one to know one' 
It seems that there are many around, wherever we happen to travel, carry sacks loaded with gifts which they randomly hurl at us, regardless of whether we are deserving of their efforts or not.
If I am there to receive or not has no bearings on the effects that their gift will have. I have a tried and trusted invisible shield which protects from their munition and sends it straight back at them
I rest assured, and more so as the years pass, that they all fall into the same category: those who throw them are portraying themselves in their insults because, ever since childhood, I was taught that 'it takes one to know one' 3 people like this
@vandana7 (100609)
• India
4 Jun 11
First and foremost kiddo, I am not sure that the compliments that go the friends way or even stranger's way are always sincere. As far as strangers are concerned, we dont really care and we dont want to pick fights or earn enemies. We may also have something to lose. So we may compliment and praise with utter indifference. But as far as a dear one is concerned, it becomes harder to hurt. So I always ignore compliments, and praises.
Now, coming to your theory of insult..that too needs to be ignored may be. In so many years, I have been wrong on many occassions. I have taken insults, and retaliated. In retrospect, I do feel I have been immature. But your theory makes sense. Practically is it possible? Gotta try. :)
3 people like this
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
5 Jun 11
Hello Makcik , I can't speak for all , but if I were to give praises or compliments , I'd do it sincerely ..although they take it the wrong or right way , it's up to them.
You immature Aunt ? I doubt so. You always have wise words to give ..
Just take it away from the top and let the neggers nag ...whatever it means , haha...
Have a great weekend , I smell curry ..........later I'm going to have chicken tikka..
You immature Aunt ? I doubt so. You always have wise words to give ..
Just take it away from the top and let the neggers nag ...whatever it means , haha...
Have a great weekend , I smell curry ..........later I'm going to have chicken tikka..1 person likes this
@thesids (22180)
• Bhubaneswar, India
4 Jun 11
Hi zed
I 100% agree with your version. Insult - for whatever reason, anyones fault - it stays with the giver - whether I take it or not. As the giver, it is s/he who loses respect or friendship or whatever that was between us. It also sends out a message to me that being insulting, being abusive is not good, there are always better ways to put the points across and if not done the right way, the giver is sure to lose (maybe more than the taker).
I 100% agree with your version. Insult - for whatever reason, anyones fault - it stays with the giver - whether I take it or not. As the giver, it is s/he who loses respect or friendship or whatever that was between us. It also sends out a message to me that being insulting, being abusive is not good, there are always better ways to put the points across and if not done the right way, the giver is sure to lose (maybe more than the taker).
@lkbooi (16070)
• Malaysia
4 Jun 11
Hi zed, no matter to accept or reject the gift of insult given is already there. For
we have already knowing the fact. It's inevitable that this has been branded in our mind deeply when we at sight of it as it's given out of the blue. It's hardly to believe that it seems like nothing happen if we learn that a gift of insult is given to us.
2 people like this
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
5 Jun 11
Yes , but think positive. Out of 100 people not 100 will not like you and hurl insults ..it's just 1 or 2 which may not like what you represent or whatever jaded thoughts they would want to have on you. Therefore , the insults remain with them and reflect themselves. Take care my friend.
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
5 Jun 11
That's so true because at the end of the day it's what those people think and not yourself..so just be who you are steph...take care.
lkbooi , it doesn't stick at all because we are invincible , teehee..
Especially if all are taken in good humor then they would also be able to receive back..
@drannhh (15219)
• United States
5 Jun 11
Oh, I completely agree that it remains with the giver if you don't take it, but if you do take it then I believe that it flies around a while and then goes back and hits the sender in the head with a big WHAMMY! So either way it ends up with the giver, but if you chose to be the victim of an insult then you just borrow it a while first, which is not necessary as you know, but sometimes people don't have enough self worth to figure that out.
1 person likes this
@JenInTN (27514)
• United States
5 Jun 11
I think it is a wonderful theory and a great way to look at it. If the insult is refused...it should stay with the one who created it. Maybe they can think about their creation and apply it to themselves. Insults often develop from opinion and personal issues anyway. It's their problem, not ours.
2 people like this
@purplealabaster (22091)
• United States
12 May 16
I have the unique ability of taking what some people view as an insult and thinking it is a compliment, so in that case, I feel that we are both given a gift.
2 people like this
@UR_Forever_Raja (985)
• India
15 May 16
@Daljinder I thought what word is a complement only 
1 person likes this
@marapplestiffy (2182)
• Philippines
5 Jun 11
it stays with them times two when we don't accept it or not acknowledge it at all...
I never really care about the insults people throw at me, so I guess it just bounces back to them, I don't get why people have to put other people down...
@Daljinder (23236)
• Bangalore, India
13 May 16
Who said insults are out of the blue? I can provoke them too.
Alright being serious, the insults remain with the giver but they do affect the one being gifted the insult on emotional level. One can not always be immune to that gift.
Alright being serious, the insults remain with the giver but they do affect the one being gifted the insult on emotional level. One can not always be immune to that gift.1 person likes this
@mansha (6298)
• India
4 Jun 11
Yeah but its a hard gift to refuse, I read somewhere that when a person insults you he tries to hit a mark inside you and if you have ever felt the same thing for yourself then that insult gets a hook to hang on and it clings to you and pains you. So get rid of your own hooks and that will make the insult slip away. We react because we hear an ounce of truth in the insult hurled at us once we stop letting it hook on to us it will just not affect us.
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
5 Jun 11
That's absolutely true ..Captain Hook will be so proud ,hehehe kidding.
I've talked about this to someone else before and he said that a gift of insult is like a plague in the mouth and you don't swallow but just spit it. I think that makes sense too , especially it's logical that the real intention is to hit whatever the attacker thinks he's doing. I think the bravest one is to learn how to control one's temper. Thanks for your response.
@dpk262006 (58678)
• Delhi, India
30 May 16
If anyone insults me, I pity on that person because by insulting me, s/he is revealing how mean, ill mannered or negative minded s/he is. I know that I am not infallible, if I've committed a mistake, I do not mind admitting it. However, I do not like to be insulted without any reason.
I do not carry the bad feelings with me (if insulted unnecessarily) and I let it go.
@daeckardt (6237)
• United States
6 Jun 11
I wouldn't consider an insult a gift. That concept doesn't make sense to me. Unfortunately, I tend to take anything I hear to heart whether it is true or not so it would affect me even if I know it isn't true. I'm sure that my late reply to this discussion couldn't cause too much trouble if you are late to reply to it as well. Have a great week!!!
1 person likes this
@bournecaindelta (2477)
• India
5 Jun 11
I say give it back.. It's for free anyways.. But it so happens that sometimes in those insults we find our nirvana. For example, I had this friend who was really lean and all, and everybody used to tease him calling him names and stuff. It was only a short time before he found some problem with them and started returning in the kind. Like one tall guy he called him some sort of pole lol.. And from then on they stopped troubling him and left him alone.
bourne
@fishtiger58 (29820)
• Momence, Illinois
13 May 16
I think an insult stays with the giver and the receiver, no matter what anyone says it's hurtful. So even if I don't accept the insult it was heard by me and hurts me. We have all given insults as we are imperfect humans, but what a world this would be if we didn't.
