If you gave a small gift...

I would assume first that the child hadn't given it to her yet. I wasn't prompt giving stuff that was given to me to give to parents when I was in school. I might call and ask the mother if she'd received it, and then judge by her response whether she'd like it / meant to say thank you or not. If she said something along the lines of "Oh yes it was nice" I'd assume she didn't like it / didn't like that it was a late gift. I know some mothers ar all about the fashion for their children, and so want the most expensive stuff for them, when that's just not happening.

She might just be very busy. Unless it is that you've seen her since and she hasn't mentioned it? To be honest, if she has a baby in the house, she might not be the one unpacking her son's bookbag. So her son might not have given it to her, or her husband might have pulled it out without asking the son whom it came from. I'd send a quick, cheerful email to make certain it was received. If it's been received, she probably just hasn't gotten around to writing a note. I have 13 month old in the house, and some days it's a miracle if I cook dinner.

I hate that. Makes me just not want to do anything for anyone! I had a similar thing happen recently. My 5 year old grand daughter is with her mom (shared custody due to divoce, my son's daughter) and her little cousin (mommy's sisters little boy) is a year younger than she. I always try to keep thing calm and even when she is with me and let her talk about her other side of her family and she always talks about her little cousin. It was his birthday and she was just so excited about it and stupid me, always trying to keep the peace and do the nice thing and all...my GD wanted to make her cousin a gift (we do crafts alot!) so I had this stupid idea to bake him a giant sugar cookie "cake". I just rolled out sugar cookie dough, took a coloring book page of Blue's Clue's dog and cut it out to make the pattern. Use this pattern to cut the cookie dough into the shape of the dogs head - about 12"x12" in size. DId the same thing to make 4 "paw prints" cookies about 5"x5" in size.. Then I decorated it with tubes nad icing and blue and it turned out so cute and perfect! Amazed myself that I did so good after not having done anything like that in nearly 10 years! Well, I always take her home on switch day and so when I met her mother at the meeting place, I had GD carry it to her and tell her about it. Mother said oh how nice, Jacob will love it.....and that was it. I didn't to much expect anything from her as she is not the boys mother, but I did expect a thank you of some kind from the mother. Did I get it? No. I thought, maybe they'd have him write me a note, color me a picture..something to say thank you. Did they? Nope..they never said thank you at all! Now I know we are all not related but still...we are acquainted and speak and all, and a thank you was TOTALLY called for. But didn't get one. No text, no call, no note....not even from my x-daughter in law to say " my sister says thankyou so much for that". I got nothing. And to top it off...the next week, I asked my GD if she and her cousin liked the cookie and she told me that they were not allowed to eat it!!! I asked her why not and she said cause it wasn't the theme of the party! THought I'd turn that car around and go shoot some white trailer trash butt! The nerve!!! So I hardly do anything for anyone that isn't my immediate family anymore. I am a nice person, but have learned to not let others take advantage of me. Maybe you could ask her how the baby looks in the outfit, or did the outfit fit? or something like that to spark a comment.

I've encountered that with my own family, a nephew that lives a few states away. I sent him the set of books my brothers and sister and I were raised with ranging from nursery rhymes and fairy tales to adventure stories for teens. I never heard back. I finally asked my sister, his mom, if he got them and she gave him what for! I didn't feel bad ratting on him, it was rude and I gave up something very precious to me. I think you should call your friend, say how sorry you haven't been over lately but did she get your gift or did her son forget to give it to her. It's rude not to call, email or send a note through her kid to yours so you'll get it. Obviously, she's either not a friend that's committed or she's just been too darned busy to do anything but raise the kids. If it's the former, write her off and let her go. If the latter, be understanding and help where you can even if it's just to be a sounding board.

No, I would not assume anything as you do not know if her son delivered it to her. There is nothing wrong in giving her a call and asking about the baby etc and then inquiring if she received the gift from you via her son. It will be either a yes or no or an apology. I find that poor communication causes so many problems so we must not assume anything. Give her a call. Tell her that your kids had colds but you were thinking of her etc. Maybe she is just overwhelmed with the work of a new baby and genuinly forgot to thank you Don't take the chance of losing a friend over this.

The sad thing is a lot of people don't say "thank you" anymore when receiving gifts. And for us unassuming gift-givers, asking about the gift might be too much. I don't usually ask the whereabouts of the presents that I give out. I guess parents should set an example to kids in saying thank you for all gifts received, big or small.

I'd probably follow up with her to see if she got it. I mean, you can't go automatically assuming she's being rude or anything.. because you don't know. She might not have received it.. the card may have been lost so she doesn't know it's from you, she might have planned to send a thank you note but has lost track of time as moms usually do. You know how it goes.

I think I would give the mom a call to see if she, at least, got the gift. You know how kids are...it could be lost, on the bus, under his bed when he emptied his bag etc and etc. Call her and mention that you sent a 'little something' home with ? and you are just wondering if she got it. Good luck.

Perhaps it might be okay to give her a ring just to ask if she got it. All the while the boy might have forgotten it to give to her or maybe even lost it while at school. At least you would know if she got it or not. Yes no matter how small the gift maybe one should always be grateful. It is also a delight when someone appreciates your gift.

Personally, I wouldn't care. If I only paid $2 for it wouldn't matter to me if she said thank you or not. Then if she didn't recieve it yet it is only a $2 loss.