Polyamory and Open Relationships
By sephrenia
@sephrenia (567)
June 9, 2011 2:27am CST
For those who don't know what Polyamory is, it is literally translated as 'many loves'. In practice, I define this as the ability to love more than one person in the same way and having the freedom to do so. It's not quite an accurate description, but it's the best I can come up with so I'll stick with it.
I define open relationships as being able to see other people outside the main relationship but much more casual than polyamory (rightly or wrongly) and is, in some ways, easier to handle than polyamory.
Now, what I'd like to know is, is polyamory and open relationship styles an emerging trend around the world or is it something that will always be considered 'on the fringe'?
This is NOT a discussion about my own personal life, just something I am interested in discussing with other Mylot members. So, with that in mind, I open the floor to you members of Mylot
2 people like this
6 responses
@arnouardian (286)
• United States
9 Jun 11
wow..i just knew this word "polyamory". it sounds funny:)
i don't know about the real cases of polyamory. for me, it's just almost impossible to love more than one person in the same way. we can't divide our feelings that much. even only giving our feelings (love) to one person already consumes our energy, time, and money.
but open relationship has been a common thing as old as the human history. it is not unusual for people to love someone outside main relationship. this is what open relationship is for: to give wide possibility to have relationship with anyone, but also have a very close friend at the same time.
1 person likes this
@sephrenia (567)
•
9 Jun 11
Thank you very much for taking the time to reply to my post.
Do you not think though, that polyamory is just an extension of the open relationship idea? I mean, if it's possible to be intimate with more than one person, then surely it is possible to love more than one person too?
From what I understand though, you're right about balancing time, energy and money between the relationships and it can be a problem for those who are polyamorists and so everything is discussed in minute detail so that nobody is left out.
Thank you again for replying :)
@arnouardian (286)
• United States
9 Jun 11
you're welcome sephrenia:)
i said it's impossible because i never experience it. though i know some people can love more than one person, but i can't do it. i just can't do it:) i don't know why. maybe because i can't divide my heart for several people. if someday i can do it, i will get back to you.hehe..
oh yeah, polyamory is the possible extension of open relationship:) its next level:)
1 person likes this
@sephrenia (567)
•
9 Jun 11
How do you know that though? I mean, can you say for certain that this is absolutely true?
It's quite a strong statement to say that this is not possible. Do you have any evidence to back up your stance?
I'm not trying to be mean, I'm genuinely curious.
@bingskee (5234)
• Philippines
9 Jun 11
i have to say i am not in favor of any of the two. sadly, it seems to be an emerging trend. even in our country with closely knit family ties and with many reservations, these things seem to be the 'in' thing. i consider it as just something as a fad, and with hope that it is only a fad that will go away.
i have not researched or surfed the net though if this is the real case now around the world. it was just an observation with people and friends, and friends' friends. documentaries also support these scenarios of open relationships.
1 person likes this
@arnouardian (286)
• United States
9 Jun 11
wow..i just knew this word "polyamory". it sounds funny:)
i don't know about the real cases of polyamory. for me, it's just almost impossible to love more than one person in the same way. we can't divide our feelings that much. even only giving our feelings (love) to one person already consumes our energy, time, and money.
but open relationship has been a common thing as old as the human history. it is not unusual for people to love someone outside main relationship. this is what open relationship is for: to give wide possibility to have relationship with anyone, but also have a very close friend at the same time.
viewpoints about open relationship really depends on society. in my home country Indonesia, i believe open relationship will always remain on the fringe. our society do not agree with this. they want to see a marriage with commitment. not a free and open relationship where couples do not have to have commitment with each other.
1 person likes this
@Amberstormraven (15)
• South Africa
10 Jun 11
Well this trend has taken root in S.A. and although I can't see the use of a open relationship or Polyamory I do have friends and a BF that think it could work. I also have a friend who grew up on a Polyamory family and still sees it as a way of living. If it works for you, try it, but for me it's not the way to go. I don't share!!!
1 person likes this
@sunnystarfish (210)
• Philippines
11 Jun 11
I think its becoming a trend nowadays especially to those who don't want to be committed. Well my idea of an open relationship is this, you can freely date anyone you want. You're not exclusive to each other. I personally, at first, prefer that idea but in the long run i found out that to be in an open relationship you have to be tough. Tough in a sense that you should not be jealous with anyone your partner is dating. Cause in the first place you don't have the right. Another thing is, what if you wanted to escalate the relationship to another level, cause you already developed feelings for the person. Lets say you want it to be exclusive but your partner does not like the idea. So you should be sure that the feeling is mutual between you so that no one will get hurt. Before entering this kind of relationship, you should be open to all consequences.
1 person likes this
