Happy People Do not Compare

Good discussion bingskee.. I think in the world that we live, comparisons are a part and parcel of our lives. It would be a lie to say we dont compare. We compete in class, we compare. We have brothers and sisters, so we compare. Our parents compete in their workplace, so we learn of comparisons. Likewise, there are neighbors, aunts, cousins...endless. I think comparison is fine. It is also fine to use that as a motivation for doing better. It goes wrong if people start passing snide remarks out of jealousies when they cant catch up or do something to put the other down. Truly happy person remains focused in himself or herself and tries to do better I guess, while others try to pull the achiever down. That would be my way of differentiating.

A lesson that my mother dinned into my ears when I was a child was that I must never compare myself to others. She also lives by this dictum. There was a great lyricist in our regional language and I am an ardent admirer of his songs. In one song ,the words used to go like this " there are a million people who are worse off than you. Think about it and derive solace about how well you are". This made a fine impression on me when I was young and adopting this ideal has always kept me contented and happy. I thank my mother, my school and my teachers for instilling this sense of gratitude in me .

I can see your point. Of course that is in general, as there are bound to be some comparisons about things in life, even if they are not on purpose. Rather it is just something that are in our heads, trying to really subconsciously make distinctions by comparisons. So when you really think of that in the strictest terms, no person in the history of the world was ever happen. It is a part of human nature and one of those things that often times cannot be helped when you really think about it. However, its not something that we should make a habit of doing. Or going out of our way in doing. Doing it in general, that doesn't really make us a bad person. However, doing it constantly, really trying to get everything done in life, comparing everything, that is not exactly the most healthy thing. In the end, we are going to really make a lot of comparisons in life, that are going to lead to us feeling resentment. It is how we let this resentment guide our life. That is the distinction that I feel with life.

Hi bingskee I believe all of us at one point or other do compare ourselves with others. I personally can say that when I hear about misery and misfortunes I definitely see mine as being small things and therefore, I can count my blessings. When others are happy, then it reminds me that life is quite short therefore, I must not dwell on my small things and relish all the brighter sides of life. I don't find it to be a bad thing if one is solely doing so to improve oneself and or help others to remind them of their blessings also. See when they are sad/ill we can compare ourselves as being blessed and sympathize with them so that maybe that can make them a bit happy too.

What you said is full of philosophy.Sometimes we might as well compare ourself with others,namely others' virtue,knowledge,Industry,etc.However,we mustn't just be jealous of others'virtue or strong points,we should look upon those as a challenge to greater exertions.

I find myself comparing when i'm frustrated. it only comes whenever i'm having the worst days or depressed. it is true that people who are happy do not compare and it because happy people are contented. i believe that happiness only lies in contentment. someday we'll feel contented, we just have to go through life to see all the beauty of it until we become contented and be happy. :)

Dear Ms Bingskee A really wonderful discussion I am one of those who always compare. Anything, I find comparing myself with others for a while (if not more). But yes, I compare only to the extent where I can use the comparision for growth and positivity. I do not compare for finding out faults in me or even in others. I compare - what you would have done if you were in my shoes (because I think everyone thinks differently) and this helps me many a times to see the other prespectives to my own problems. On other times, when I am low, I compare myself with someone who is in a more miserable or worse situation than me, take note that this is not happened with me and I am safe, blessed that I am not in his shoes. I think, comparisions should always be around but only for those who take them positively, in a healthier aspect and do not start blaming or feeling bad, kealous or anything of this kind. We all have brains, we all know what is good and what is bad... but when we start comparing, we mostly start on the wrong lines making unhealthy conclusions many a times.