The semi-happy marriage

Hi behen In India where still many believe that marriages are for live, they should keep trying to find ways to keep the passion, love and also to an extent - conflict alive. This definitely adds and if a couple can get this corrected, they can be happy. But for those who find it difficult - maybe due to traditions, or even communication issues, such marriages that stagnate - make life miserable and these problems multiply when there are kids. The poor kids suffer more confusions and so I would sugest that they break up before they have kids. For us(me and your bahu) we have open discussions and yes, there are times, when we both start feeling low or left out. We discuss and try to get back to some point where things are starting to get better for sure. You know about the issue that happened a few weeks before and now, we are both happy as you suggested and we found that suggestion ok for us. I mention this to say that we keep trying and looking out for any opinion, suggestion (if we are stuck up) and yes, maybe that is because we love each other more and believe in making the partner happy.

Friend what is the semi-happy marriage if marriage is happy then full happy marriage life. I want to suggest to every people before taking the decision of divorce they should try to safe their marriage life. Now the divorce is trend. How after 18 to 19 yrs of marriage life the couple can say they wants to live separate. But in opinion all is depend upon God they can do reverse our mind.

Hmm..a semi happy marriage..I'm not sure. I think it might actually describe my relationship now though. I mean I am not busting at the seams..but I am not miserable either. I think...or at least it has been my experience..that there is a time when a couple becomes comfortable with one another. It's not the passionate whirlwind it was in the beginning, but it presents the semi comfort that I am thinking the article might be referring too. I don't think it is a bad time unless someone in the relationship starts to desire something else. I guess that remains to be seen for me..lol

it depends. if we already have kids, i will stay. kids will always be the priority. after deciding on staying for the kids, perhaps, we could work on making the semi- a happy without the semi.

So many people go into a marriage and are clueless! They rush into it and then wake up and realize what a stupid thing they did! Alot of couples have no idea how to communicate,work at a marriage or think this is the way it is suppose to be! I am sure some people think "well my parnts marriage was like this,so mine is". I think parents need to talk to their kids more on marriage so they don't rush into it and how to work on a marriage! Somewhere the translation of marriage,love,passion,respect,communication and trust has been lost! No wonder people leave loveless,passionless and no communications marriage! Thank GOD I never will get married or date again!

Hello Sarah and Shalom! Its been a while that I was in hiatus from mylot, but I'm trying to cope up the times I missed in myLot. Well, I just want to share to you my thought about this very nice topic of yours. I believe that there is no perfect relationship, no perfect husband, no perfect wife, etc. Sometimes, it is people's expectations that make them feel sad or happy about the life that they have chosen. For me, as long as the two of us are always communicating everything follows. Understanding, caring and above all loving will just flourish like the daffodils on the fields, blazing like gold-lets dancing under the rays of the sun. Lastly, there will always be good times and bad times in couple's lives, but as long as they will stick together with full understanding and love to each other, things will be just fine. Have a great day! ^_^

I never settle for less then I really want...at my age I am more willing to be compromising...on some things. Others I wouldn't compromise as all...I waited all my life to do the things I do right now....I deserve to get the chance to enjoy them! Sometimes when you marry there is times when you have to give up something you like to do......I won't....so nope probably won't get married again anyway!

Almost all marriages reach that state of 'semi-happy'.In the beginnig love predominates and all faults in both partners are completely and blindly overlooked.Gradually and after a few years and a few kids the marriage settles down into being a routine affair and love recedes into the background giving way to just tolerating each other.This is the most dangerous phase of a marriage when both partners feel a need for freedom and are a bit bored with each other.Men start taking interest in other women without the knowledge of their wives and women too feel a need to break away from the daily routine.Inorder to save their marriage and also for the sake of their children the couple decides to stay together but they then go through the motions of a happy couple when in reality they silently wish to break apart.In the olden days when conservatism was to the fore couples stayed together in a loveless marriage because divorces were taboo.In the present era where people have almost broken the taboos more and more married couples are preferring to seperate rather than live together in a semi happy marriage.Those who are single have a 'i told you so attitude' but secretly want to experience the joys and sorrows of marriage even if it is at a cost of their freedom.As for myself i would say no to a semi-happy marriage and would rather stay on my own, which in reality is true as i am single and none the worse for it.

For me not but if you married to a boy who is not industrious and have more kids to settle it is not happy married.

The attitude to marriage differs from person to person .Some marry for money;others marry for love.For getting married,everybody has freedom of choice.It has been more than 30 years since I got married.Although I and my better half have different hobbies and temperaments but we live none the less a happy life.We never hold out extravagant hope of life and feel deeply that happiness consists in content.In addition,we bear in our mind all the time,"do as you would be done by".

I think it depends I'm the marriage and what is making it semi happy. If things like communication and interests aren't there then I'm not sure that its worth it. I would want to grow old with someone that I know we could have good conversation after the kids are grown. I think you need to have good communication otherwise you might find yourself feeling alone even though you are with someone.

I think it would depend on the man, and whether or not we have children involved. If we're still (semi) in love and can manage to interact, collaborate, and live our everyday lives in a peaceful way then I would stay for the kids. However, I would probably leave as soon as the children are grown and out of the house. If we hadn't had children yet, I would most likely get a divorce. Life is too short to be "semi"-happy with anybody!