I enjoy freedom

Dear indahfth, please forgive me if I presume too much, but I take your words to mean you are more relaxed when your husband is away, because you are afraid of being reprimanded for something you have done wrong in his eyes. Is that correct? Are you afraid of your husband -- or, at least, of his judgment? If that is correct, the only wrong you are doing is to yourself, in subjugating yourself to the (perhaps impossible) expectations of your husband. All any of us can ever do is his or her our best -- and if you can go to sleep at night knowing you have done your very best at any task, then you have nothing for which to feel guilty. I know we come from extremely different cultures, but if my assumptions are correct, my heart hurts for you as you labor under this burden of expected perfection. You will be in my thoughts for a very long time.

Hi Indahfth, Every body likes freedom.Its good that you felt it but its not the way your husband should not be that much rude that you feel relaxed when he goes out.He should not always be complaining. Its really sad to know that your father in law is ill.But from your discussion it pretends as if you are not worried for your father in law which is not good. Freedom is at its own place & relation is at its own place you should discuss your husband regarding illness of your father in law to make your husband also relaxed.

Everyone needs a break from their spouse sometimes. It's not good to be stressed out day in and day out. Don't feel guilty, it's not wrong. Try to find ways every day to escape even if it's just an hour a day. Try to get him out of the house more. Send him on some errands. Go visit friends or relatives on your own.

I think nothing wrong with that, I mean if we are in depressed situation and there is a day of from its, its feel like heaven. Don't you visit your father in law too? I mean thats our family do, I means he is your husband dad. I means what his family will think if you not company him, they maybe think you are not care and made bad judgement as usual. I think its an occasion you both need to go.

Hi indahfth No it is not wrong to enjoy a little freedom, though you love your husband and want him around there is nothing wrong with enjoy a bit of alone time. Sadly it had to happen due to his father being ill but a little alone time is always good because as you said you could create a little breathing room and still do your work at peace. I am glad and happy you have had a little freedom, this recharges your mind and thoughts and allows you to rest.

In my opinpion,maybe you should have a communication with your husband after his father turn healthy.Everyone may make mistakes in something.He shoule learn tolerance.After that,you will be free everyday.

Fear nothing as women are co-partners in a marriage. We give our undivided support to our husbands. When you live in fear of your husband you will never be happy in your marriage. Husbands have no right to ill treat their wives or treat them as their obedient servants. Marriage should not deprive us of our individual rights.

I admire you for feeling guilty that you are enjoying freedom while your husband's father is ill. Don't worry dear,don't feel guilty about it,just enjoy your freedom,your husband never feels guilty when he sees you feeling like a prisoner and when he sees your son feeling afraid whenever he is around. Just enjoy the moment and be yourself ,i am sure your son also feels happier like you. have a great day

Glad to know you enjoy a day of rest and you could have more time to pamper yourself and give more time to focus on your needs. well, your husband only do her duty to care for his father and very concern, what you feel now is not being inconsiderate but you just enjoy having a free time. not to be mistaken to being happy when the side of your husband feel worry about their father. when he come back i am sure you would back in the same routine.

Hello!Your husband is not at home,but you have the feeling of freedom.How much this a little anomalies.This means that you and your husband should be strengthened in communication exchanges.Because in my opinion,can become the husband and wife,regardless of husband and wife to treat each other candidly.I wish you happiness!

I think it is only in your mind, you let it arose from your fear that you husband will 'eat you alive' when you made some errors. Is your marriage become like a house or terror? I don;t think so. Is your husband ever make some mistake? I think so, because he just a bone and flesh plus syahwat (appetite & desire). If you feel that way, every time your husband at home, I wonder how is your condition before you become his wife (when in dating time)? About your 'enjoy of freedom' because of your husband absence, it is a natural feeling, but you can control it or may istigfar all the time. It is your life..........

Nice to know that you are at least free from worry of your husband reprimanding you. Yes, try to do all things nicely and rightly , so he wouldn't find a chance to reprimand you. No, don't feel bad of feeling free now that your husband is not home. It's a natural feeling of a wife battered by her husband if not physically, but verbally. Enjoy your temporary freedom.

it's not wrong if you feel fredom. bUt your husband's father is sad. you ought to show your attention as a good wife.

Nice discussion friend that is good that you enjoy freedom and want to live alone but why you want to live alone its not good and whats happen to your father in low.

I feel badly for you that your husband has to check your work for errors. And you have to make sure all the work I have done well and without errors, so when my husband came home from work. Your husband sounds like a real sweetie. I am sure he is sad because of his dad but normally the way he treats you is very sad to hear about.

Most of us who live with people enjoy our time alone, even if the reason is sad. Alone time is to be treasured.

Obviously your husband is too demanding and that is why your are happy that he is not there. If he treated you better you would be happy and free all the time. Talk to him! A marriage is a partnership and not a tyrant and slave relationship.

Why are you so afraid with your husband, as you have said before he is always angry and always reprimand your child whenever he is at home.Have you done something which he doesn't like.You are his wife and as a couple he begets a son and he is supposed to love and care for you.Maybe he has problem not with regard to his father's illness but I guess in your relationship.Why don't you talk to him to clear things out, it is uncommon for a couple who are not in good terms with his/her partner to live together.You both should sort things out for the sake of your son. I'm happy for you also at least you enjoy your freedom for two days if it could be called freedom and I do hope that his father gets well soon and to both of you to have time to talk.

hi, being along sometimes is we consider it as we are really free alone to do what ever we want, such as to sleep or just nothing to do or no one could someone force us to move,we really enjoy that sometimes to be alone but silent.

For me, that is not wrong as long as we don not do anything harmful to others and to ourselves, i understand you, it is a feeling of relief knowing you don't have to worry that you will be scolded at, and hurts your feelings.